


The Wrong Side of Reality

by defenselesswriter



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Ableist Language, Alternate Universe - High School, Angst with a Happy Ending, M/M, POV Stiles, Sick Claudia Stilinski, Tutor Derek
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-02-12
Updated: 2018-11-24
Packaged: 2019-03-17 12:53:14
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 28
Words: 41,377
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13659381
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/defenselesswriter/pseuds/defenselesswriter
Summary: What is it like to be able to sit down at a computer and do what you’re supposed to do? What’s it like? Is it wild? Is it easy?Stiles stares at the blank document wondering the same thoughts over and over. His fingers are tapping on the desk while his head bobs to the beat. At this point, he has tried everything. He even put on classical music to help him focus, but all he can do is stare at the blank screen hopelessly. This paper is due in - he checks the clock - it’s due in three hours. It’s currently five am, and he hasn’t slept.An empty two liter bottle of Mountain Dew is lying on the floor, and he can’t even feel it. He can’t feel anything.His head drops to the desk in defeat. He is going to fail his senior year because of this paper that he just can’t fucking do. The outline is done. Sources have been found, but he can’t just write the damn paper.





	1. Chapter 1

_What is it like to be able to sit down at a computer and do what you’re supposed to do? What’s it like? Is it wild? Is it easy?_

Stiles stares at the blank document wondering the same thoughts over and over. His fingers are tapping on the desk while his head bobs to the beat. At this point, he has tried everything. He even put on classical music to help him focus, but all he can do is stare at the blank screen hopelessly. This paper is due in - he checks the clock - it’s due in three hours. It’s currently five am, and he hasn’t slept.

An empty two liter bottle of Mountain Dew is lying on the floor, and he can’t even feel it. He can’t feel anything.

His head drops to the desk in defeat. He is going to fail his senior year because of this paper that he just can’t fucking do. The outline is done. Sources have been found, but he can’t just write the damn paper.

There’s a knock on his door that makes him lift his head as his dad opens the door.

“You okay, son?” he asks.

Stiles nods and throws up a thumbs up. “Almost done.”

His dad nods and smiles. “I’m proud of you for working so hard.”

Stiles’ stomach drops in guilt for lying to his dad, but he can’t tell him the truth. “Thanks, Dad. You headed into the station?”

“Yep. I’ll see you tonight for dinner.”

“Love you.”

“Love you too,” his dad says as he walks away.

Once again, Stiles finds his forehead in contact with his desk. Maybe they’re star crossed lovers. Maybe the desk and his forehead are meant to be together forever. That’s certainly how it feels.

He rolls his head to the side to check his phone for the thousandth time in the last ten minutes. Obviously no one is texting him. Everyone he knows is asleep because that’s what normal teenagers do at five in the morning. They sleep because they already did their paper.

Sitting up, he has a newfound determination to do this paper. He is going to do it, turn it in, and pass senior year. Maybe he can even find himself accepted to a state college. Maybe.

He starts typing, and it feels like he’s got this. He really does. The caffeine is hitting him now, and his hands are shaking, but he’s typing, and that’s all that matters. Halfway through the paper, he remembers he had an outline to help him, but he’s too far to go back now. Plus, if he got up to look for his outline, he’d lose momentum. Instead, he keeps going and going and going and going and.

“What is this crap?” Coach Finstock asks after school, holding up Stiles’ paper. “I’ve read it three times now, and how did you go from macroeconomics to circumcision?”

“Do I detect a hint of awe in your voice? Perhaps even some part of you is impressed?” Stiles asks with a smile.

Finstock slams the paper on his desk. “Stilinski. This makes no sense. I can’t accept this. I have to give you a zero.”

Shit. That would definitely make Stiles fail this class. Fuck. “No, Coach. I can’t get a zero. I tried really hard on this paper. Please. I’ll do anything. I’ll clean the lacrosse gear every day for two months. Anything, Coach.”

“Hale!” Coach yells.

Stiles looks behind him, not realizing people were still in class, but of course, there’s Derek. He’s frozen halfway through the door, and Stiles wants to laugh at how ridiculous he looks with his shoulders hunched up near his ears, but Stiles isn’t in a laughing mood. Not when his grade is at stake here.

Slowly, Derek unfreezes and turns around, looking directly at Finstock and purposefully not looking at Stiles. Figures.

“Yes, Mr. Finstock?” Derek says, voice low and sounding scared, which is fair. Stiles is a little scared too. He has no idea what’s running through Coach’s head right now.

“Do you have any free time?” Finstock asks. “What am I talking about? Of course you have free time. It’s not basketball season anymore.”

“Uh, yeah?” Derek says, confused.

“I need you to help Stilinski with his paper and some extra credit.” Coach reaches down and picks up Stiles’ paper again, waving it around. “This is crap. I need you to help him write not crap.”

“You need me to tutor... _Stiles_?” Derek asks, still looking confused. His eyes dart to Stiles for a second, and then they quickly move away.

Stiles groans and looks back at Finstock. “Coach, I don’t need a tutor. I’ll be fine. I just need to redo the paper.”

Finstock shakes his head. “Nope. I made up my mind. Hale will help you with this paper and a few other extra credit assignments. That’s the only way you’ll pass my class while still playing lacrosse.”

“What if I say no?” Derek asks.

Stiles turns to face him again, wondering if it would be too much if he got down on his knees and begged Derek to help him. He needs to pass this class. He needs to graduate on time.

“Then Stilinski will have to find himself another tutor that I approve of while not playing lacrosse anymore this season.”

Stiles can’t help but close his eyes in frustration. He wants to bang his head against a wall. His high school career _cannot_ depend on Derek Hale. It can’t. The dude hates Stiles.

After a long silence, Derek finally speaks up. “I’ll do it.”

Stiles’ eyes open quickly to stare at Derek in shock. “You will?” which is probably the first thing Stiles has said to Derek in about three years.

Derek nods. “I will.”

“Thank you,” Stiles almost whispers because he isn’t sure how else to react.

“Can I go now?” Derek asks, looking passed Stiles and at Finstock.

“Both of you can get out of my classroom,” Coach says, waving them. “Stilinski, I expect to still see you at practice in fifteen minutes.”

“Yes, sir!” Stiles says, practically running out of the room behind Derek. “Hey, Derek!”

Derek turns around with an eyebrow raised. “Stiles?” And the way he says Stiles’ name with such disdain kind of hurts.

“I just, uh. Sorry. I wanted to thank you again. You really didn’t have to do this, but I really appreciate it. I know you hate me and everything, so yeah. Thanks.” Stiles can’t help all the words trying to come out of his mouth, but he takes a breath and finds that he’s finally done with the word vomit.

“No problem,” Derek says with a shake of his head. He starts to walk away, but then stops, still facing away from Stiles. “Oh, and I don’t hate you.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i know i said i would post every Monday and where i am, it is still technically Monday, so technically you can't yell at me yet.

“How’d the paper turn out?” Stiles’ dad asks as they eat their Chinese food for dinner.

Stiles slurps his chow mein noodles quickly and talks over the food in his mouth. “According to Coach, it was crap. He’s making Derek tutor me.”

“Derek?” his dad asks, his voice sounding a little too excited for Stiles’ taste. “Derek Hale?”

Stiles sighs and swallows his bite before wiping his face with his sleeve. “Yeah, that Derek. The only Derek we know of.”

His dad’s eyes narrow slightly. “Stiles.”

“Sorry, sir,” Stiles mumbles, wondering how people are able to put so much emotion in just saying his name today. 

“I didn’t know you were at the point you needed a tutor,” Stiles’ dad says after a few minutes of peaceful quiet.

Stiles ducks his head, his face turning red out of guilt. “This paper was kind of make or break for me,” he admits.

His dad sighs, leaning his forehead onto his hand. “What happened, Stiles? You used to be so good at school. You used to love it.”

Stiles shrugs. “I still love school,” he says softly. “It’s just harder now. It’s high school, not elementary school anymore.”

“I know that,” his dad says, looking at him with impatience etched into his face. Stiles wishes he could take back what he said, so his dad will never look at him that way again. His dad has been looking at him like that way too often the last few years.

He almost wishes he could take everything back the last few years, have a fresh start and fix everything. What if his brain actually did the things it was supposed to rather than be a mess of screaming thoughts about everything else? What if his thoughts stopped being a running loop of the same things? 

Maybe if he could take everything back, he’d still be friends with Derek.

“Derek?” Scott asks in shock later on their Skype call. “Derek Hale?”

“Yep,” Stiles says, withholding the sass this time. 

“Isn’t he on the basketball team?”

“Yep,” Stiles repeats, his voice sounding dead to his ears.

“I didn’t know he was good at economics,” Scott comments with a frown. 

Stiles shrugs. “He’s pretty good at everything.”

“Oh, yeah. You guys used to be friends before I moved here, right?” Scott throws a ball up in the air and then barely catches it, almost falling out of his chair as he catches it. 

Stiles laughs at his best friend and shakes his head. “Yeah, we used to be friends, but then we got to high school, and everything changed.”

“Yeah, high school changes a lot,” Scott comments absentmindedly as he keeps throwing the ball. 

Stiles thinks that truer words have never been spoken. He feels like everything changed once high school started. Derek stopped being friends with him; Scott moved to Beacon Hills and filled the void; Stiles’ dad became sheriff; and Stiles’ brain stopped working slowly but surely. Or did it just get exponentially worse in high school? Was it already not working before? 

He shakes his head to get rid of all his thoughts and to focus on Scott’s ball tossing. He has now added a lacrosse stick into the mess and is trying to catch the ball with the stick. Somehow, he ends up hitting himself in the face with the stick, which Stiles does not laugh at because he’s a good friend.

Just kidding. Stiles definitely laughs.

“Like you’re any better!” Scott argues defensively. 

Stiles shrugs. “That’s fair.”

“So does that mean you’re gonna start hanging out with Derek again?” Scott asks, not looking at the camera.

“I’m going to study with him,” Stiles says. “But unless he had a sudden change of heart then no. There will be no hanging out.”

Scott nods like what Stiles just said made everything better. Well, that’s a first.

The next day at school, Derek approaches Stiles at his locker. “Meet me in the library at lunch,” he instructs, his face devoid of any emotion.

Stiles remembers when he could make Derek laugh just by snapping his fingers. He wonders what happened between them. “You’re giving up your lunchtime for me?”

“Do you have time after school?” Derek counters with a raised eyebrow because he has the most expressive eyebrows Stiles has ever seen and that includes his sister Cora, who also has ridiculously emotive eyebrows.

Stiles shakes his head. “Lunch works.”

“See you then.” Derek turns and walks away after that. And damn when did Derek get a really nice ass, and why is Stiles staring at it?

It’s not like Stiles is new to the bisexuality thing, but he never thought he’d be attracted to Derek. Not that he is. He’s not. Just admiring aesthetics. 

The first half of the day passes by quickly, and suddenly it’s lunchtime. Stiles rushes to grab his food and get to the library. 

“You’re late,” Derek mumbles, not even looking up from his textbook when Stiles approaches the table.

“I needed to get food,” Stiles defends himself. 

Derek looks up at the tray of food with an unimpressed look. After a moment of silence, he looks up at Stiles with a raised eyebrow. “Are you going to sit?”

“So bossy,” Stiles says under his breath as he sits while Derek goes back to reading his textbook. “Guess some things never change.”

Derek’s head snaps up and both of his eyebrows are raised. “Excuse me?”

“I guess some things never change,” Stiles repeats looking Derek right in the eye.

It’s a tense silence between them as Derek’s jaw clenches. “Let’s just get this over with,” he says, shutting his textbook and putting it away. He pulls out their economics textbook and then looks at Stiles’ tray of food. “Are you even allowed to have food in the library?”

Stiles shrugs. “I gotta eat, my dude.”

“Don’t call me dude,” Derek quickly snaps. 

“Sorry,” Stiles mumbles, focusing his attention on opening a bag of chips.

“Finstocks gave me your essay,” Derek tells him. “He was right about it. You’re smarter than that, Stiles.”

“How would you know?” Stiles is quick to ask, looking back up at Derek. “You don’t know me.”

“Not anymore,” Derek comments, looking down at the textbook.

“You said you didn’t hate me,” Stiles remembers. “Why do you act like you do?”

Derek shrugs. “We’re here to talk about economics, not us.”

Stiles leans back in his chair and munches on his chips. “So what wise wisdom can you impart on me?”

“Did you actually do any of the assigned reading?” Derek asks.

“I tried,” Stiles admits, shoving a handful of chips in his mouth. He doesn’t want to talk about his failures with anyone, especially Derek.

Derek’s face almost softens, which looks close to what Stiles remembers him looking like. “Is there something going on?”

Stiles shakes his head. “Nothing I wanna talk about with you.”

And just like that, Derek’s face hardens again. “Okay, so this essay. I want you to rewrite it, and I’ll edit it. Sound good?”

Stiles nods, but he doesn’t say anything.

“Do you want my number in case you have any questions?” Derek asks.

“You trust me enough to have your number?” Stiles laughs.

“Do I have to tell you not to send dick pics?” 

Stiles laughs again, throwing his head back and almost choking on his spit because he’s really graceful like that. “No, you don’t have to tell me that.”

Derek nods. “Good. Here’s my number.” He writes it down on a corner of his notebook and tears it off then hands it to Stiles. “Don’t abuse this privilege.”

“Okay,” Stiles says, pressing his lips together to try not to laugh. 

Derek collects his stuff and walks away, leaving Stiles alone at the table with his food and Derek’s phone number.

Cool.

He spends the rest of the lunch period staring at the ten digits that mean something more than what Stiles can comprehend. Why would Derek give him his number when he could have just given his email? Email probably would’ve been easier and more professional. Numbers are personal. This means something. Stiles just can’t name it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> you can find me on tumblr at dude-its-stars-hollow.tumblr.com and you're more than free to come yell at me about my writing or sterek or life or whatever. just don't yell at me to be mean bc i'm soft and sensitive okay


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Monday!!

After lacrosse practice, Stiles showers the sweat and dirt off as fast as he can. For some reason, he has all this motivation to work on his paper. He wants to hurry and get home before the motivation disappears because who knows how long this will last?

Once he’s home, he runs straight up the stairs and collapses on his desk chair. He pulls up his old essay and deletes it and tries again. Suddenly, he remembers he had an outline, so he goes to look for it, finding it in the bottom of his backpack all crumpled up. 

It’s a really good outline, he finds. It’s really detailed, and he put a lot of work into it, which is surprising. He hardly puts in any work towards anything lately. 

He shakes his head of those thoughts and follows his outline closely, doing further research as needed. After a while, he finds that he doesn’t really need Derek’s number. He doesn’t have any questions. Everything makes sense as soon as he focuses on it. 

It takes him a couple hours, but he finishes the essay with minimal distractions. Scott tried calling once, but Stiles sent it to voicemail, texting Scott to let him know that Stiles was doing homework.

**Scott: since when do u do hw?**

**Stiles: since now**

He prints out the new essay and staples it, hoping Derek will like it, but then he thinks, who cares if Derek likes it? Derek is just his tutor. It doesn’t matter if he likes it. What matters is that it’s a good essay, and it better be. Stiles worked really hard on it.

He falls asleep soon after printing his essay, and when he wakes up with a growling stomach, he realizes he forgot to eat last night. He wishes he could say that it’s the first time that happened, but it isn’t. 

Rushing, he gets ready for school and puts some Pop-Tarts into the toaster. Before they’re cool, he starts eating them as he runs to his Jeep. He continues to eat as he drives, probably speeding a little too much because his mind is on eating. 

When he gets to school, he tries pulling into a space, but then there’s a loud honk that makes him slam on his brakes. He looks up and realizes that a black Camaro is already halfway into the space Stiles was trying to get into.

“ _ Fuck _ !” Stiles yells to himself. He puts his car into reverse to find another spot, and as he drives by the black car, he spots Derek looking at him from the car. Great. He almost ran over his tutor and ex-best friend. Awesome.

He finds a parking space, and this time, it’s actually empty. He pulls in without a problem, and once he is parked, his head lands on the steering wheel. What the hell is wrong with him? He wasn’t looking at his phone or anything. His dad really emphasized the dangers of texting and driving, especially when Stiles drives a stick shift. So why didn’t he see Derek?

Squeezing his eyes shut for a moment, he imagines crashing into Derek’s really nice car. It would have been so embarrassing, and it probably would have made Derek hate Stiles for real this time. Plus then Stiles’ car insurance would shoot up because it was most definitely his fault, and his dad would probably be  _ really _ mad. 

With a deep breath, he loosens his eyes and the rest of his body that was tight with tension. He focuses on breathing for a few more moments and then raises his head to see Derek staring at him from in front of the jeep.

Quickly, Stiles grabs his backpack and gets out of his car, figuring he might as well face the dude he almost killed a second ago sooner rather than later.

“Derek,” he starts, but Derek holds up a hand to stop him.

“Stiles, are you okay?” 

“Why are you asking me that?” Stiles wants to laugh because it’s so ridiculous. “ _ I _ almost ran  _ you _ over!”

Derek shrugs. “I’m fine, but you saw me. You looked right at me, but it’s almost like you didn’t see me? I don’t know. Your dad didn’t teach you to drive like that.”

Stiles doesn’t want to admit Derek is right...but...he is. “You’re right,” Stiles sighs, running a hand through his hair. “I don’t know what’s going on with me.”

If he didn’t know any better, Stiles would say that Derek looks concerned. He opens his mouth to say something and then closes it, shaking his head. “Just be more careful next time,” Derek says, but he doesn’t sound angry. He walks away quickly towards the school, leaving Stiles confused.

When the warning bell rings, it brings Stiles back to the present and makes him realize that he’s almost late for class. He hurries to his first class with Mr. Harris and barely sits down at a table before the bell rings.

“You almost just got detention, Stilinski,” Mr. Harris says with a bored look directed at Stiles.

“Don’t worry, the day is still early,” Stiles responds with a smirk because damn he hates this teacher almost as much as Mr. Harris hates him.

There’s a cough to the right of Stiles, and when he looks over, he can see Danny trying to hide his smile in his fist. Points for Stiles for making Danny laugh, not that it’s that hard since he likes everyone, but still. Stiles considers it an accomplishment.

Most of the day goes by quickly while Stiles thinks about Derek this morning and how weird he was. Why wouldn’t he be angry? Stiles almost hit him. With a car. That’s kind of a big deal. His anger would have been justified, but there was no anger. Just concern. Is there something concerning about Stiles? Should Stiles be concerned about himself? Has he now thought of the word and its various conjugations too many times that “concern” is no longer sounding like a weird word? 

God, it’s a mess being in his head, which is why he’s happy when he meets up with Derek at lunch again. He sits down at their table and pulls out his rough draft of his paper. 

“I wrote the thing!” Stiles announces loudly.

Derek is quick to shush him with his pointer finger over his lips and everything. “We’re in a library.”

“Right,” Stiles stage whispers. “I wrote the thing.”

Derek reaches over and grabs the paper, looking over it for a moment. “I’ll read it and edit it tonight if you’re okay with that.”

“Yeah, I appreciate that, dude. Thanks.”

Derek nods, slipping the paper into his backpack. “Now, Finstock wants you to do an extra credit project.”

“Did he give you any details?” Stiles asks.

“Yep,” Derek answers. “It’s about marketing. Anything about marketing that you want to talk about.”

“But we’re not learning anything about marketing,” Stiles says slowly, confused.

Derek shrugs. “I can’t say that Finstock’s mind ever makes sense.”

Stiles snorts. “You can say that again.”

“I can’t say that Finstock’s mind ever makes sense.”

Stiles stares at him for a moment and then looks away so he won’t laugh loudly in the library. He presses his lips together, and even that’s not enough, so he takes a note from Danny’s book, covers his mouth with his fist, and coughs. 

When he finally looks back at Derek, he looks almost proud of himself. Some could argue that Derek even looks smug.

“So,” Stiles says and takes a deep breath. “Do I get your help with this project or am I on my own?”

“I can help,” Derek tells him with a nod. “But it would take more time than we have at lunch. We would have to meet after school.”

“I have lacrosse practice Monday, Wednesday, and Friday,” Stiles remembers.

“So how about Thursday?” Derek asks with an eyebrow raised.

“Works for me. Where at?”

“Your house is quieter than mine,” Derek reminds him.

Stiles nods, thinking of Derek’s loud family where everyone actually wants to be around each other all the time. Not that Stiles doesn’t want to be around his dad a lot, but they definitely need their space from each other. His mother’s death made them a little more distant rather than closer, but Stiles doesn’t want to think about that right now.

“When is the project due?” Stiles asks.

Derek’s eyes are narrowed like he can sense something with his head tilted slightly, but he doesn’t say anything about it. “Next Friday.”

Stiles gives him a thumbs up. “Thanks again for your help. I’ll start researching tonight and hopefully have some stuff for you Thursday.”

“That would be good.” 

“See you later,” Stiles says, getting up from the table.

“See you later,” Derek repeats, and it isn’t until Stiles has left the library that he realizes that it almost sounds like they’re friends again, but that could never happen.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i know it's tuesday and i'm sorry. yesterday was wild and i didn't have time to upload, but here it is!!!

Stiles collapses on the couch, exhausted from school and lacrosse practice. It was a long day, and he’s so happy to be home. He’s so tired that he ends up snoozing for a little on the couch until the front door opens.

“Stiles?” his dad calls out.

“Yeah?” Stiles sits up and notices all the lights are off, making it really dark in the house. “Oh, sorry. I fell asleep.”

His dad walks into the room, still in his sheriff’s uniform. When he notices Stiles on the couch, hair disheveled obviously from sleeping, he sighs. “You didn’t get the groceries for dinner?” he asks.

Stiles bangs his head on the back of the couch. “Shit! I forgot.”

“Language.”

“Sorry,” Stiles immediately says, raising his head back up as his dad turns on the light. “I’m so sorry, Dad. I totally forgot.” But how did he forget that? His dad texted him right after school, and yet he totally spaced on it.

His dad doesn’t look like he believes him and rubs his forehead in frustration. “I guess we’ll have leftover pizza. Again.”

Stiles follows his dad into the kitchen, feeling really guilty. As he watches his dad put pizza in the microwave, he remembers something.

It was when he was thirteen. He remembers this so clearly still. He walked home from school and ran into the house, excited to see his mom.

“Mom?” he called out as soon as he walked through the door. He put his backpack down and kicked off his shoes, running towards the kitchen because she loved to cook, so that was where she always was. 

As he got closer to the kitchen, he stopped because it smelled weird, almost like something was burning. He ran faster towards the kitchen, seeing a small flame in the microwave. He rushed over to open it and grab the leftovers wrapped in aluminum foil out. Throwing it on the counter, he grabbed a dish towel to smother the flame like he remembered his mom teaching him when he made the same mistake a couple years ago.

When he looked up once the fire was out, Stiles saw his mom walking into the kitchen. “Mom!” he said, concerned. 

As soon as she saw him, she screamed. “Get out of my house!” she yelled. “How did you get in here? My husband is a deputy! We keep guns in here. Get out!”

She kept yelling over and over, and Stiles was just stunned. “Mom, it’s me,” he pleaded, reaching towards her.

She smacked his hands away from her. “You’re not my son! Get out!” She lunged towards the counter and grabbed a knife out of the holder, pointing it directly at Stiles.

Stiles had no idea what to do, so he ran out of the house. He knew his mom was having memory problems, but that bad? He didn’t know it was that bad, but he just kept running and running away from the house, not knowing where he was going.

“Stiles!” someone shouted, and through his tears, Stiles saw a blurry Derek.

Derek walked closer and gripped Stiles’ shoulders. “Stiles, are you okay?”

Stiles shook his head. “My mom. She. Derek. My mom.”

“Is your mom okay?” Derek immediately asked, his voice deepening in concern.

Suddenly, Stiles couldn’t breathe. He just couldn’t. Everything was hurting, and everything was wrong. His mom didn’t know who he was. How could she not know? He was her son. 

“Is your mom hurt?” Derek asked, shaking Stiles a little.

“No,” Stiles got out. “She just. Derek. She.” He sobbed even more, and Derek pulled him into a hug. Stiles desperately clung to him, probably holding him too tight, but he needed his best friend, someone who knew who he was because at that time, it wasn’t his mom.

“Stiles?” his dad asks, bringing Stiles out of his thoughts. “You okay?”

Stiles shrugs. “I’m not super hungry. I think I’m just gonna head to bed. ‘Night.”

“‘Night,” his dad says, looking confused because when is Stiles ever not hungry?

When he gets up to his room, Stiles quickly changes into sweats, feeling suddenly super uncomfortable in his t-shirt and jeans. He sits on the floor at the foot of his bed, leaning his back against the mattress and bringing his knees up to his chest. He knows what’s happening now, knows the warning signs this time around. When he was thirteen, he had no idea, but now? Now he knows that it’s a panic attack.

He holds onto his knees tightly as he starts hyperventilating, trying to be quiet so his dad doesn’t hear the sobs threatening to break out of his chest. Leaning his forehead down on his knees, he tries to focus on breathing, but his mind won’t let him.

All he can see is his mom screaming at him, looking at him with fear in her eyes as if  _ he _ was going to hurt her. His mind scrambles around that memory, replaying it over and over as he struggles to breathe and come back to reality.

The doctors thought she was going crazy, tried to have her committed, but Stiles’ dad refused and got another opinion, demanded they get an MRI of her brain. It was frontotemporal dementia. His dad was right to get the MRI, but by the time they realized what it was, it was too late to even treat. 

Stiles remembers sitting by her hospital bed, holding her hand as she slept because when she was awake, she had no idea who he was. She always thought he was trying to kill her or hurt her, but when she was asleep, she looked so peaceful. 

His breathing finally slows down a little, and he notices his sweats are soaked with tears. When he relaxes his body, he notices how tightly he was holding himself. His joints and muscles are stiff, so he stretches them out before wiping at his face.

Panic attacks are common for him. They happen about once a week now, but this one was worse than usual. He doesn’t think about his mom’s illness until he has panic attacks. Then his mind attacks him with the hardest memories of that year, reminding him over and over what Derek said to him.

Stiles shakes his head and rubs his eyes. He’s exhausted now and most definitely ready for bed. Hopefully he can sleep, but it’s a hit or miss after panic attacks. He either stays up all night, remembering everything, or he passes out and has nightmares. Either way, it isn’t pleasant.

“You’re not my son!” echoes through his head, and he takes a deep breath. She was sick. It wasn’t her fault. It was Stiles’ fault. He was home with her the most. He should’ve noticed she was sick earlier. The moment she forgot the word for the stove, he should’ve known something was wrong. She was always in the kitchen, could name every ingredient to her recipes in her sleep. A healthy Claudia would have never forgotten the word for stove.

Looks like it’s one of those nights where he is up all night, thinking of his mom.

Impulsively, he pulls out his phone and pulls up Derek’s contact info and texts him.

**Stiles: Hey, it’s Stiles. You up?**

It takes a few minutes for a response, but he surprisingly gets one.

**Derek: Yeah, what’s up?**

**Stiles: Can’t sleep. I was thinking about the project. Maybe I could do something with how certain drugs are marketed?**

**Stiles: Not hard drugs like cocaine. Pharmaceutical ones. Like the ones you see on TV.**

This time, the response is quicker.

**Derek: Yeah, that could be interesting. Not done too often either.**

**Stiles: Thanks. Why are you up? I’m guessing it’s not because you’re thinking of my project.**

**Derek: Uh no. Laura came down randomly because she claimed she missed Dad’s lasagna. I think it’s because she is stressed about school. Either way, she’s keeping me up with college gossip.**

Stiles laughs out loud, smiling as he remembers how dramatic Laura can be. He also remembers how close she and Derek were, or well,  _ are _ . 

**Stiles: Any of the gossip good?**

**Derek: She saw a guy naked in the middle of the hallway of her dorm lying on the ground. She offered him a robe apparently. Now they’re going on a date this weekend?**

**Stiles: Scandalous. What was his excuse for lying on the floor naked?**

**Derek: Drunkenly fell asleep before he reached his dorm I guess.**

**Stiles: College sounds wild. Can’t wait.**

**Derek: I think I’ll pass on drunkenly passing out in dorm hallways naked.**

**Stiles: Where’s your sense of adventure?**

**Derek: Hiding behind my sense of pride.**

Stiles laughs again and lies down on his bed, turning off the lamp. He forgot how much he missed talking to Derek. It’s fun, and Derek’s sense of humor has gotten better with age.

**Stiles: Fair enough. Catch me drunkenly passing out on the floor of dorm hallways though.**

**Derek: Naked?**

**Stiles: As the day I was born.**


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i know i know i know it's tuesday, not monday and i'm SORRY but here it is! thank you for your patience i love you all

“No, I can’t,” Scott says, almost pleading with Stiles as Stilee steers his best friend toward the girl he is currently in love with. “I don’t know what I would say.”

“If it’s meant to be, conversation will flow,” Stiles tells him.

“How would you know?” Scott asks, looking back at Stiles with his eyebrows raised.

Stiles sighs and rolls his eyes, pushing Scott’s face forward to keep them moving across the cafeteria. “One minute you’ll be talking about a project and the next it’ll be about drunkenly passing out naked.”

“What?” Scott asks, looking behind him again.

“Focus,” Stiles scolds him, pushing Scott’s face again. “Girl of your dreams, sitting right next to the girl of my dreams. You’ve got this. Start with, ‘Hi, my name is Scott. We have algebra together, right?’ Easy as that, bro.”

He can feel Scott’s shoulders tense up under his hands. “It’s okay, buddy. You’re fine. Your ass is fine.”

Scott takes a deep breath as they get closer to the table, and Stiles drops his hands to let his buddy talk to the girl of his dreams.

“Allison?” he says softly.

Lydia looks up first, her strawberry blonde hair flicking to the side with the movement. “Are you lost?”

“He’s talking to Allison,” Stiles says over Scott’s shoulder.

Lydia pierces him with a glare. “Are  _ you _ lost, Stilinski?” Hey, at least she knows who he is.

Allison laughs, placing a hand on Lydia’s arm. “Calm down there.” She smiles at them and then focuses on Scott. “You’re Scott, right?”

He nods, and even though Stiles is behind him, he knows Scott has a dopey smile on his face. “Yeah, we have algebra together?”

Allison beams at him while Lydia looks back down at her phone. “Yeah, we do! Did you do today’s homework?”

“Yeah,” he says and then sits down at the table in front of her, making Lydia look back up at him like he offended her. “It was hard, but I think I did okay. What about you?”

She tucks her hair behind her ear, still smiling, which Stiles thinks is a very good sign. “I think I did okay. My dad helped me a little if we’re being honest.” She laughs, and Scott does too.

“I was wondering,” Scott says, stopping for a moment, taking a deep breath. “Are you free this weekend?”

She nods. “Yeah, why?”

“Do you want to maybe hangout Saturday night?” he asks, and it takes everything in Stiles to not pump his fists in the air in pride and excitement. His best friend is doing this! Stiles knew he had it in the bag.

Allison smiles even wider, her dimples deepening. “Yeah, that sounds great.” Stiles wants to fist pump again, but doesn’t, which he really should be commended for. Then he deflates when Allison looks to Lydia and says, “What do you think, Lydia?”

Lydia looks at her and then looks at Scott with a calculating look. “Jackson and I were going to go bowling Saturday night.”

“Perfect, we can join you!” Allison suggests.

“I suppose,” Lydia says slowly and then looks at Stiles. “What about you, lurker?”

Stiles blinks in confusion, pushing his chin out and turning his head slightly. “I’m sorry?”

“Are you coming or not?” It’s supposed to be a question, Stiles thinks, but Lydia says it as a demand.

“I guess I’ll be there?” he says, confused. Is she inviting him? Why? Why would she do that?

She turns back to Allison and nods. “Then it’s settled.” Then she looks at Scott with her eyebrows raised. “Bye now.”

Scott scrambles to stand up and quickly turns around, grabbing Stiles’ arm to pull him away. “Did that really just happen?” Scott whispers when they’re farther away.

“I think so,” Stiles says. “It doesn’t feel real, but I think it did, dude.”

Scott is on cloud nine for the rest of the day and won’t stop smiling. 

Derek even mentions it after school when he arrives at Stiles’ house. “What was up with McCall today? He looked weird.”

“I think the word you’re looking for is happy,” Stiles comments as he lets Derek in. “Also a hello would’ve been nice.”

“We just saw each other five minutes ago,” Derek tells him with a roll of his eyes. He sets his backpack next to the couch and sits down as if he has done it a thousand times...which he probably has.

“Why is McCall so happy?” Derek asks. “Did he rescue a kitten from a tree?”

“No,” Stiles laughs. “But that sounds like something he would do. He asked Allison out. She said yes. Now we’re all going bowling Saturday night.” Which will be super awkward for Stiles as the fifth wheel with no date. Lydia has Jackson. Scott has Allison. Stiles has...no one. As always. Wait a second. “You still love bowling, right?”

“Uh, yeah,” Derek says with a confused frown.

Stiles smiles at him, and Derek immediately knows what’s happening and is quick to say, “No.”

“Please?” Stiles begs. “Derek,  _ please _ . I can’t be the awkward fifth wheel. It will be,” he pauses because he can’t think of a word.

“Awkward?” Derek suggests.

“Yes!” Stiles exclaims, waving his hands. He gets down on his knees in front of Derek. “Please. Please, Derek. I will do anything.”

Derek’s eyes narrow at him. “You have to tell me something.”

“Anything,” Stiles says quickly, which was probably a bad idea.

Derek leans over to his backpack and pulls something out. He places the papers on the coffee table and then looks back at Stiles. “Tell me why you’re failing econ when you’re incredibly intelligent.”

As Stiles looks closer at the papers on the coffee table, he notices that they are his paper that he wrote and gave to Derek. He stands up, picks up the paper, and then sits on the couch next to Derek. Looking through it, he sees that there are not a lot of markings done by Derek. Does that mean Derek didn’t see a lot to change about it? That’s a good thing, right?

“Stiles?” Derek asks, reminding him to answer the question.

Stiles looks up at him and presses his lips together as he thinks of an answer. “I’m not sure,” he finally answers. “High school has been really hard for me, and this year has been brutal. I can’t tell you why. It’s not that I don’t understand the material. I just can’t bring myself to do the work until very last minute, and then what I put together is usually crap according to Finstock.” 

“It’s not just econ you’re failing, is it?” Derek asks, looking concerned.

Stiles hates that Derek keeps looking at him like that lately. It’s not his place to be concerned anymore. “No,” Stiles admits. “I’m failing almost every class except pre-calc.” It’s really hard for him to admit. His dad has hardly questioned how Stiles is doing this year and didn’t question when Stiles’ report card went missing. 

“Stiles, what happened?” Derek asks, sounding even more concerned than he looks.

“My mom died,” Stiles snaps. “That’s what happened.”

Derek looks down at his lap where his hands are resting. He nods, accepting the answer. “I’m really sorry about your mom.”

“Yeah, me too.” Stiles doesn’t want to talk about it, especially with Derek. 

“So Saturday?” Derek changes topics. “We’re going bowling?”

Stiles lights up and is incredibly grateful that Derek changed the subject. “Yes, please. If you want to and are not busy.”

“I’m not busy,” Derek laughs. “I’ll go. Just text me the details.”

“Thank you!” Stiles has the urge to hug him, but he reels that in. They’re not there. Not anymore at least.

“Now, did you do the research for your project?”

And this time, Stiles is not grateful for the subject change.

Derek helps Stiles set up a game plan and gives Stiles deadlines on when certain things should be done. It’s surprisingly helpful. Derek even steals Stiles’ phone and puts calendar reminders of the deadlines. Stiles almost can’t believe how helpful Derek is being. 

“You know,” Stiles starts and then stops, thinking about whether or not he should really say anything or not.

“Know what?” Derek questions curiously.

“I’m glad Finstock told you to be my tutor,” Stiles finishes in a mumble.

Derek smiles. “Yeah, me too. I missed you, Stiles.”

Stiles looks up, surprised. “You did?”

Derek laughs and nods. “Yeah, I did. It’s been a long three and a half years without you.”

“I missed you too,” Stiles admits. “Maybe we can be friends again?”

Something lights up in Derek’s eyes while he nods. “Yeah, that’d be really great.”

“We’ll start with bowling,” Stiles laughs.

“Bowling sounds great.”

The next day at school, Stiles discusses what’s new in his life with Scott. 

“Your friends again?” Scott asks. “Just like that?”

Stiles shrugs while drinking his milk. “Just like that.”

“So speaking of Derek,” Scott says, looking around the cafeteria dramatically. “Where is he? Is he sick? Does that mean he’s not coming tomorrow?” Scott almost sounds hopeful? As in he is hoping that his best friend endures a social outing with as much awkwardness as possible?

“Full moon was last night,” Stiles explains. “His family is super into astronomy so they make it a big family thing to look at the stars and the moon every full moon. They end up staying up all night so the kids don’t go to school the next day.”

“That’s weird.”

“Right? I thought so too. But you get used to it.” Not that Stiles hasn’t questioned it before because he definitely has, but that resulted in the ending of a friendship, so Stiles is done questioning Derek’s family weird quirks. Maybe. Stiles’ curiosity knows no bounds.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> next chapter WILL be posted on Monday...or Tuesday okay i'm sorry my life has been a little wild lately and it's hard to keep days straight, but the next chapter is one of my favorites. it was so much fun to write and i hope it's just as fun to read! stay tuned, there's more coming!!


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay i know this is a whole week late, and i'm so sorry, but i'm going to post 2 chapters today to make up for it!

Stiles can’t explain the thrill of happiness that runs through him when he sees Derek waiting outside the bowling alley for them. He tries to hide his smile, but man, is he glad to see Derek, the dude who is gonna make this night so much less awkward for Stiles. 

Scott and Stiles walk up to Derek, greeting him as they get close enough. “Glad you made it!” Stiles says.

Derek ducks his head. 

“How was the full moon thing?” Scott asks as they wait for Allison, Lydia, and Jackson.

Derek’s eyes widen slightly, and he looks almost shocked. He glances at Stiles, so Stiles jumps in.

“I told him how your family is super into astronomy, especially the full moon,” Stiles explains.

Everything in Derek relaxes, which is weird. He’s hiding something. Maybe not what Stiles thought it was when he was thirteen, but Derek is definitely hiding something.

“Yeah, it was good,” Derek mumbles with a shrug. “Laura was even down for it, and she hasn’t been for a couple months since school is really busy.”

Stiles smiles. “Good! It must’ve been great for her to be there.”

Derek nods. “When one of us is missing, it just doesn’t feel quite right.”

For a moment, Stiles frowns. He wishes he had that. He wishes he had a family that was close like that. Sure, he loves his dad, and his dad undoubtedly loves him, but they can go days without seeing each other and be fine. For a few years, Stiles had that almost with the Hale’s. Talia and Bruce, Derek’s parents, were always loving and kind to Stiles, always welcoming him in their home. Derek’s siblings, Laura, Cora, and Aaron, were always quick to joke around and play with Stiles as if he was one of them. Then suddenly, he wasn’t.

Something touches Stiles’ arm, and he looks to see Derek’s hand on his forearm. He lifts his head to look into Derek’s face.

“You okay?” Derek asks.

“Reminiscing,” Stiles answers with a half smile.

Derek nods, accepting the answer and taking back his hand. “I think they’re here,” he says, looking towards the entrance of the parking lot.

When Stiles turns his head, he sees Jackson’s Porsche driving into the parking lot. “How did you - ” Stiles stops himself when he sees Derek’s smug face. “I forgot about your super hearing.”

Derek laughs, but it sounds a little forced. Stiles wants to question it, but then Scott is grabbing the top of Stiles’ arm and shaking him.

“Yo,” Stiles laughs, putting a hand on Scott’s wrist. “It’s okay. Relax.”

Scott is almost bouncing in excitement. “I bet she looks really beautiful tonight like she always does.”

“Be sure to tell her that,” Stiles reminds him. “Compliments on dates are always good.”

“Wait, this is a date?” Derek asks.

“Here she comes!” Scott practically yells. 

Stiles turns his head to watch Allison and Lydia walk towards them. Jackson is trailing behind, and even from across the parking lot, Stiles can tell he doesn’t look happy to be here. It makes Stiles want to laugh, but he doesn’t because he’s a good person. Most of the time.

Allison picks up her pace, the curls of her hair bouncing with each step. She is already smiling directly at Scott. “Hi!” she says once she is close enough. 

Scott’s answering smile is blinding. “Hi, you look beautiful tonight like you always do.”

She smiles and looks down, her cheeks turning pink. Objectively, she’s really beautiful, Scott’s right. 

Then Lydia comes strolling up, looking at Derek with a confused frown. “What is he doing here?”

Stiles slings an arm around Derek’s shoulders, making him seem more part of the group. “He’s with me.”

Lydia shrugs, accepting the answer and looks behind her. “Come on, Jackson! I want to wipe the floor with everyone’s asses!”

Derek snorts, making Lydia turn her laser sharp gaze back on him. “You don’t think I could do it?” she asks, her eyebrows raised high. She looks ready to fight with her hands on her hips. 

“No,” Derek answers, and Stiles has to take a step away from him to look at him more clearly. 

“No?” Lydia and Stiles ask at the same time. 

Stiles is shocked that the power radiating from Lydia doesn’t scare Derek even a little, but then again, he grew up with Laura and Cora, who both emanate so much power, especially Laura.

“I mean, I guess we’ll see, but I’m really good at bowling,” Derek tells her.

“So am I,” she says slowly.

Derek puts his hand out. “May the best bowler win.”

She narrows her eyes at his hand, but then takes it, shaking it fiercely.

That’s when Jackson finally shows up, hands in his pockets. “What’s going on?” he asks, looking at Derek and Lydia’s hands.

Derek takes his hand back. “Mutual respect for competition,” he answers.

Jackson rolls his eyes. “Enough of that shit. I want nachos.”

“Cheers to that!” Stiles yells, and they all shuffle inside.

The bowling alley is pretty busy, but they’re able to secure themselves a lane. Scott pays for Allison and himself while Jackson pays for Lydia and himself, so when Derek takes his wallet out, Stiles puts a hand on his wrist.

“I’ve got this,” Stiles says, reaching behind with his other hand to grab his wallet. “My treat as thanks for coming out.”

If Stiles didn’t know any better, he’d think that Derek is blushing, but well. He isn’t. He can’t be, so Stiles moves on to paying. 

“You sure?” Derek asks.

“Yeah, totally,” Stiles answers. He has some extra spending money from mowing neighbors’ lawns last summer and already has budgeted out the money he needs for car insurance and gas, so he’s good. 

Once they all have their shoes, they go to their lane and put down their stuff. The boys are designated to go grab drinks and food for everyone, so they do. Scott and Jackson manage to get into a semi cordial conversation about lacrosse while Stiles notices that Derek looks a little lost.

“You good?” Stiles asks.

Derek nods. “It’s just been awhile since I’ve been out with friends. My friends don’t get out much. We mostly just hangout at my house.”

“Gotcha,” Stiles says, feeling a little jealous that Derek has close enough friends to bring to his house. “Who are your friends?”

“Well, you probably know Isaac, he’s on the lacrosse team,” Derek tells him, and they pause their conversation to order food. Stiles pays again, which Derek tries to fight him on, but eventually he lets Stiles pay. 

“Lahey, right?” Stiles asks as they wait for their food.

“Yeah,” Derek says with a smile. “And then there’s Erica and Boyd.”

Stiles thinks for a moment and then shakes his head. “I can’t picture their faces.”

“I’ll point them out Monday,” Derek tells him.

“Cool.” Stiles smiles, remembering how much he missed this, missed Derek. 

They all get the food and drinks, carrying them back to the table that’s in their lane. Derek excuses himself to go find the perfect ball, and Stiles is slightly surprised that Derek doesn’t have his own.

As much as he wants to dig into his curly fries and hot dog, Stiles waits until Derek gets back. While he waits, he watches Scott inch closer to Allison on the bench, looking happier than Stiles has ever seen him. Allison doesn’t look too upset to be there either. Lydia is on Allison’s other side with Jackson next to her. They look like they’re arguing, but there’s a small smile on Lydia’s lips, so Stiles doesn’t think too much of it.

While he watches them, he gets a pang of longing. He wants something like that, or someone like that. 

He gets out of his thoughts when Derek sits down next to him, smiling. “Found my usual ball,” Derek tells him.

Stiles can’t help but laugh. “You have a usual?”

Derek nods. “Of course.” And there isn’t an ounce of irony in his voice.

Stiles is just smiling at him, shaking his head in amazement. “Of course.”

“So are we going to start or what?” Lydia asks loudly, standing up to start putting in people’s names. She puts everyone’s first name in except Stiles’. For him, she puts Stilinski. Probably because that’s the only way Jackson ever refers to him.

Of course, Lydia is first up with Derek right after her. She gets a spare and looks absolutely pissed about it while Derek looks smug when he scores a strike. That’s when Lydia looks murderous.

When it’s Scott’s turn, he admits he hasn’t been bowling in almost ten years, his face red as he does. Allison steps up to him and shows him how to hold the ball and the way he should throw it. It’s all very cute.

“Gross, right?” Stiles comments to Derek.

“Disgusting,” Derek laughs.

Stiles laughs with him, and in that moment, he doesn’t feel so alone.

As the night goes on, Lydia and Derek end up just a few points off from each other, Derek in the lead. They’re all talking with each other as if they’re friends, heckling at whoever is up bowling, but it’s all in good fun, and no one feels singled out. It’s surprisingly fun.

Somehow, they get on the topic of weird tricks they can all do. Allison is double jointed. Lydia can make weird shapes with her tongue. Jackson has nothing, but Stiles remembers something.

“Derek can catch anything with his mouth if you throw it at him!” he excitedly says.

Lydia looks at Derek, interested. “Well, let’s see this trick, Derek.”

Derek looks at Stiles looking a little peeved. 

“Dude, it’s cool,” Stiles tells him. “And super impressive. Let’s show them. You can still do it, right?”

Derek nods and looks a little less angry. He gets up and sits next to Lydia on the bench across from where he and Stiles are sitting. “Okay, I’m ready.”

Stiles grabs a fry and tosses it towards Derek, who easily catches it in his mouth. “See!” Stiles says with a big smile on his face. 

Lydia shakes her head. “A fry is easy.”

“What do you suggest?” Derek asks, his competitive side coming out.

She surveys what’s left of their food and thinks for a moment. “I want you to catch a whole hot dog.”

Stiles laughs because he thinks she’s joking, but then stops laughing when he sees Lydia and Derek’s very serious faces. 

“Let’s do it,” Derek says confidently. They go and buy another hot dog, putting nothing on it. Stiles is still in confused shock when they get back, holding the hot dog. 

“You guys can’t be serious,” he says, but he knows they are. They wouldn’t have bought a hot dog otherwise.

“I’ll throw it,” Lydia tells them then instructs Derek on where to stand. He’s almost in someone else’s lane while she is diagonally across from him near the rack of bowling balls.

Strangely enough, Stiles is nervous. There’s a chance Derek won’t catch it, and then it’ll make a huge mess that Stiles will feel really bad about being apart of as he watches an employee clean it up. No, Stiles will clean it up. That’s the right thing to do. 

As he keeps picturing all the ways that this could fail, Stiles almost misses it when Lydia throws the hot dog. Everything feels like it’s in slow motion as Stiles’ eyes move with the trajectory of the hot dog. Logically, Stiles knows this only takes a few seconds, but it honestly feels like hours until the hot dog reaches its target.

In shock, Stiles stands up and throws both hands in the air as he shouts in excitement.

Derek caught the hot dog.

He actually caught it. In his mouth.

Everyone is cheering, and even Lydia looks pleased even though she and Derek are tied for winning one game each. 

Stiles runs over and throws himself at Derek, who catches him easily as he is chewing the hot dog. They wrap their arms around each other, laughing. 

“That was awesome!” Stiles yells.

Derek is trying not to laugh as he is chewing, but there’s a wide, proud smile on his face that Stiles doesn’t even register as gross. “This was awesome.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this was a fun chapter to write i hope it's a fun chapter to read!


	7. Chapter 7

It’s really easy to fall back into a friendship with Derek. They’re hanging out again outside of just doing Stiles’ project. They don’t hang out at school because they have different friend groups, but outside of school, they’re friends again. There are texts to prove it.

Speaking of Stiles’ project, he turned it in last Friday right before the weekend. Derek has spent the last two days reassuring Stiles that the project was well researched, and the board looked professional. That doesn’t stop Stiles’ constant worrying that it’s not good enough. He can’t fail his senior year. His dad would be so disappointed.

“Stilinski!” Finstock yells after the last bell of the day. 

Stiles quickly gets his stuff together and goes up to Coach’s desk, looking over his shoulder at Derek standing at the door. He nods that it’s okay for Derek to go. This is Stiles’ grade after all. If he fails, it’s only his fault.

“Can you pinch me?” Coach asks, holding his arm out.

“Excuse me?” Stiles is taken aback and isn’t sure he heard correctly.

Coach’s arm is still in front of Stiles. “Pinch me,” he demands.

Stiles slowly raises his hand and softly pinches his teacher. He still isn’t sure what’s going on.

Coach rolls his eyes, but takes his arm away. “I must be dreaming because your project earned an A.”

“An A?” Stiles repeats, his eyebrows raising in surprise. “Are you sure?”

“I’m not sure,” Finstock says. “So you better take this board from me and hope I don’t change my mind before you’re out of my sight.”

Stiles doesn’t think twice before grabbing his board from behind Finstock’s desk and then runs out of the classroom. In his rush, he doesn’t see Derek right outside the door and literally runs right into him.

Derek’s hands grab Stiles’ elbows, holding him steady so Stiles doesn’t fall back. They’re both laughing.

Stiles shakes his head, still laughing, and takes a step back. “I’m sorry.”

“No problem,” Derek easily says. “Did you pass?”

Stiles smiles widely. “A!” 

“You got an A?” Derek asks in surprise, looking like Stiles must have when Coach told him the good news.

Stiles nods his head quickly. “All because of you.”

Derek shakes his head. “You did the work, Stiles. I just offered encouragement. I told you, you’re smart.”

Stiles isn’t sure how to feel about the compliment because his grades definitely say differently. “Still...thanks, Derek.”

“No problem.”

When Stiles gets home after practice that day, his dad is already home, so he tells him about his extra credit project.

“Way to go, Stiles!” his dad says enthusiastically and gives him a hug. “Let’s celebrate. What do you want for dinner?”

Stiles still doesn’t have the heart to tell his dad that he is still failing two other classes. Instead, he answers his dad’s question. “Take out from that diner that has the curly fries!”

“You got it.” 

Stiles still remembers the first time they went to this diner. It opened when Stiles was twelve, but they didn’t try it until after one of his mom’s doctor appointments that didn’t go so well.

“You may need to consider the options,” the doctor said after listening to the symptoms Stiles’ dad described.

“What options?” Stiles’ dad almost yelled, and Stiles knew he was getting angry. His mom reached a hand out to her husband, but he flinched away. 

“She needs to be put into a home for...” The doctor paused, not finishing his sentence as he looked at Stiles’ dad with a sad look.

“For?” Stiles’ dad demanded to know. It’s where Stiles got his insatiable curiosity from. They both have to know everything they can about the situations they’re in.

The doctor looked down and took a breath before looking back up and staring at Stiles’ dad. “For people with behavioral health problems.”

“She’s not crazy! There’s something else wrong!” Stiles’ dad started pacing at this point, refusing to look at anyone but the doctor. He paced for a moment and then stared at the doctor, opening his mouth to say something and then looked away to start walking around the small office again.

Stiles went up to his mom and grabbed her hand because she looked like she was about to cry. “It’s okay, Mom,” he whispered to her.

She squeezed his hand. “I’m supposed to be comforting you,” she whispered back with a sad smile.

He leaned his head on her shoulder, wondering if his mom was really going crazy or if his dad was right. There was something else wrong with her.

After the appointment, Stiles’ mom begged to do something fun, so they went to try the new diner, and she demanded everyone got whatever they wanted plus a milkshake. They ended the meal so full that they each felt like throwing up, but it was fun. It was a good memory, and Stiles and his dad still go there, eating as much as they possibly can each time.

“Stiles?” His dad’s voice brings him back to the present where Stiles is absentmindedly shoving fries in his face.

“Yeah?” Stiles says around the fries in his mouth. 

“You good?” his dad asks, looking concerned, and wow, people keep giving him that look. Should Stiles be concerned about himself as well?

Stiles nods. “Sorry, just thinking about what milkshake I’m gonna order. I was thinking the mint Oreo one. What about you?”

His dad laughs. “Is that even a question? Strawberry, of course.”

Stiles laughs too because it’s an inside joke between them. They always used to get strawberry shakes because his mom  _ hated _ strawberry anything, and she was notorious for stealing some of their shakes because she wanted to try them all. She was the only one of them that could easily finish all her food and her shake while still having room for their shakes too. 

“I miss her,” Stiles whispers.

His dad nods, picking at the bun of his burger and refusing to look up at Stiles. “Every day.”


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> look at that! it's monday and i'm posting a chapter. wow it's like i'm finally organized!

“So you and Derek, huh?” Scott says while they’re in the cafeteria eating lunch.

Stiles looks up from his food and blinks a few times. “What about us?”

Scott narrows his eyes suspiciously. “Stiles, you already came out as bi to me. You don’t have to hide anything. You’re my best friend no matter what. You know that, right?”

Stiles frowns, tilting his head slightly in confusion. “Um yeah. I do know that. What am I hiding from you?”

With a big sigh, Scott rolls his eyes. So dramatic. “That you and Derek are dating.”

Stiles starts coughing because he choked on his own spit. “We’re what now?”

“You know I’m okay with that,” Scott continues. “Yeah, you and Derek had a falling out, but you guys got over it, and that’s rad. So you don’t have to hide that you’re dating Derek.”

“I’m, uh, not dating Derek,” Stiles says slowly, still a little confused as to how his best friend got to this conclusion.

“You sure?” Scott asks, and now he looks confused.

“Pretty sure, yeah,” Stiles tells him. “I think I would know if I was lucky enough to be dating Derek.”

“So you’re into him?”

“No,” Stiles immediately says. “I’m just saying anyone would be lucky to date him.”

Scott’s eyes are narrowed again in suspicion as if he sees through Stiles, but there’s nothing to see here. “Sure. That’s what you’re saying.”

“Anyway, where’s your girlfriend?” Stiles asks. “Why aren’t you bugging her?”

“She said that we need to spend time with our friends and not just each other,” Scott relays sadly. 

“Why don’t we all just sit together?” Stiles wonders. “We seemed to do okay the other weekend at bowling.”

Scott shrugs, taking a drink of his water bottle. “Maybe Jackson refuses to be seen with us?”

“That could definitely be it,” Stiles says with a nod. “Either way, Allison is right.”

“She’s always right,” Scott says sincerely with wide, adoring eyes. “She’s so smart and logical and beautiful.”

Stiles nods, agreeing with all of the above.

Scott shakes his head to get back into the present. “Anyway, how are you doing on that English paper due Friday?”

Stiles’ only answer is to laugh hysterically.

“You haven’t started it?” Scott asks.

Stiles shakes his head. “No, have you?”

Scott shrugs. “I wrote the intro.”

“That’s something,” Stiles commends. “I’ll start soon.” And he really means it, but then it’s Thursday night and Stiles is staring at a blank document again.

He decides to text Derek.

**Stiles: I’m fucked**

He drums his fingers on the desk as he tries to come up with something to write about the book he read for class. He did actually read it, which is surprising, but he suddenly remembers nothing about what he read. 

**Derek: Uh, why?**

Stiles snorts, staring at the fact that Derek used a comma in his text. A  _ comma _ .

**Stiles: English paper due tomorrow. Haven’t started**

**Derek: STILES!**

He feels a  _ little _ bad about it now that he stares at Derek’s text. He should’ve started sooner. He should’ve written a little bit each day so he would have been done tonight. But he didn’t do that and stewing in the regret of what he didn’t do isn’t going to help.

**Stiles: Yeah I know okay? I need some sort of motivation...**

**Derek: Finish your paper and then you can go to sleep?**

**Stiles: that’s boring**

**Derek: I don’t know what you want me to do**

**Stiles: nothing it’s not your problem**

Stiles sighs and once again finds his forehead against the desk. Why can’t he just  _ do it _ ? 

**Derek: You’re incredibly smart, Stiles. You can do this.**

The text is actually very comforting and reassuring. Derek has read Stiles’ work before and has firsthand experience, and he doesn’t lie to Stiles. 

Surprisingly, he starts writing and doesn’t stop for two hours when he’s done. It may be crap (again), but at least it’s done before midnight too. 

**Stiles: You still up?**

Derek’s response is almost immediate.

**Derek: Yeah, what’s up?**

**Stiles: Want to edit my english paper for me? Please?**

**Derek: Only because you said please.**

Stiles gets Derek’s email and sends over his email. He is impatient to get Derek’s response, but to occupy himself, he plays games on his phone, pretending that he isn’t waiting for something. Then his phone starts ringing with Derek’s name written across his screen. 

“Yo,” Stiles answers, slightly confused.

“So,” Derek starts.

“Tell me you hated it. It’s okay.” Stiles sighs, knowing his paper is crap. They always are.

“No,” Derek is quick to say. “I didn’t hate it. It’s not bad. I edited here and there and made a few comments where you seem to go off track, but if you clean it up a bit, I can see you getting a good grade, Stiles.”

“Seriously?” Stiles asks, surprised. “It’s not absolute crap?”

Derek laughs quietly probably because everyone in his house is asleep. “It’s not. You’ve got a solid rough draft. But hurry and finish it so you get some sleep tonight.”

Stiles rolls his eyes, knowing full well Derek can’t see them.

“I can hear you rolling your eyes,” Derek says, his voice hard, but Stiles can tell he’s smiling.

“Yeah, yeah, whatever. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“See you tomorrow. Goodnight, Stiles.”

“‘Night, Der.” Then Stiles hangs up and gets started on editing his paper, reading through Derek’s comments that are incredibly insightful and helpful. By the time he is done, Stiles thinks that the paper isn’t half bad, so he prints it out and puts it in his backpack for tomorrow before passing out in his bed, fully clothed.

“You look tired,” Scott comments.

Stiles is pressed up against his locker, eyes fluttering close every few seconds. “Thanks, buddy.”

“No problem, bro,” Scott tells him, slamming his locker and making Stiles jump.

Stiles blinks a few times, trying to wake up. “I need at least ten tons of coffee.”

Scott smirks and nods. “Look behind you.”

Stiles turns around and sees Derek holding two cups of coffee. He holds one out to Stiles.

“Figured you’d be tired.”

Everything gets a little blurry as Stiles’ eyes tear up. He can’t believe Derek did this, and it might be just because he’s tired, but he’s pretty sure he loves Derek with his whole heart. “Thank you,” Stiles says before rubbing his eyes. Then he reaches out and takes the coffee. 

“I asked Scott how you like it, so it should be good,” Derek says, ducking his head like he’s embarrassed, and Stiles can’t believe how cute he is.

Stiles takes a sip and practically moans because it’s so good. “It’s perfect. You’re perfect. Thank you.”

Derek’s ears turn red as he shrugs his shoulders. “Don’t mention it.” Then he turns away and hurries down the hallway.

Stiles looks down at the coffee in his hand and over at Scott. “Did that just happen?”

“You sure you’re not dating?” Scott asks.

Stiles frowns as he thinks. “Yes...?”

Scott nods and starts walking to class as the bell rings. “You coming?”

Stiles scrambles to follow his best friend to their first class where he turns in his paper. Sitting in his desk, he sighs, feeling very, very content.


	9. Chapter 9

“Hey, Scott!” Stiles calls out from downstairs in his house. Scott is upstairs playing video games because it’s their bro night. “What kind of....” He can’t think of the word. Fuck what is it. “What kind of...” He stops again because  _ what is the word _ . 

“What kind of what?” Scott calls down, leaning over the railing to peer down at Stiles. 

“You know. The thing I came down for.” He’s trying to explain the best he can, but his mind is just blank. 

“Soda?” Scott asks. “Mountain Dew, dude. How could you forget our gaming drink?”

Stiles closes his eyes and takes a deep breath. After opening his eyes, he says, “Got it! Be up in a second.”

He goes to the kitchen, but pauses as he looks around. How could he have forgotten the word for soda? He knows that word. He drinks soda almost on a daily basis. How did he forget?

All of this reminds him of his mom when she was just starting to get sick. She’d be stirring up cookie dough and would look at Stiles with a frown.

“I’m forgetting something,” she said and then looked down at the counter, her eyes searching for something. “It’s white and makes the cookies do something. What does it do?”

“Sugar?” Stiles asked. He wasn’t up to speed on baking quite yet, but he knew that was one of the ingredients.

She shook her head. “No, it’s fine.” She wiped her thumb on her fingers like she was trying to show Stiles how fine it was. “I already put in sugar. It’s butter, eggs, vanilla, sugar, and then what?” She bit her lip, turning around in the kitchen. 

Stiles had never seen his mom look uneasy in the kitchen before. She was never unsure about cooking or baking. She had always had a smile on her face as she was in the kitchen. It was her favorite. She said it helped clear her brain and gave her something to do with her hands that were always moving.

“Flour?” Stiles suggested.

She spun around to look at him, a smile lighting her face. “Flour!” she exclaimed. “That’s exactly what I was looking for, sweetie. Thank you! I don’t know what I would do without you and your dad.”

She leaned over and kissed his forehead, keeping her hands away from him because they were covered in cookie dough. 

Later, Stiles and his dad learned that losing words was one of her first symptoms. 

Stiles blinks at the cups of soda in his hand. Is that...no. But maybe? Is that what’s been going on with him? Why his brain has been so foggy the last few years? Is that why he’s barely scraping by in high school?

He can feel the color drain out of his face as the panic sets in. No. It can’t be. That can’t be happening to him. It can’t. His dad can’t go through that again. Stiles can’t go through that again.

“Stiles!” Scott shouts. “What’s taking so long?”

Stiles grabs the cup and heads towards the stairs. That’s not what is happening to him, but if it is...he’ll go to the doctor. Wait he can’t. He’s only seventeen. His dad would see any appointments he makes and results from tests they do. His birthday is in a month. He can wait until then. He can. 

The next day, Stiles realizes something.

**Stiles: We’re friends, right?**

He waits around for a response, but gets bored, so he turns to video games since he has nothing due tomorrow at school. For once. It’s a nice, relieving break.

He finally gets a text back ten minutes later.

**Derek: Uh, yeah?**

**Stiles: Then why haven’t I been over to your house yet? I miss your family**

**Derek: You can come over now if you want. We’re not really doing much today.**

**Stiles: Sounds awesome! See you in 20**

Stiles rushes to save and turn off his game and then get fully dressed with shoes. Once he’s ready, he grabs his keys and runs out the door. On his way to his car, he texts his dad really quick to let him know where he’ll be if he comes home to find Stiles still gone. 

He hasn’t ever made this drive himself, but he remembers the way vividly. He turns right at the end of his street to the main road then turns left onto a dirt road that leads into the forest. That’s when things get a  _ little _ tricky, but he finds his way. The scenery has changed slightly since he was last here, but it all looks very familiar. His parents used to make this drive multiple times a week so Stiles could see the Hales. 

Finally, he pulls up to a huge house that holds the Hale family. He parks next to Derek’s Camaro and jumps out. They must have heard his Jeep - it is pretty loud - because there are people coming out of the house in a rush with smiles on their faces. He immediately recognizes Talia and Bruce, and they don’t look like they’ve aged a day. 

Next, he sees Laura, who definitely looks more mature, but she has a wide smile on her face as her hair bounces up and down while she runs towards him.

After that is Cora, who looks much older than Stiles remembers. She must have been ten the last time he saw her, which means she should be a freshman now. Stiles wonders why he hasn’t seen her around school. She looks happy to see him, but she’s much more subdued than Laura is.

Then it’s Aaron, who is about a year and a half younger than Stiles and Derek, and looks like he is definitely hitting his teenage angst stage. He doesn’t look unhappy to see Stiles. In fact, it looks a lot like he’s checking Stiles out? Maybe? But Stiles has definitely seen him passing by in the halls at school, but he’s been too scared to reach out and talk to him before he and Derek became friends.

Lastly, Derek comes strolling out of the house, looking annoyed, but that isn’t really different compared to any other time he and Derek interact. Then he meets Stiles’ eye and smiles, which makes Stiles feel a little better and maybe a little breathless, but who’s checking?

Laura is the first to reach him because she is running at full speed. She barrels into him, attacking him with a hug. With the force of her attack, Stiles starts falling towards the ground, but she turns them so that she takes the brunt of the fall to the ground. She has always been the stronger of the two of them.

“Stiles!” she practically yells in excitement right into his ear, but he’s laughing so it doesn’t matter. She’s holding him tightly around his neck as he has his arms wrapped around her waist. “I missed you!”

“I missed you!” he tells her sincerely, hugging her closer. 

“Hey, it’s my turn!” Cora says, nudging at Laura’s shoe.

“Give me a minute!” Laura says, burying her face into Stiles’ neck. He forgot how intimate the Hales hugs were. They’re all really good huggers. 

Finally, she releases him and jumps up, holding a hand out to help Stiles up. He gratefully takes the hand and lets her yank him up. Then Cora is wrapped around him, and he can’t help but laugh again. She comes up to his chest, and Stiles wonders how much taller she’s going to get. Laura is just a few inches shy of Stiles’ height.

“It’s been forever!” she mumbles into his chest.

“It really has been,” he sighs, looking over at Derek accusingly. “One of your big brothers is a poopyhead.”

“Not me!” Aaron calls out, holding his hands up in defense.

Cora leans back to look up at Stiles’ face. “I’m fourteen now. You can use harsher words than poopyhead. We all know Derek’s an asshole.”

“Cora!” Talia reprimands. 

Cora ducks her head and steps out of Stiles’ arms. “I’m sorry, but it’s true.”

“It is,” Laura says quickly to back up her little sister.

“It is,” Derek admits with a shrug.

Aaron is next with the hug, but he keeps it pretty short, smacking Stiles on the back once. “Good to see you.”

“You too!” Stiles says with a smile then narrows his eyes to focus better on Aaron’s chin. “Do I see the hint of facial hair on your chin?” He reaches to touch it, but Aaron grabs his hand with a laugh.

“I’d say takes one to know one, but it looks like you can’t even grow facial hair still,” Aaron comments.

“Aaron!” Derek says, coming up behind him and smacking the back of his head.

Aaron drops Stiles’ hand and rubs the back of his head. “Jeez, bro. Don’t get all uppity with me.”

“Okay, okay,” Talia says, coming between them and separating them. “It’s my turn to hug Stiles and welcome him back to our home.” She wraps her arms around him, and even though he’s taller than she is now, she still brings his head down to her shoulder with a comforting hand on the back of his head. It’s such a motherly hug, and he hasn’t gotten that in so long.

He can feel himself start to tear up as he hugs Talia back tightly. “I missed you,” he mumbles to her shoulder.

She runs her hand through his hair. “I missed you, dear.” They stay together for a moment longer before leaning back. “You grew your hair out. It suits you.” She runs a hand through it and then rests her hand on his cheek. She smiles at him softly, her eyes glowing. She pats him once before taking her hand back.

“Stiles!” Bruce calls out, stepping closer. He hugs Stiles tightly for a moment, practically lifting him off the ground. He puts Stiles down and then pats his back. “Glad to see you back here!”

“Good to be back!” Stiles tells him with a wide smile. 

Derek takes a step closer and then wraps his arms around Stiles. “Sorry it took so long to get you back here.”

Stiles pats his back before pulling back. “It’s okay.” And surprisingly, he means it. 

“Well, come on in!” Bruce says, waving to the house as he walks backwards towards it. Everyone follows him inside, and wow, things inside have not changed a bit. There are a few more pictures up on the wall, but other than that, everything is the same. The big, dark green couch is still the same, and Stiles knows that sitting on it means he’ll never get back up because it’s so comfy. Then Bruce’s armchair is to the side that matches the couch, but Stiles doesn’t know exactly how comfy it is. Only Bruce and Talia are allowed on the armchair. 

But this is just the living room. Stiles knows the kitchen is ginormous and always made his mom go bug eye because she was so enthralled with it. He wonders if it looks the same as well. He assumes so. It’s only been four years. 

Stiles sits in the middle on the couch and immediately he has the Hale sisters on either side of him. They both curl up into his sides, and he laughs. “Wow, it’s like nothing has changed,” he says.

Laura lays her head on his shoulder as Cora does the same. “Nope. We still love you here as if you’re a Hale.”

Stiles wraps his arms around them, leaning his head on top of Laura’s. “It’s like I never left.”

Derek is standing in front of Stiles with a raised eyebrow. “Make yourself at home,” he jokes.

“Not sure I feel comfortable enough to do so.” Stiles laughs, winking at Derek. 

Derek rolls his eyes and sits on the other side of Laura. They begin to catch up, Laura telling him about how college is going.

“It’s  _ hard _ ,” Laura complains.

“That’s what she said,” Stiles immediately says.

She smacks his shoulder softly, but she’s laughing. “Or he or they,” Laura says. “We’re very inclusive in this household.”

He nods. “Yes, that’s good.”

“Anyway. College. It’s harder and easier than high school. The work is harder, but the professors are all really nice and easy going.” She continues on, telling him about how keeping in contact with your professors and getting to know them is super important.

“So what’s your major?” Stiles asks.

She sighs, leaning her head back on the couch. “I don’t know,” she whines. “People keep asking, and I’m hoping one day I’ll have an answer. Today is not it, though.”

Stiles shrugs. “It’s cool. I have no idea what I’m going to study or if I’m gonna go to college.”

“College is good,” Derek says, and Stiles prepares himself for a speech on how he should go to college, but he doesn’t get that. “But...college isn’t for everyone. I think you’d do well in college if you decided to go, but you could do well without it too.”

“Thanks,” Stiles says, looking at him with a small smile. Then he turns to Cora. “What have you been up to? Are you in high school yet? I haven’t seen you around.”

“I’m in high school,” Cora tells him. “I just hide a lot. There’s a lot of people, and Derek and Aaron have their own friends, so I’m not sure who to hang out with.”

“You can always hang out with me and my buddy, Scott!” Stiles tells her. “I won’t be embarrassed to have you around.”

The answering smile he gets is almost blinding, and he can’t help but smile back at Cora. “Thanks, Stiles.”

“Anytime.” And he really means it. They haven’t talked in four years, but he still loves this family as if they were his own. 


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HAPPY MONDAY!!!!

Stiles ends up spending the rest of the day at the Hale house, having dinner with them as well. They all give him a long hug goodbye when it’s time for him to leave, but they let Derek walk him out. 

“Thanks for letting me come over,” Stiles says once they’re outside.

Derek leans against the closed door and shakes his head. “As if I could stop you from doing anything you want.”

“True,” Stiles agrees. “But it still. It was really nice to see them again.”

“You’re going to have to come over more often now,” Derek laughs. “They’ll be demanding it. And you gave Laura your number. She will be commandeering your attention as often as you’ll let her.”

Stiles nods, knowing Derek is right. “I don’t think I have a problem with that, though.”

Derek smiles, and there’s something sparkling in his eyes that makes Stiles want to take a step closer. “They love you,” Derek says softly.

“I love them,” Stiles is quick to say. “Your family is awesome, but you’re awesome too.”

Derek shakes his head. “I think they got all the personality.”

Stiles rolls his eyes. “I mean it. You’re pretty awesome too, Derek. Just in a more subtle way.” 

“Thanks,” Derek says, but it doesn’t sound like he believes Stiles. Well, Stiles will just have to keep proving it to Derek then.

“I’ll see you tomorrow at school,” Stiles tells him, taking a step back towards his car.

Derek nods. “See you tomorrow.” He waves and watches Stiles get into his car before heading inside.

Once he’s inside, Stiles exhales slowly. Something about being alone with Derek in close proximity makes him shaky and nervous. Not that he isn’t comfortable around Derek because he  _ is _ . It’s just...being around Derek makes him want to do something. He just isn’t sure what that is.

The next day at school, Stiles turns around in class to Danny and asks, “Can I borrow a....” He stops. No, not again. He forgot another word? “You do the thing with it?” Stiles tries to explain. He motions what is supposed to be done with the object he’s forgetting the name of.

“To write?” Danny asks. “Do you want a pen?”

“No,” Stiles sighs, rubbing his forehead. “I need a uh... the other thing you write with.”

“A pencil?” Danny suggests.

Stiles nods. “Yes. Please. A pencil. Can I borrow one?”

Danny frowns at him, but digs through his backpack and then hands Stiles a pencil. “You okay, Stilinski?”

Stiles thanks him for the pencil and turns around, not answering his question because he isn’t sure what the answer is. Is he okay? 

The question plagues him for most of the day until lunch where he finds Cora sitting with Scott already. He greets her excitedly and sits down with his tray of chicken strips and fries. 

Scott looks up at Stiles with a smile. “Did you hear Cora is trying to convince Coach to let her audition for lacrosse?”

Stiles looks at her with a big smile. “That would be awesome! There’s a girl in my bio class who seems super interested in lacrosse. You should ask her to join you. Strength in numbers, right?”

Cora nods excitedly. “What’s her name?”

“Kira,” Stiles says slowly. “Pretty sure. She’s a junior I think. We don’t talk super often, but when we do talk, I can tell she’s pretty cool.” 

“Cool, I’ll definitely talk to her about it then!” Cora is almost buzzing with the excitement, and it makes Stiles smile. 

“Hey!” Allison says as she walks up to the table. She sets her tray down and sits next to Scott, kissing him on the cheek once she’s settled. She looks at Cora and then at Stiles and Scott with a raised eyebrow.

“This is Cora,” Stiles says, gesturing towards her. “Derek’s little sister.” 

Cora rolls her eyes. “You could’ve just stopped at my name.”

Stiles shrugs. “She’s gotta know that awesomeness runs in the family.”

Allison laughs and reaches a hand out. “Allison,” she says. “Nice to meet you, Cora.”

Cora eyes her hand for a moment and then shakes it. “Yeah, you too.”

They all talk throughout lunch about their classes and what homework they all have. Stiles mentally lists out everything he has, and it starts to overwhelm him. Knowing himself, though, he won’t start until the very last minute. He should try to get a little done each day. 

At practice later, Danny pulls Stiles aside and checks on him again. “You looked pretty freaked out this morning. Are you okay? Do you need someone to talk to?”

Stiles shakes his head. “I’m working on it, but thanks, Danny. You’re great.” He pats Danny’s shoulder and walks towards the other end of the field to his position before Coach can yell at him for socializing.

Practice wears Stiles out, and by the time he showers and gets dressed, he’s unsure of he can actually drive himself home. He sits in his car and debates the safety of driving home right now. His dad made sure to lecture him as often as possible that driving when exhausted is as bad as driving impaired, so he could call his dad to pick him up, but Stiles is pretty sure his dad is working. 

“Hello?” Derek answers the phone quickly.

“Hey, um, can you do me a favor?” Stiles asks.

“Yeah,” Derek quickly says, and the amount of trust in Stiles makes him want to cry.

Stiles sighs. “This is gonna sound stupid, but I need a ride home. I didn’t sleep well last night, and practice was brutal, so I’m exhausted, and I don’t think it’s safe for me to drive. I’d walk home, but again...I’m exhausted. If you can’t, it’s totally fine. I understand.”

“Are you still at school?” Derek asks.

“Yep.”

“I’ll be there in ten.” There’s rustling on the other end of the phone like Derek is moving around. “See you soon.”

“You’re a blessing and a godsend,” Stiles tells him in lieu of thank you.

Derek laughs and then hangs up, so Stiles leans back in his seat and closes his eyes. Next thing he knows, there’s a knock on his window that makes him jump.

“You scared me,” Stiles says as he opens his car door. He locks up his car after he grabs his backpack. 

Derek grabs Stiles’ backpack from him and then puts it in his car that’s parked right next to Stiles’ Jeep. “Just get in the car,” he says.

“So demanding,” Stiles comments, but follows Derek’s orders and gets into the car. He doesn’t think he has been in Derek’s car before. It’s very comfortable. The leather seats are really soft, and it’s really clean inside. Stiles’ car is never clean.

“Is your dad home?” Derek asks once he’s seated in the driver’s seat.

Stiles shakes his head. “I would’ve called him if he was.”

Derek nods, starting the car. “Do you want to grab dinner?” he asks, and his voice is kind of quiet like he’s nervous.

Stiles ignores it. “Yeah, dinner would be good. What are you thinking?”

“Burgers?” Derek suggests.

Stiles nods. “Sounds good. I’m okay with anywhere honestly.”

“You’ll eat anything,” Derek laughs, all signs of nervousness gone. 

Stiles can’t disagree with Derek because he’s right. Stiles will eat anything.

Derek drives to the diner that Stiles and his dad go to. At first, Stiles isn’t sure he wants to share this experience with anyone else besides his dad, but then he decides Derek is worth sharing this with. He’s still a little nervous as he walks into the diner. The hostess, Marci, greets him by name. 

“How’s it going, Stiles?” she asks.

“You know me, Marci,” Stiles laughs.

“Always fine, aren’t ya?” she says, rolling her eyes. “And who is this fine young man?”

“Derek.” Derek sticks his hand out. “I haven’t been here before, but I’ve heard it’s good.”

Marci nods, shaking Derek’s hand. “I’m biased, but I think it’s the best burger joint in Beacon Hills.”

“It  _ is _ the best burger joint in Beacon Hills,” Stiles says enthusiastically. “With the best shakes too!”

Derek smiles. “Can’t wait to try it.”

“Pick wherever you want to sit,” Marci says, gesturing to the relatively empty restaurant. “You just missed the rush.”

Stiles leads Derek to a booth near the back of the restaurant, near the kitchen. “I like to hear the cooks’ commentary,” Stiles tells Derek quietly. “Especially during a rush. It shouldn’t be too exciting right now, but it could be. Never know.”

They end up hearing about how Al, the main cook, is sleeping with Marci. Stiles gives her a high five when she stops by the table to get their drink order. 

“And what’s this for?” she asks, laughing. 

Stiles shrugs. “For being awesome.”

She laughs again. “I’ll take what I can get.”

Derek raises an eyebrow at him with a small smile. “This is how you get your kicks?”

Stiles nods immediately. “I’ll take what I can get, Derek. It’s been very boring without you and your family bugging me constantly.”

Speaking of, Stiles’ phone goes off at that minute, lighting up next to his hand on the table. The screen reads that it’s a text from Laura.

Derek glances at it and then rolls his eyes. “I told you she wouldn’t leave you alone.”

Stiles picks up his phone to look at the message and says, “And I told you it wouldn’t bother me.”

**Laura: Where is my little brother? I came home to tell him about my roommate drama, and he’s gone. What did you do with him?**

**Stiles: He’s mine now**

“What are you guys talking about?” Derek asks, looking a little worried.

“You,” Stiles answers honestly before reading Laura’s next text.

**Laura: That’s fine. Take him.**

Stiles laughs, and it makes Derek look even more worried, but he doesn’t say anything because Maci is delivering their drinks and taking their food order. Derek gets a cheeseburger with a side salad while Stiles gets a bacon cheeseburger, curly fries, and a cookies and cream milkshake.

“Not strawberry?” Marci asks, surprised.

Stiles smiles and shakes his head. “Not strawberry.”

When she walks away, Derek looks at him confused. “Do you usually get strawberry? I thought your favorite was cookies and cream.”

“It is,” Stiles tells him, taking a sip of his water. “It’s kind of a long story. I’ll tell you about it some other time.” Like maybe when he’s emotionally stable enough to talk about his mom. 

Derek nods, leaning back in his seat, making his foot press against Stiles’. Neither of them move their feet. Stiles finds it a little comforting, and for once, his anxiety settles a little. 

“So what are you and Laura talking about me?” Derek asks.

Stiles shrugs. “Your eyebrows,” he lies.

“Liar,” Derek immediately calls him out.

Stiles rolls his eyes because Derek is such an ass. “She asked where you are and I said you’re mine now.”

For a second, Stiles swears Derek’s eyes change to blue, but he looks away so quickly that Stiles isn’t sure. Stiles can see Derek’s cheeks and the tips of his ears turn red, which is honestly  _ so cute _ , which Stiles is sure to tell him.

“Shut up,” Derek mumbles, still looking away.

Stiles laughs and stays quiet until it seems that Derek calms down and looks forward again. “Did I embarrass you?” Stiles asks.

Derek snorts. “Everything about you is embarrassing.”

Stiles grabs an ice cube from his water and throws it at Derek, who catches it with his hand. “Rude,” Stiles grumbles. “I hate you.”

“Liar.”

They eat with a bit more banter between them, and then Derek tries to pay for Stiles.

“I can pay for myself,” Stiles tells him, trying to grab the check.

Derek shakes his head. “You paid for bowling and food the other weekend. It’s my turn.”

Stiles glares at him, but he has to admit Derek has a point. “Fine.” He takes one long more drink of his shake, finishing it up before he and Derek stand up. Derek leaves cash on the table, and Stiles trusts he leaves a generous tip.

Derek drives Stiles home and before he lets Stiles out, he asks, “Do you need a ride to school tomorrow?”

Stiles thinks about it because there’s no way he can get his Jeep tonight. “Yeah,” he nods. “That would be awesome thanks.”

“No problem,” Derek tells him, waving his hand. “I’ll see you in the morning.”

“Later,” Stiles says as he climbs out of the car. He waves once before turning around and walking to the front door.


	11. Chapter 11

Stiles wakes up late the next morning, forgetting he has a ride to school. When he looks at his phone, he has three texts from Derek.

**Derek: I’m here**

**Derek: Stiles?**

**Derek: Are you even awake?**

Stiles quickly texts back that he just woke up and to give him five minutes. He rushes through brushing his teeth and getting dressed, grabbing his backpack and goes. When he checks his phone after locking the front door, he sees it took him exactly five minutes.

“I think we should take a moment to commend me for taking exactly five minutes to get here,” Stiles says as he opens the door to Derek’s car. “My timing is on fucking point.”

He sits in the car and notices Derek is holding a cup out to him. Stiles blinks for a moment and then hesitantly grabs it. “Is this for me?” he asks.

Derek nods. “I figured you’d be tired this morning, and I know you. You wouldn’t wake up early enough to make yourself coffee. I also got you a bagel.”

Stiles blinks in confusion again. “A bagel?” he repeats slowly. “You got me a bagel?”

Derek shrugs and reaches to his right side by the door and pulls out a bagel, handing it to Stiles. “It’s not a big deal.”

Stiles is sure he is only blinking because there’s something in his eyes. He rubs at them to be sure and then takes a sip of the coffee. “Thank you,” he tells Derek, trying to convey how much this means to him.

“It’s not a big deal,” Derek repeats, shrugging and then putting the car in drive. 

Stiles disagrees, but he doesn’t say anything. He takes a bite of his bagel and is silent the rest of the way to school as he ponders this. Derek brought him a coffee and a bagel. That means something. It has to mean something.

Once they’re parked, Stiles shoots out of the car, throwing one more, “Thank you!” towards Derek before he practically runs into the school.

“Your hair is a mess,” Scott comments once he sees Stiles at their lockers. “It looks like sex hair. Did you and Derek have sex? Is that why you look all wide eyed and shocked?”

Stiles frowns at Scott. “Really? You don’t have your own sex life to worry about rather than make one up for me?”

Scott rolls his eyes and then digs through his locker. “Allison and I are waiting. We decided that we wanted it to mean something, so...we’re waiting.”

Stiles pats Scott on the shoulder a couple times. “There, there, friend. It’ll be okay.”

Now Scott is the one frowning at Stiles. “I said ‘we’ as in I was there too.”

Stiles shrugs. “All I know is that we’re seniors and still not getting laid, and I have even expanded my options since freshman year.”

Scott laughs. “You’ll find the one, buddy. You will.” He pats Stiles on the shoulder, and the humor in it is not lost on Stiles.

“Thanks, bro,” Stiles says sourly, opening his locker. He glances at the coffee cup in his hand, and all he can think about is how this means something.

Maybe Derek is trying to make up for the way their friendship ended? Maybe he feels bad about it and feels like Stiles deserves to be treated better this time around. That’s probably it. It can’t be anything else.

Still staring at the coffee cup, Stiles remembers how he couldn’t drink coffee for almost a year after his mom died.

Stiles woke up early that day without a reason. No alarm went off, and there was no school because it was a Saturday. Stiles usually slept in, but for some reason, not that day. He went downstairs and walked into the kitchen to see his mom pouring coffee.

On her hand.

She was pouring hot coffee on her hand.

“Mom!” Stiles yelled. “Stop!” 

She looked up at him in surprise and then down at her hand. Suddenly, she pulled away and dropped the coffee pot on the floor, glass shattering loudly. Stiles ran over, grabbing his mom’s hand and putting it under the cool tap water. 

He could hardly hear it over the water running, but there was no mistaking the sounds of his mother’s sobs. 

It took everything in him to not start crying, especially because there was definitely glass in his feet, but he had to be strong for his mom. He tiptoed to the freezer and grabbed some ice, wrapping it in a dish towel and holding it over his mom’s hand. 

“I’m crazy,” she sobbed, her head bowed forward. Stiles could see the tears dripping onto the floor. “I really am crazy. That doctor was right. I’m crazy.”

Stiles wrapped his other arm around his mom. “No, Mom. You’re not crazy. It’s okay.”

She shook her head as she sobbed. “I’m going crazy, Stiles. I’m crazy.”

“You coming?” Scott asks, and belatedly, Stiles realizes the first bell rang. He follows his best friend to class, his mom’s sobs still echoing in his ears.

He remembers it’s almost his birthday, and he wonders if the doctors are going to tell him the same thing they told his mom. His stomach is uneasy at the thought. Not that his mom turned out to be crazy, so maybe it’s something else. Or maybe it’s the same thing his mom had and died from.

His dad wouldn’t survive another heartbreak like that, Stiles knows it. He saw how his mom dying broke his dad. It would’ve been painful to watch if Stiles hadn’t been so numb that year. Between Derek ending their friendship and his mom dying, Stiles had nothing. He felt nothing. He wanted to be nothing.

Fuck he can’t have thoughts like this during class. Not just because he feels like he might cry, but also because he has no idea what’s going on now. He hasn’t been taking any notes. Maybe Derek would be willing to help him with the homework assignment tonight.

During lunch, Stiles is about to text Derek when the man himself sits down in front of Stiles.

“Hello,” Stiles says, surprised. “I was just about to text you.”

Derek takes a bite of his chicken nugget and raises an eyebrow. “What about?”

“Do you want to have a study date tonight?” Stiles asks.

“Did I just hear something about a date?” Cora asks as she walks up to the table, sitting down next to Derek. “Finally.”

Derek glares at her, and Stiles just blinks in confusion. “It’s a  _ study _ date,” Derek reiterates, still glaring at his sister until he turns to look at Stiles. “Yeah, that sounds good.”

“Great I’ll order pizza!” Stiles is excited. He isn’t sure why this is so exciting, but hey, he’ll get his homework done probably at a decent hour.


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> it's still monday where i am so this counts as on time

Stiles orders the pizza, and it arrives before Derek gets to his house. He orders two because Derek likes pineapple on his pizza, and Stiles thinks he’s a heathen for it. Also, Derek can eat a whole pizza like nobody’s business. It’s really impressive actually and kind of beautiful.

Derek arrives shortly after the pizza, though, so Stiles doesn’t have to worry about it getting cold.

“There’s pizza,” Derek says, surprised.

“I said there would be,” Stiles says defensively. “Do I not keep my promises?”

Derek shakes his head. “I just thought it was gonna be studying, you know? You didn’t have to buy me dinner.”

“It’s to bribe you into sharing your notes for math because I totally zoned out today and need help.”

Derek drops his backpack next to the coffee table where the pizzas are sitting and looks down away from Stiles. “Oh,” is all he says.

He sounds disappointed, and Stiles can’t figure out why. Instead, he offers to get Derek a drink.

“Water would be good thanks,” Derek says, so Stiles runs to the kitchen to grab the drinks. 

When he comes back, Derek is already sitting on the couch, getting textbooks out of his backpack. Stiles sits next to him, placing their drinks on the table. 

“Dig in,” Stiles tells him, waving at the pizzas. 

Derek opens one and then just stares at it.

“What’s wrong?” Stiles asks because he doesn’t move for like ever.

Derek shakes his head and looks over at Stiles. “You remembered.”

“Of course,” Stiles says. “Dude, we were best friends at one point. How could I not remember?”

“Right,” Derek says, nodding. He grabs a slice of pizza and takes a giant bite out of it. “What do you want to start with?”

“Can I look at your notes for chemistry today?” he asks.

Derek nods and grabs his notebook, opening it to the right page before handing it to Stiles. “Not much happened. Why do you need them? You were in class today.”

“Had a lot on my mind,” Stiles admits.

“You wanna talk about it?” Derek offers.

Stiles’ heart swells at the offer, but.... “I can’t,” he confesses. “Not yet. But I’ll take you up on it later.”

“Okay,” Derek says, and goes for his pizza again while Stiles copies his notes. 

“Did you get the homework assignment for tonight?” Stiles asks.

Derek grabs a napkin and wipes his hands before he points to three problems on his notes. “We’re supposed to solve those.”

Stiles nods. “Thanks, dude.” He copies the problems down before he grabs a slice of his pizza. Derek is already halfway through his pizza, and it almost makes Stiles laugh. For some reason, he finds it so endearing that Derek can out eat him any day of the week.

Stiles’ eyes travel down to Derek’s flat stomach, wondering where Derek keeps all of that food. He’s pretty muscular now, more muscular than a seventeen year old has any right to be. Stiles wishes he could manage to bulk up like that, but then he would have to make an effort to go to the gym regularly, and that just sounds like a lot of work. Lacrosse practice is hard enough.

Plus, he has enough to worry about. His mind is wandering way too often for comfort. He is forgetting way too many things. Before he knows it, he’ll be forgetting who his dad is. He can’t let it get to that point. He has to move out before that happens. His dad can’t go through that again. He just can’t.

Derek’s hand rests on Stiles’ shoulder, making Stiles jump.

“You okay?” Derek asks, looking concerned.

Stiles realizes that his pizza is halfway to his mouth, so he puts it down. “Yeah, I’m good. Sorry. Just zoned out.”

“That’s been happening a lot, hasn’t it?” Derek asks. “Like in class today?”

Stiles doesn’t want to admit that Derek is right. “It’s fine,” he says instead. “I’m okay.” He shrugs off Derek’s hand and goes back to eating.

It’s a week later, and Stiles is skipping school on his birthday. He told his dad he just wanted to sleep in and play video games for his birthday, so his dad let him. His dad doesn’t know that Stiles isn’t at home, sleeping in, or playing video games.

He’s at the doctor. 

He is in the exam room, sitting on the table with his feet dangling. He has been waiting for five minutes for the doctor, and his anxiety is making his heart race.

The doctor finally comes in and smiles at Stiles. It’s the same doctor who told his mom that she should be admitted to a behavioral health hospital. Stiles’ anxiety skyrockets, thinking he’s going to be told the same thing.

“Stiles,” the doctor greets, closing the door behind him. “What’s going on?”

“I’m eighteen today,” Stiles says instead. “I just want to make sure, everything is confidential now, right? You can’t tell my dad?”

“Right,” the doctor answers with a nod, sitting on the stool. “We can no longer share anything with your father. Why is that a concern?”

“I’m experiencing symptoms,” Stiles says slowly. He explains all of them. He explains how he keeps forgetting what words are, how he forgets to do simple tasks like brush his teeth or go grocery shopping like his father asked, and how he can’t seem to focus on anything to save his life.

The doctor types everything up in his computer and nods. “You believe you have what your mom had.” It’s not a question.

“It’s a fear, yeah,” Stiles answers.

The doctor nods. “I’m not going to lie to you. It is a possibility, and I will check for it, but it could be something else.”

“Like?” Stiles asks.

“Like a mental disorder,” the doctor says, and Stiles opens his mouth to fight, but the doctor holds up his hand. “I know. I said the same thing about your mom, and it wasn’t right. That’s why I will run tests first. I’d like to do a brain MRI first, but in the meantime as we wait for your insurance company to approve it, I’d like you to see a psychiatrist. Just in case.”

“No,” Stiles says. “I want to see the results of the MRI first.”

“Fair enough,” the doctor says. “The insurance will call you in a couple days to set up a time to get the MRI. It was nice seeing you, Stiles, even though it’s not the best circumstances. Happy birthday.”

“Thanks,” Stiles says, his tone flat. He stands up and follows the doctor towards the waiting room. He leaves the office and rushes to his car. Once he’s there, he lets himself lose a little control. His hands are shaking, his breathing is rushed, and he can’t get enough air in so he keeps trying over and over.

He’s crazy.

That’s what this is. He’s crazy.

Derek laughed at him, at his theory. “You think I’m a werewolf?” Derek asked, his eyebrow raised.

“You always miss the day of and day after the full moon at school,” Stiles explained. “You hear things you shouldn’t be able to. You’re always sniffing at stuff. It’s just weird, Derek.”

Derek rolled his eyes. “You’re crazy, Stiles.”

That made Stiles stop. Derek knew. He knew what was going on with Stiles’ mom, how the doctor told her she was crazy, how scared she is of being crazy, and how Stiles was scared that she was going crazy too.

Derek  _ knew _ . 

Tears welled up in Stiles’ eyes. 

“I’m not a werewolf, Stiles,” Derek told him again. “You’re just crazy.”

Stiles walked away after that, and they stopped talking and seeing each other. Derek stopped calling the house to talk to Stiles. Stiles stopped showing up randomly at the Hale house to bother them so his parents could get a break.

Everything stopped.

And Derek was right.

Derek is right.

Stiles is going crazy.


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> happy monday, my friends!!

Once again, Stiles is up late working on a paper that is due once he gets to class today. It’s one in the morning, and he might be hallucinating at this point because his phone just lit up with a text from Derek.

He pauses his hard work (aka staring at a blank document until his eyes burn) to check the text, wondering why the fuck Derek is awake.

**Derek: I can’t sleep. Are you awake?**

**Stiles: only always**

**Derek: Why are you awake?**

**Stiles: English paper**

**Derek: Due today?**

**Stiles: Due today...**

He puts his phone down and tries to work on the paper again. His phone vibrating with a new message distracts him, though.

**Derek: Do you need to talk through it?**

Stiles takes that as an invitation to call Derek. 

“Hello?” Derek answers softly.

“Can we talk on the phone or no?” Stiles asks.

“Yeah, sure. What’s up with your paper? What’s it on?”

They end up talking on the phone for over an hour, and by the end of it, Stiles has an intro paragraph written and two supporting paragraphs.

“Thank you so much, dude,” Stiles tells him. “I can’t tell you how helpful you were.”

“It was all you, Stiles,” Derek says. “You’re the one who came up with the ideas. I just listened.”

Reflecting back on the phone call, Stiles realizes that’s true. “Still. Super helpful.”

“I’m gonna go to bed now,” Derek says. “Do you need a ride to school tomorrow? I don’t imagine you’ll be sleeping at all tonight.”

“‘I’ll never say no to that,” Stiles laughs.

“See you at seven thirty.”

“See you.” Stiles hangs up and goes back to writing the rest of his paper. The conclusion paragraph is always the hardest for him. Well, the concluding sentence is. He always finds it difficult to start his papers and end them interestingly. 

He finally says fuck it and just writes whatever is in his head, prints it out, stuffs it in his backpack, and passes out on his bed with the lights still on.

Fortunately, he actually wakes up to his alarm set at seven in the morning. He’s groggy, but has enough time to shower and get ready before Derek texts him that he’s here.

Once he opens the car door, the scent of freshly baked muffins hits him right in the face. “Dude,” Stiles gasps once he sees the muffins on the passenger seat. He delicately picks them up, sits down, and places them in his lap. 

“Mom made them,” Derek tells him. “I made the coffee, though.” He gestures to the cup holders where there are two cups of coffee. 

“Why are you so nice to me?” Stiles asks, and it takes him a second to realize that it was a real question.

“Because we’re friends,” Derek tells him, looking away like he’s nervous.

“Wait a second....” That’s when Stiles realizes. “You like me.”

“No,” Derek scoffs.

Stiles shakes his head, carefully putting the muffins on the floor and bringing his feet up on the seat. “I’m being serious, Derek. You  _ like _ me.”

That’s when Derek’s cheeks and the tips of his ears turn red. “No,” he denies again.

Stiles can’t stop smiling, though. “I can’t believe someone as hot as you would like me.”

“Can we just get to the part where you reject me and we drive to school in an awkward silence?” Derek asks, leaning his head against the headrest and looking up.

“No,” Stiles says immediately. “I’m not rejecting you. I mean, I gotta be honest and say I’ve never given it serious thought. Yeah, it’s been a daydream, but I didn’t think it would ever actually  _ happen _ .”

“You daydream about me?” Derek asks, turning his head to look at Stiles.

It’s Stiles’ turn to turn red. “I mean, don’t make it weird, okay? I just. Yeah. Dating your best friend? Who is also extremely hot? Who is also really dorky and funny and adorable? Yeah, that’s a daydream.”

“Scott’s your best friend,” Derek says slowly, looking away.

“You’re missing all of the points today,” Stiles tells him, shaking his head. “One, I can have more than two best friends. It’s entirely possible. We’re not in sixth grade anymore. And two, I don’t feel the same way about Scott that I do you.”

Derek looks back at him. “You don’t?”

Stiles shakes his head again. “I don’t, but in all honesty...” Stiles pauses and takes a deep breath. “I’m going through a lot mentally right now, and I’m not sure you want to have to deal with it.”

“Can I take you on a date?” Derek asks.

“I...,” Stiles stops and sighs. “Are you sure? Are you absolutely sure?”

“I’m going through a lot too,” Derek answers. “Everyone comes with baggage. I’ll help you carry yours if you help me carry mine.”

And well, Stiles can’t say no to that. “How’s Friday work for you?”

Derek’s answering smile is wide, and it makes the skin by his eyes scrunch up a little and fuck. Stiles is gone. He’s so far gone. How did he never realize how far gone on Derek he was?

When they get to school, they walk through the parking lot and through the halls together, their hands brushing the back of each other’s every now and then. Each touch makes Stiles’ stomach flip, and Derek’s ears are permanently tinged red. 

“I’ll, uh, see you at lunch?” Derek asks like he’s suddenly unsure Stiles is interested in him.

Stiles resists the urge to kiss Derek right then and there, but he does grab Derek’s hand, squeezing it once before letting it go. “I’ll see you at lunch.”

Derek ducks his head, trying to hide his smile from Stiles as he turns away to walk to his locker. It’s the cutest shit Stiles has ever seen in his entire life.

“So?” Scott says, leaning against Stiles’ locker.

“We’re not dating,” Stiles tells him, eyebrows raised and then he looks away. “Yet.”

Scott laughs, and when Stiles looks back at him, his arms are raised in celebration. “Finally. When’s the big night?”

“Friday,” Stiles answers.

“Thanks for letting me win the bet,” Scott says, patting Stiles on the shoulder before standing up straight. He walks away without another word or an opportunity for Stiles to say something.

A bet? There was a bet? Stiles is so going to investigate this further.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> are y'all ready for the next chapter? for the Big Date?   
> ...i'm not.


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so i know i promised the Big Date this chapter, but um... sometimes the story just does things you don't expect. i still really like this chapter and i hope you guys enjoy it!

**Laura:** **Heard you’re finally taking my brother out tonight**

**Stiles: Pretty sure he’s taking me out ;)**

**Laura: What are you gonna wear?**

**Stiles: Uhhhh...clothes?**

Apparently that wasn’t the right answer because Laura promptly calls him. “I’m on my way,” she says before he can even greet her.

“On your way where?” Stiles asks, confused.

“To you, duh,” she tells him, and Stiles can see the roll of her eyes.

“Why?” He always feel ten steps behind when it comes to Laura.

She sighs. “Stiles. Are you trying to annoy me?”

“No, I’m just naturally good at it.”

That gets her to laugh. “I’m coming over to help you get dressed. You gotta dress to impress.”

“I thought I already impressed Derek enough to ask me out?” Stiles says slowly. To be honest, the whole thing hasn’t really sunk in yet. It doesn’t feel real, which scares Stiles a little. Does it not feel real because he is in shock, or does it not feel real because...?

He doesn’t want to think of the other option, so he doesn’t. He focuses on the fact that Laura is coming over, “Do you have an ETA?”   
“Five minutes,” she says, and before he can question why she is so close, she explains. “I was already out grabbing food before spending the weekend at the house.”

“Got it.” He stands up and walks over to his closet. Suddenly, nothing in there seems like it’s good enough. “Door is open whenever you get here.” They hang up after that, and Stiles starts rifling through his drawers. Everything is in disarray when Laura gets up to his room.

“Looks like a tornado came through here,” she says with a laugh, putting her bag and food down on Stiles’ desk. “Let’s see what we can do...” She walks over and starts going through his clothes. Stiles watches from the sidelines as she picks out a couple of sweaters and a black v-neck he forgot he had. 

Next, she rifles through his jeans and holds a pair up against him. She frowns as she judges him carefully. “Try these on,” she demands, handing over the pants and turning around so he can have some sort of privacy.

“So bossy,” Stiles mumbles under his breath.

“Heard that!” Laura calls out from where she is staring in his closet.

“How?” Stiles asks, surprised. It wasn’t even loud enough to be considered a whisper.

She taps her ears. “Super hearing,” she says. “Are you decent?”

“No, but I’m dressed,” he says, so she turns around.

She is frowning again, which Stiles isn’t taking as a good sign. “Do you have anything that, you know,  _ fits _ ?”

He looks down at his jeans. Sure, they’re a little baggy, but they’re not falling off. “These fit,” he defends, looking back up at Laura.

She sighs, shaking her head. “Turn around,” she commands, waving her finger in a circle. He follows her demand and turns around. He swears he can feels eyes on his butt when his back is facing Laura. Once he’s facing her again, she’s frowning  _ again _ .

“What?” Stiles asks, his voice loud and almost whiney. 

“Your ass is hidden in those jeans,” she tells him and then picks up another pair, inspecting them. When she looks up, she doesn’t look happy, but she throws the pair in her hands on the bed and picks up  _ another _ pair.  “These are all the  _ same size _ !”

“Yes because that’s my size!” Stiles exclaims. At this point, he’s regretting not locking his front door in preparation for her arrival. However, something tells him that she would’ve found a way in even if the front door was locked.

Laura tsks at him, shaking her head. “You’ve got to have a pair in here that emphasizes your assets. You gotta impress him, Stiles.”

“Derek?” he asks. “Derek’s thoroughly impressed by me already, okay? I don’t need to wear super tight clothes for him to like me. He already does.”

She rolls her eyes. “He  _ likes _ you? Please. That doofus has been in love with you since you guys met.”

This time, Stiles rolls his eyes. “Sure.”

She glances at him with a raised eyebrow and then goes back to their original fight and her search for tight pants. She pulls a burgundy pair of pants that Stiles had buried in his drawers a year ago when he got them from his aunt for Christmas. 

“Those don’t fit,” he tells her, but she’s already shoving them in his arms.

“Change,” she demands once again.

He is getting exhausted with the fighting. At this rate, he won’t have any energy for the actual date. With a sigh, he admits defeat as Laura sits at his desk and starts eating her fries. 

“All this arguing made me hungry,” she says.

“You were already hungry,” Stiles reminds her as he slips off his comfy jeans  _ that fit _ . Then he slides on the burgundy pants, and they are so much more difficult to put on, but he does it because he knows if he doesn’t, Laura will fight him on it. “I think these pants are cutting off the circulation to my balls.”

Laura snorts and turns around in the desk chair to face him. She scans his bottom half, circling her finger again for him to turn around, so he does. Once his back is facing her, he can hear her whistle. “Lookin’ good, Stilinski!” she hollers. “Now we need to find a shirt.”

She stands back up, walking right past him and digs through the discarded shirts on Stiles’ bed. Her hands land on the black v-neck, and she picks it up. Walking over to him, she holds it out against his chest. Her head tilts as she stares at him calculatingly. 

“Put this on,” she tells him.

“Once in a while a  _ please _ would be nice,” he responds, pulling his grey t-shirt off. He takes the black shirt from her hands and puts it on.

She nods approvingly, which is actually way more relieving than Stiles thought it would be. He actually feels a little accomplished. “Now, go shower while I eat. We have stuff to talk about before your date.”

He looks at her confused, but listens anyway. He hurries through a shower, dries off, and then adds a tiny bit of gel to his hair to make it swoosh to the side a little even though it’s not very long. Once he’s dressed, he goes back to his room where Laura is sitting at his desk again with her feet up on the desk. 

“You’re an animal,” he hisses, swatting at her feet.

She laughs maniacally. “More than you know.”

Stiles moves some clothes out of his way and then sits on his bed, facing Laura. “What did you want to talk to me about?”

Laura turns to face him and leans forward, elbows on her knees. “You better not break his heart,” she says seriously. “Derek is a fragile person. He doesn’t need you to lead him on and then leave him hanging.”

“I wouldn’t do that,” Stiles immediately argues.

“I know,” she says. “But I have to say it. I’m his older sister, and as his older sister, I also have to say that if you break his heart, or if he comes to me crying because of something you did then I will cut your balls off. You think the pants are bad? They’re nothing compared to me.”

For a second, Stiles could swear that Laura’s eyes turn yellow, but it’s so fast that he isn’t sure anymore. He nods. “I’ll be careful.”

She nods, satisfied with his answer. She stands up, brushing her hands off on her legs, and then walks towards the door. “For the record, I think you’ll be a good thing for him. You’ve always brought him out of his shell.”

“For the record,” Stiles says, standing up and walking over to Laura, “I think he’s gonna be a good thing for me.”

Laura smiles and then wraps her arms around his shoulders. “Who knows? Maybe one day you’ll legally be part of the Hale family.”

“Too soon,” Stiles snorts. There’s an ache in his heart, though. He isn’t one hundred percent sure he’ll be around long enough to become a Hale, and that thought breaks his heart.

“What’s going on?” Laura asks, pulling back and looking concerned. “You... you feel sad.”

He shakes his head and smiles. “Nothing. I’m good. Now, go. Derek is supposed to pick me up in ten minutes.”

She laughs and gives him one more squeeze before pulling away completely. “See you, Stiles. Hopefully more often.”

Stiles smiles at her and nods. “Definitely more often.”

He follows her down the stairs and opens the front door for her. She kisses his cheek and then pats it with her hand before walking to her car that’s parked in the driveway. Stiles watches her get into her car and then drive away before he closes the front door. He hurries upstairs to grab his shoes and remembers last second to put on deodorant. 

Before going downstairs to wait, Stiles stops by a mirror to check himself over. He doesn’t look bad actually. Laura must’ve been onto something.

There’s a knock on the front door, so Stiles rushes down the stairs to open it. He smiles wide when he sees Derek, who’s wearing a soft blue henley that brings out the blue in his eyes and dark jeans. 

“Wow,” Derek says, and when Stiles looks up from his perusal, he sees Derek is staring at him wide-eyed.

“Do I look okay?” Stiles asks, pulling the hem of his shirt down. “I mean, your sister is kind of the one who picked out the outfit, and I can go put something else on if this looks stupid.”

Derek grabs Stiles’ wrists and pulls his hands away from his shirt. Then Derek laces their fingers together. “You look amazing, Stiles,” he whispers. 

Stiles can’t help but smile as his cheeks turn red. “Takes one to know one.”

Derek snorts and rolls his eyes. “You’re so great at complimenting.”

“I am,” Stiles agrees, rubbing his thumb against the back of Derek’s hand. “Now, I was promised a date.”

“Then a date you shall get,” Derek says, dropping one of Stiles’ hands and pulling the other one. “Your chariot awaits.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i can thoroughly promise you (as it is mostly written), the next chapter is the Big Date.


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> it's a little bit of a shorter chapter, but but but BUT it's the Big Date, and i hope you guys enjoy <333333

Of course, the chariot is the camaro, but Stiles loves this car, so he’s not complaining. Derek only lets go of Stiles’ hand to walk around to the other side of the car, but once he’s sitting in the driver’s seat, he grabs Stiles’ hand again. 

“I like holding your hand,” Stiles announces, staring out the windshield as Derek starts driving.

“Yeah?” Derek asks, a hint of excitement in his voice.

“Yeah,” Stiles says. “It’s just... comforting. It’s really nice.”

“I like holding your hand too,” Derek mumbles like he’s almost embarrassed to admit it.

Stiles looks over at him, and he can see Derek smiling softly. It melts Stiles’ heart, and wow, he is so lucky to be in this car right now with this man. Stiles almost can’t believe it. It all feels so surreal.

They go to a fancy Italian restaurant that’s in the next town over. Stiles has never ventured far away from Beacon Hills.

“How did you know about this place?” Stiles asks after they have their drinks. 

Derek ducks his head and hides his face behind the menu. “I asked my parents for suggestions.”

“That is so fucking cute oh my god,” Stiles says, completely serious. “You’re so cute, Derek, so stop hiding behind a menu.” Stiles reaches over and pushes the menu down to the table, so he can look into Derek’s eyes. 

Derek smiles softly at him and slides his hand over Stiles’ hand that was still on the menu. “I just want you to know,” Derek starts and then looks down at their hands. He looks up back up and starts again. “I just want you to know that whatever it is we’re doing... I’m in. I am  _ all _ in.”

Everything in Stiles warms up at that. He can’t think of anything good enough to say, which is good because Derek keeps going.

“I know you said you’re dealing with stuff, and I’m here. I’m always here. I know I wasn’t there when it mattered and that is my biggest regret, but please, let me prove to you that I’m here now.”

Stiles flips his hand so he can squeeze Derek’s because that’s the best he’s got right now. He’s trying so hard not to tear up because he wants to prove to Derek that he’ll be there for him, but he can’t promise that. Not when there’s a chance that Stiles isn’t going to last much longer. 

Derek squeezes Stiles’ hand back and smiles up at him. “Please say something.”

Stiles shakes his head slowly. “Derek, I... I don’t know what to say. There’s so many emotions, and I’m a little overwhelmed.”

Derek’s face falls, and he tries to pull his hand back, but Stiles holds it tighter.

“No,” Stiles says firmly. “I’m not overwhelmed by you. I don’t want to run away. I’m here. I’m in. I just can’t promise a forever with you. Not right now.”

Derek nods, accepting Stiles’ answer. “Do you want to talk about it?”

“About what?” Stiles asks.

“About what you’re going through.”

“Not right now,” Stiles says quietly, looking down. “Maybe later tonight.”

“Okay,” Derek says like that’s all there is to it, like it’s not a big deal. 

To Stiles, it’s a big deal. He can’t imagine sharing what he’s been going through the last couple of months, but it really feels like Derek is the one to tell.

They talk very little throughout dinner, but it isn’t awkward between them. Stiles stretches his foot out and nudges Derek’s foot, but Derek doesn’t move his foot, so Stiles just rests his foot against Derek’s. It’s comfortable, and it feels right. 

Derek grabs the check before Stiles can even think about reaching for it. When Stiles opens his mouth to protest, he gets a dirty look from Derek. 

“Rude,” Stiles mumbles and takes a sip of his soda. 

Once the check is paid, they’re walking back to the car, holding hands again. Stiles can’t help but stare at them because it’s so comforting having his hand held by Derek. He never realized that his thoughts could completely calm down just by a simple touch. 

“So,” Derek says once they’re in the car and he’s driving.

Stiles takes a deep breath. “You know how my mom was before she died?”

“Yes,” Derek says, sounding confused.

Stiles looks out the window and then down at his lap. The words can’t come out. He can’t admit it aloud, but he has to. He has to tell someone, and that someone should be Derek. 

“I’m... experiencing some of the same things,” Stiles says slowly.

“Your what?” Derek asks, glancing at Stiles, but Stiles can’t look back at him.

“I’m forgetting things,” Stiles tells him. “I’m losing words, and I can’t focus on anything. My mind is working against me. I don’t know what’s happening. I think I have what my mom had.”

“You’ve seen a doctor?”

Stiles nods even though Derek can’t see it. “I saw my doctor. I have an MRI scheduled for Monday after school.”

“Can I go with you?” Derek asks, which makes Stiles look over at him.

“You’d do that?” Stiles asks.

Derek nods. “For you, yeah.” He reaches over and grabs Stiles’ hand, squeezing it. 

“Thanks,” Stiles says quietly, looking down at their hands again. “But I’m giving you an out. You don’t have to go through this with me.”

Derek is quiet for a moment and then squeezes Stiles’ hand again. “I made the mistake of running from you once. I’m not making the same mistake again.”

And that’s exactly what Stiles needed to hear.


	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi! have a little bit of a longer chapter to make up for me not updating next monday. i'll be out of the country with no phone service or wifi so i won't be able to upload anything. sorry! but in two weeks from today, i'll post two chapters!

Saturday night, Stiles is sitting at his desk, staring at his computer that has a video game on the screen, but he can’t focus. He can only think about one thing, or one person really. So he calls that person.

“Hello?” Derek answers.

“You didn’t kiss me,” Stiles says without a greeting because it’s been on his mind for twenty-four hours now.

“Laura, stop laughing,” Derek hisses, and there’s muffled sounds over the phone as though Derek is moving. “I’m sorry. What?”

“You heard me,” Stiles says, his voice confident even though he’s having an internal breakdown. “You didn’t kiss me. I want to know why.”

Derek sighs. “You just admitted something really personal and vulnerable. It didn’t seem like the right time to kiss you, Stiles.”

“Well, still.”

“Still what?” Derek asks.

“I still wanted you to kiss me,” Stiles mumbles, not feeling very confident anymore. “Is there something wrong with me? Is that why you won’t kiss me? Was the whole thing just a prank? Did Jackson put you up to this?”

“Jesus,” Derek breathes out. “Stiles. No to all of that. Damnit... just give me ten minutes, okay?”

“Ten minutes for what?” Stiles asks, but then his phone beeps because Derek hung up on him. “Ten minutes for what?” Sadly, the room doesn’t answer Stiles’ question, so he just goes back to his game. He keeps dying because he is trying to piece together what Derek is talking about.

A few minutes later, there’s a knock on Stiles’ window that scares the  _ shit _ out of him. He pauses his game and goes to check his window to see Derek staring at him from the other side. 

“You scared me,” Stiles says after he opens the window to let Derek in.

Derek doesn’t say anything as he climbs in and rights himself. Once he’s standing, he grabs Stiles’ face and kisses him. Stiles is pretty sure he makes a surprised noise that is muffled by Derek’s lips, but then he sinks into the kiss. 

Stiles thought holding hands was awesome? Shit. This kissing Derek thing is so much better. A million times better. He wraps his arms around Derek’s waist and kisses back fiercely because he didn’t know that this is exactly what he was missing.

Derek nibbles on Stiles’ bottom lip, gives him one soft kiss, and then pulls away, but not very far. His hands are still cradling Stiles’ face, and his eyes are closed as he breathes heavily. “There’s nothing wrong with you,” Derek whispers, and it almost feels like there’s a deeper meaning behind it.

Stiles shakes the hands off his face, so he can bury his face into Derek’s neck. He tightens his arms around Derek as Derek wraps his arms around Stiles. “Thank you,” Stiles says softly.

They hold onto each other for a few more minutes until a car starts honking. Derek sighs and pulls away, giving Stiles a quick kiss.

“That’s Laura,” he says.

“Why did she come with you?” Stiles asks, laughing.

Derek rolls his eyes as he shakes his head. “No idea, but she’s getting inpatient now so I better go. Later.”

“Later,” Stiles says, grabbing Derek’s face and pulling him in for one last kiss that Derek returns eagerly. 

Derek huffs a laugh as he pulls away, backing towards the window and keeping his eyes on Stiles until he gets to the window. 

Once, he’s gone, Stiles realizes that he has never felt lighter. He sits on the edge of his bed and sighs happily. This is a thing he gets to do now. He gets to kiss Derek whenever Derek will let him. It’s such an exciting feeling, and Stiles is disappointed that Derek is no longer here.

**Stiles: There definitely needs to be more of that in our future.**

It takes another twenty minutes of fiddling around on his computer, but then Derek finally responds.

**Derek: More of what? Kissing?**

**Stiles: For sure, my dude.**

**Derek: We can definitely arrange that ;)**

Stiles’ stomach feels a little funny, and his head feels light. Is this how Scott feels about Allison? Man, Stiles has been missing out on all the fun.

They end up making plans for Stiles to come over the next day for brunch because Laura misses him. Stiles isn’t complaining. He loves the Hales, and well, any excuse to see Derek is a  _ great _ excuse.

The next morning, Stiles wakes up after a  _ really _ good dream, but he can’t go to Derek’s half hard, so he gets up and takes a cold shower. Surprisingly, the shower helps, and then Stiles is getting ready to go to Derek’s. He throws on a t-shirt with a plaid overshirt and jeans. What he doesn’t think about is what Laura will say when she sees him.

“Seriously,” Laura deadpans when she opens the front door for him. “I thought we had made some progress.”

Stiles shrugs in response because what else is he supposed to say? 

“Get in, dork,” she laughs, waving him in. 

He runs in and gives her a long hug. “How’s school?” he asks.

“Ugh,” she groans as she pulls away from him. “I don’t want to talk about it.”

“Fair enough,” he says, looking around her.

“He’s upstairs,” Laura says with a laugh, rolling her eyes. “You two are ridiculous, but I’m glad you both joined the party.”

“What are you talking about?” Stiles asks.

“Just go,” she says, pointing at the stairs. “We’ll hang out after you two have canoodled or some shit.”

“Language,” Talia calls out from the kitchen.

“Hi, Talia,” Stiles calls to her, giving Laura a look.

“Hello, Stiles,” Talia greets back, and Stiles can hear the smile in her voice. “Derek is in his room, studying, but I’m sure once you get up there, he won’t be.”

Stiles can feel himself turning red, but he ignores everyone and runs up the stairs as if they don’t see his red face as he goes. It’s been years since he’s been upstairs, but he still knows exactly where Derek’s room is: the third door on the right. It’s the farthest room from the stairs.

“Your family is the worst,” Stiles says once the door is closed behind him.

Derek doesn’t even look up from staring at the textbook on his desk. “One second,” he mumbles, holding a finger up. 

Stiles glares at the back of his head, but decides fighting for his attention right now isn’t worth it, so he sits on Derek’s bed. Damn. Stiles forgot how comfy Derek’s bed is, so he lays down after toeing off his shoes and snuggles up with the eight pillows Derek has.

“Stiles, shut up,” Derek says, sounding pained.

“What?” Stiles asks. “I didn’t say anything.” He looks up from the nest of pillows to see Derek’s red ears.

“You’re moaning,” Derek whispers.

“Oh,” is all Stiles can say before he is red  _ again _ . What is it with this family and always embarrassing him?

Derek sighs and slams his textbook shut. “I can’t do this when you’re here and on my bed.” He stands up, and Stiles can’t help but smile as he walks towards the bed. 

“You are infuriating,” Derek tells him, looking serious, but Stiles knows he doesn’t mean it. 

Stiles raises an eyebrow and leans back against the pillows again, watching Derek closely. “Am I? How so?”

Derek’s eyes narrow as he puts a knee on the mattress. “Let me count the ways,” he says, leaning down and swinging his other leg onto the bed. He rests a hand on Stiles’ chest as he leans down. It feels like Stiles is watching Derek inch closer and closer for at least a million years, but then  _ finally _ , Derek is kissing him. 

Stiles inhales sharply and grabs at Derek’s face to hold him securely to his own face. He was so right. This is the best thing ever.

Derek’s hand slides up Stiles’ chest and then rests on the side of Stiles’ neck. His hand is so big and warm and its presence is grounding. It reminds Stiles that this is real life. It’s not a dream, and that is such a heady feeling.

Stiles’ hands slide down Derek’s chest and stomach until his fingers are playing with the edge of Derek’s shirt. “Off,” Stiles mumbles between kisses, tugging at the shirt.

With a loud sigh, Derek sits up and removes his shirt, but then repositions himself so he is laying on top of Stiles.

“Oh my god,” Stiles moans, feeling Derek’s heat against him as his hands run over Derek’s back. 

“Shh,” Derek laughs. “You have to be quiet. Can you do that?”

“No,” Stiles tells him honestly. “Not when it’s you.”

Derek looks down at him fondly and then rolls his eyes. “Guess we’ll have to keep your mouth busy then, won’t we?”

“Fuck,” Stiles whispers. “What did I do to deserve you?”

Derek smirks and then they’re kissing again, and Stiles is wondering why they started talking in the first place. It might have been his fault, but he’s not sure. All he can focus on is the smooth skin of Derek’s back. Once he’s done exploring Derek’s back, Stiles slides his hands to Derek’s front, feeling his abs and sliding his pointer finger over Derek’s nipple.

Derek sucks in a breath when Stiles does that, so he does it again to the other one. “You’ll be the death of me, Stilinski,” Derek half says, half moans. 

“What a way to go, though,” Stiles says until Derek’s mouth is on his again and his body presses closer to Stiles. The way their bodies fit together is incredible. It just feels so easy, so natural to Stiles. He isn’t questioning what he’s doing; he’s just doing whatever, and it seems to be working for Derek. 

But then Derek rolls his hips.

“ _ Holy fuck _ ,” Stiles whispers, trying to be quiet as Derek kisses and sucks at his throat. “You’re hard, aren’t you?”

Derek rolls his hips again. “Obviously,” he says before biting at Stiles’ neck. 

Stiles finds his hands on Derek’s ass before he has any thought about doing that. One second they’re on smooth skin, and the next, Stiles has a handful of jean-covered ass. It’s  _ glorious _ .

Derek starts up a rhythm with his hips, and Stiles eagerly tries to follow. Then he remembers the rule about being quiet, so he slides a hand up Derek’s back and tugs at his hair, which makes Derek moan, the sound muffled against Stiles’ neck.  

“You need to kiss me  _ now _ ,” Stiles hisses. 

Derek is eager to listen, and they’re kissing, and it’s great and then Derek is sucking on Stiles’ bottom lip. Everything is so good, better than Stiles could have ever imagined.

Then something sharp nicks Stiles’ lip, and he jerks away. “Ow,” he says before he starts tasting blood in his mouth. He looks up at Derek, whose eyes are wide with fear, and they’re glowing blue.

Derek practically leaps off the bed and gets himself as far away from Stiles as possible. “I’m so sorry,” he says, but it sounds like almost has a lisp. 

“Are your teeth that sharp?” Stiles wonders aloud, touching the inside of his lip and pulling away his finger to see that there’s blood just like he thought. Then he looks back up at Derek and remembers: Derek’s eyes aren’t that blue, and they don’t glow.

“Wait,” Stiles says, sitting up suddenly. “What the fuck.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> in retrospect...this might not have been a good place to leave you guys hanging for 2 weeks. my bad.


	17. Chapter 17

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'M SO SORRY I'M A DAY LATE

Stiles isn’t sure how he gets from point A to point B, but one second he was in Derek’s bed, and the next, he is sitting in front of Talia’s desk in her office. 

He can feel how wide his eyes are, and he knows that he hasn’t stopped looking at the pristine desk since he got in there. Not that he really sees the desk. All he can see is a set of blue, glowing eyes. 

“Stiles?” Talia says gently.

“Yeah?” he asks absentmindedly, still staring at the glowing eyes on the desk. What the fuck.

“Can you look at me?” she asks, her voice still gentle like she’s talking to a frightened child, which...makes sense.

He slowly looks up the desk and then up into Talia’s eyes. “Are your eyes going to glow blue too?” Belatedly, he realizes that Derek is standing in the corner behind Talia, but he can’t look directly at Derek. He just can’t.

Stiles leans closer to Talia. “Am I going crazy?” he asks in a whisper.

She shakes her head. “No, you’re not going crazy.”

He points at Derek. “His eyes were glowing blue, and his teeth were sharp. Excuse my language, but what the fuck.”

Talia’s mouth twitches in the corners like she’s trying not to laugh. Stiles isn’t sure how this is a laughing matter at all. Her son is... her son is not human. 

“Please don’t be frightened, Stiles,” Talia says, reaching a hand across the desk to rest on top of Stiles’. “What I have to tell you may be a little startling, but please listen closely.”

“If you guys are werewolves, I’m honestly going to be pissed,” Stiles tells her.

Her eyebrows raise in shock. “You knew?”

He shakes his head. “No, or at least, I did at one point, but Derek called me crazy, so I didn’t think it was a thing, but now I’m thinking it’s a thing because of your response and  _ fuck me _ . You guys are werewolves!” He rips his hand from Talia’s and stands up. “You guys are werewolves and  _ you _ ,” he points at Derek, “never told me! In fact, you called me the worst possible thing you could think of and ended our friendship because I guessed  _ right _ ? You  _ asshole _ !”

Derek doesn’t look up from where he’s staring at the floor, but his shoulders hunch up, and he looks like he’s trying to become one with the wall. 

Stiles doesn’t care at how sad and pathetic Derek looks right now. All he can do is turn his anger onto Talia. “You didn’t tell me either! What the hell is wrong with you guys? I thought I was part of your family!”

“Stiles,” Talia says softly, standing up slowly. “Please, calm down. We can talk about this.”

“You want to talk now?” Stiles yells. “What about four years ago? What about when I  _ needed _ you guys the most?” He doesn’t realize he’s crying until the tears hit his chin. Quickly, he wipes at the tears and sits down. “Fine. Talk. Explain.”

Talia sits back down and glances at Derek, who still hasn’t looked up. “Stiles, please don’t blame Derek. He was under strict instructions to never tell you. We knew he wanted to, we knew that eventually we would have to tell you, but thirteen was way too young for the responsibility of knowing to be put on you.”

Stiles glances up at Derek, thinking over Talia’s words. “Did you tell him what to say?”

“No,” she admits.

“Then I’m still mad at him.”

Somehow, Derek curls up even more into himself.

“Stiles,” Talia says, bringing his attention back to her. “You have to understand. Derek would do anything to protect us.”

“Protect you guys from  _ me _ ?” Stiles asks, narrowing his eyes in suspicion.

“The world,” Talia corrects. “If the wrong people found out about us, about what we can do... well, that would be the end of werewolves.”

“What do you mean by ‘What we can do’?” Stiles asks.

“I can only tell you if you promise you won’t share our secret. Please, Stiles. We trust you completely, and I know you’re angry with us, but the safety of our family depends on you keeping this to yourself.”

He thinks about it for a moment before nodding. This family is practically his own. He wouldn’t risk their safety even in his anger. “I promise.”

She begins to explain to him their above average strength, their ability to heal themselves, and how fast they are. She talks for so long, and Stiles can hardly stay focused on the situation. She talks about how they can smell and hear things people can’t, how they smell emotions and can even smell sickness.

“You knew my mom was sick as soon as she was, didn’t you?” Stiles quickly asks because he just  _ knows _ they had to.

Talia sighs. “We did.”

“So you can heal yourselves, but you can’t heal others?” he asks.

“Not necessarily,” she says slowly.

He frowns. “What does that mean?”

“It means, the bite can heal,” Derek says.

Stiles’ head snaps to look at Derek, who is still staring at the floor. “What does  _ that _ mean?”

Talia takes a deep breath. “I’m the alpha, and that means that if I bit someone with my fangs, they could turn into a werewolf.”

“And turning someone into a werewolf would heal them?” Stiles questions.

“Yes,” she says softly. 

“So you could’ve healed my mom, and you didn’t?” Stiles can’t even describe the anger that’s bubbling in him right now. He is waiting for an actual answer, but he knows the answer. They could have saved his mom.  _ Talia _ could have saved his mom, and she didn’t. 

“Stiles,” Talia says, and her sad tone answers his question.

He stands up quickly and walks out of the office. He can hear his name being called out by Talia and Derek, but he doesn’t turn around. He doesn’t stop until Laura grabs his arm.

“Stiles, what’s wrong?” she asks.

“As if you don’t know?” he practically shouts. “As if your stupid super werewolf hearing couldn’t hear our entire conversation?”

“Mom’s office is soundproofed, so we can’t hear what goes on inside of it,” Laura says slowly. “Wait you know?” She looks behind him at Talia and Derek with a look of confusion. “What happened?”

Stiles rips his arm out of her grip. “Your precious alpha let my mom die. That’s what happened.” And then he’s walking as fast as he can out the front door and to his car.

There’s a hand on his car’s door, so Stiles can’t open it. “Go away, Derek.”

“Let us explain,” Derek pleads. “Please, Stiles. I promise there’s an explanation for all of this.”

Stiles closes his eyes and takes a deep breath. “I can’t even look at you right now because I am so angry at you.” His voice sounds unfamiliar to his ears. It’s hard and cracks for the first time since puberty first hit. 

“Stiles.” 

Stiles has never heard his name sound so sad. It almost breaks him. Almost. “Let me go, Derek.”

“No,” Derek tells him, his voice trying to be hard. “You have to let us explain.”

Stiles’ eyes flash open as he turns to face Derek. “You guys killed my mom!” he yells. “What is there to explain? She’s gone. You could have saved, and you didn’t. She’s dead. You could’ve prevented that, but you didn’t. She’s gone, and I’ll never see my mom again.”

Derek’s eyes are so sad, but Stiles can’t focus on that. Stiles can only focus on getting out of there. 

“And  _ you _ ,” Stiles cries out. “You used my worst fear against me. You made me think I was going crazy like her.”

“I-” Derek starts, but Stiles holds up his hand.

“You were protecting your family. I get it. Your family means more than me, than my mom’s life. I get it.”

Derek’s hand slides off the jeep, so Stiles takes his opportunity and rips the door open, jumping in before anyone can stop him.

“Stiles,  _ please _ ,” Derek begs. “I can’t. You can’t. I need you.”

Stiles slams the door shut. “You either back the fuck up, or I won’t think twice about running over your foot. You’d heal anyway.”

Derek takes a few steps back, so Stiles backs up his car and drives as fast as he can away from the Hale house.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i promise things get better next chapter


	18. Chapter 18

After an hour of hearing his phone constantly go off, Stiles turns it off. He can’t keep seeing Derek’s name on his phone screen or even Laura’s, but especially not Derek’s. His name hurts Stiles too much. It hurts to picture his face, and it hurts to see his name on the phone screen.

It really isn’t a surprise when there’s a knock on Stiles’ window half an hour later. What is surprising is that it’s Laura. 

Because he’s always had a soft spot for her, he opens the window and lets her in. 

“Stiles,” she sighs and wraps him up in her arms. He lets her because he needs it. Her hands reach to the back of his head and bring it down to rest on her shoulder. “I’m so sorry.”

And well, that’s all it takes for Stiles to cry into Laura’s shoulder. She rubs his back and runs her fingers through his hair, and it’s so comforting, but he can’t stop crying. He lost his mom. His mom is gone and was gone before she died. Her personality, her memories, they were all gone before she died. She didn’t even recognize Stiles. 

He has never taken the time to realize this. “You guys could have helped,” he sobs, holding Laura closer. 

“Oh, Stiles,” Laura says, her voice sounding so, so sad. “Please, let me explain. We couldn’t help your mom. She wouldn’t let us.”

That shocks him enough to pull back. “She knew?”

Laura nods. “She knew. Your dad knows.”

“I’m the last to know?”

“You weren’t old enough,” Laura tells him. “It was too much to ask of you at that age.”

That takes some of the anger out of him. Without it, he’s exhausted, so he falls into his bed. “Please explain.”

“Okay,” Laura says softly, sounding a lot like her mother. She sits at the foot of the bed and puts a hand on Stiles’ calf. “The bite can heal sickness, but your mom’s brain was too far gone by the time we realized what she had was going to kill her. If my mom had bit her, your mom would still have those days where she wouldn’t be able to recognize you, and she couldn’t live like that. She refused to put you through that. I’m sorry, Stiles. I wish we could have done more. I wish we would have realized before.”

“Do you remember the scent of her sickness?” Stiles asks, sitting up. He needs to compartmentalize right now. He needs to know all the facts before he can fall apart again. Reacting out of pure emotion wasn’t his best moment. 

“No,” Laura admits, looking down. “My mom and Derek do, though. Why?” She looks back up, her face confused.

He nods and looks away. “I think I might have what she had.”

He glances at Laura, and her sad eyes is the exact reason why he looked away in the first place. He can’t handle the sadness in her eyes because he knows that his dad’s will look way worse when he finds out.

“You would have to ask my mom or Derek,” she tells him, her voice quiet. “I think it would be best to ask Derek. He’s really good at scent and....”

“And I need to tell him that it wasn’t his fault,” Stiles finishes for her. “I get that. It wasn’t his fault. He had to do what he could to protect his family.”

“And you,” Laura is quick to add. “You knowing this? It puts you at risk. There are people out there who wish to see us and anyone who ‘sympathizes’ with us dead. I don’t think Derek could survive it if you died because of us.”

That information takes the air out of Stiles’ chest like he fell hard on his back. He takes a moment to get his breathing back to normal as he processes all the information that’s running through his head. Everything in him is asking for a day to process all of this, but then he needs to know if he’s going to die soon. He needs to prepare his dad, Scott, Derek, and himself for that. 

“Can you take me back to your house?” Stiles asks Laura.

She nods immediately. “Of course. Do you need a milkshake before we go?” 

He breathes out a laugh. “Yes.”

She smiles and throws an arm around his shoulder, kissing his cheek. “Thank you for listening.”

He leans his head against hers, sighing out the breath he didn’t know he was holding. There’s so much tension inside of him, and Laura can probably feel it in his shoulders, but he doesn’t know how to let it go. Not yet. Not until he has all the information.

Laura follows him down the stairs and out the door to her car. He climbs after she unlocks it, and he’s silent until the reach the drive thru.

“What kind of shake?” Laura asks.

“Strawberry,” he says with a small smile.

They’re silent on the way to the house as they both sip at their shakes. Laura got chocolate because “It’s that time of the month,” she told him.

“The full moon?” he asked.

She laughed. “Not that. My period, dork.”

The tension is slowly leaking out, but the second they pull into the Hale’s driveway and he sees Derek sitting on the porch, it all comes back.

“I don’t know what to say,” Stiles whispers. “I was a jerk to him.”

“Sorry is always a good way to start,” Laura comments. “But remember, he has stuff to apologize for, too. It’s not just you in the wrong.”

He nods and takes one last sip of his shake before getting out of the car. Laura follows him out, but she walks straight into the house, running her hand over Derek’s head as she passes him.

Stiles stands in front of Derek awkwardly, chewing at his bottom lip. He doesn’t know how to ask for what he wants and apologize at the same time. He supposes the apology should come first.

“I was an asshole,” Stiles finally says.

Derek’s head snaps up, his eyes wide in shock. “No, Stiles - ”

“I was,” Stiles interrupts. “I reacted solely with my emotions, and it’s not like it wasn’t a scary situation for you either. I didn’t think about what you were going through. I was only thinking about me, and that’s not fair of me, especially when we’re in a relationship.”

“We’re in a relationship?” Derek asks, and the hope in his eyes breaks Stiles’ heart.

Stiles kneels on the step where Derek’s feet are resting, and he reaches for Derek’s face. “I’m pretty sure,” Stiles laughs, holding Derek’s face carefully. “I’m sorry.”

“I’m sorry,” Derek breathes out before closing the distance between them and kissing Stiles soundly. 

Stiles lets it go on for a couple minutes, letting himself enjoy the moment and relax for a second. Then he pulls back, leaning his forehead against Derek’s. “I need you to tell me something, though.”

“Anything,” Derek promises immediately. 

“Do I smell like my mom?” Stiles asks.

Derek pulls back to look at Stiles’ face with confusion. “A little, but she was family, so you will always carry her scent with you.”

“That’s actually really comforting to hear,” Stiles realizes. It’s like a part of his mom will always be with him, a part that Derek can sense for Stiles. “But that’s not what I meant. Do I smell like her sickness?”

“No,” Derek answers quickly. “You’re not sick, Stiles. I don’t know what’s going on with you, but you don’t have frontotemporal dementia.”

Stiles practically falls against Derek, burying his face in his neck. All the tension is gone, and Stiles is no longer wound up, waiting for the worst possible outcome. “Thank you,” Stiles whispers.

Derek holds onto him tightly, kissing the side of his head. “I’m sorry I called you crazy,” he says quietly. “I know it was going to hurt you, and I shouldn’t have done. I needed you safe, but I hurt you in the process.”

Stiles presses a kiss to Derek’s neck. “It’s okay. It’s okay.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> all better...?


	19. Chapter 19

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> make note of the rating change... ;)

It feels so weird going back to school the next day. It all seems so trivial compared to what happened yesterday, and Stiles feels like he needs a day to relax in bed maybe with Derek there to cuddle him. At least he has Derek by his side as they walk the halls hand in hand.

Scott smiles at them when they reach Stiles’ locker. “Look at the newlyweds.”

Stiles rolls his eyes, but laughs and then claps Scott on the shoulder. “I owe you a formal apology.”

Scott’s eyebrows scrunch together. “Uh, why?”

“For all the times I complained about how gross you and Allison are,” Stiles explains. “Derek and I are about to be about a million times worse.”

Scott laughs, closing his locker. “Glad to hear it, buddy.” Then he looks at Derek with his serious face. “If you do anything to hurt him, I will kill you.”

Stiles tries not to laugh too hard because Scott is being serious, and it’s not like he knows that Derek is a werewolf and can easily heal from anything Scott does to him. 

“I won’t hurt him,” Derek promises solemnly with a nod.

“Good,” Scott says, looking satisfied with Derek’s answer. “I gotta get to class now. See you guys at lunch.”

Stiles waves at his best friend as he walks away and then opens his own locker, shoving his backpack in it and taking out what he needs for first period. “I wish I didn’t have to be here today,” Stiles sighs.

“You had a rough weekend emotionally,” Derek comments, stepping beside Stiles and putting a hand on his lower back. 

“We should ditch,” Stiles jokes.

Derek shrugs. “Maybe we should. You need to rest.”

Stiles leans to the side into Derek and thinks about it for a second before grabbing his backpack again. “Let’s go.” 

Derek is quick to follow Stiles out to the parking lot. It’s simple for them to sneak out to the parking lot and into Stiles’ car. No one really monitors anything around here anyway. It’s Beacon Hills. What’s the worst that could happen? 

Oh, yeah. There could be a whole pack/family of werewolves. 

“What are you laughing at?” Derek asks, looking amused.

“Just the thought that everyone thinks Beacon Hills is so safe except, you know, there are  _ werewolves _ .” Stiles laughs.

Derek rolls his eyes. “We’re perfectly safe to be around. Obviously.”

“I mean, I haven’t been harmed, and I’m really annoying, so you all must have superb self control.”

Derek snorts. “Yeah. Which is exactly why I accidentally bit your lip. My superb self control.”

At a stop sign, Stiles looks over at Derek with an eyebrow raised. “Are you saying you find me so enticingly attractive that you can’t control yourself around me?”

Derek smirks. “When you’re on top of me, it’s a little hard to think, yeah.”

Stiles looks forward again and keeps driving. “Good to know,” he says softly.

It’s only another couple of minutes before Stiles is pulling into his driveway. Fortunately, Stiles’ dad is working today and won’t be home until later, so there’s no need to sneak into the house. 

When they’re inside, Stiles grabs a couple drinks from the fridge and follows Derek up the stairs to his room. Derek toes off his shoes and then throws himself on Stiles’ bed.

“Tired?” Stiles asks, toeing his own shoes off, setting the drinks down, and then sitting next to Derek.

Derek shifts so that his head is resting on Stiles’ thigh. He looks up at Stiles with a soft, sleepy smile. “A little, yeah. I didn’t sleep much this weekend.”

“Me neither,” Stiles says, leaning towards the nightstand that is holding their drinks. He pops open the can of Sprite and takes a sip. “I think napping sounds like a great idea right about now.”

Derek rolls onto his side, throwing an arm over Stiles’ legs. “Hmm napping. Or...”

“Or?” Stiles questions, raising his eyebrow while looking down at Derek.

With a smug smile, Derek sits up, grabs Stiles’ drink and puts it back on the nightstand. “Or we could...” He leans closer and brushes his lips against Stiles’.

“We could definitely do that,” Stiles immediately agrees, grabbing Derek’s face in both hands and pulling him closer. Derek places a hand on Stiles’ neck and his other on Stiles’ hip. He yanks on Stiles’ hip enough to make Stiles straddle his lap. 

“Okay this is a good position for me,” Stiles says when he takes a breath, but Derek is quickly chasing after his lips. Stiles slides a hand to the back of Derek’s head to play and tug on Derek’s hair, making him moan into the kiss. God, Stiles wonders how he could ever think about giving this up. The noises Derek makes? The way his breath gets so uneven when he’s this close to Stiles? It’s the best. Stiles will never give this up again.

Derek’s hands slide under Stiles’ shirt, and his hands are so warm against Stiles’ back that he leans into them. The hands on Stiles’ back keep wandering up and down while Stiles and Derek kiss and fuck, why are either of them still wearing a shirt.

Stiles pulls back and leans back further when Derek tries to follow him. “Hang on,” Stiles laughs. He pulls his shirt over his head and tosses it to the floor. Then he grabs the end of Derek’s shirt and tugs it up. It takes a moment for Derek to remove his hands from Stiles so that they get his shirt off, but he finally does, and Stiles is quick to get the shirt off.

But he’s not as quick as Derek is to start kissing Stiles’ neck. Stiles can feel Derek’s heavy breath on his skin, and it feels almost as amazing as Derek’s lips and teeth and tongue working down to his collarbone. 

“Fuck,” Stiles exhales. He really didn’t know his neck could be this sensitive, but Derek is hitting all the right places like he’s been doing this for years. Why haven’t they been doing this for years? So much wasted time. Time that they get to make up for now.

Stiles holds Derek tighter and brings him down with him as Stiles lays down on the bed. Derek doesn’t miss a beat in his goal of kissing every part of Stiles’ neck and collarbones. One of Derek’s hands is supporting himself while the other slides down Stiles’ torso only to stop at the button of Stiles’ jeans.

“Yes,” Stiles adamantly consents. “Please.”

Derek lifts his head to go back to kissing Stiles’ mouth as his hand unbuttons Stiles’ jeans and pulls the zipper down. Stiles lifts his hips and helps pull down his pants so that Derek can wrap his hand around him over his underwear. 

Stiles is not even a little embarrassed at how loud he moans. He is, however, grateful that Derek’s mouth was on his to muffle the sound. Derek’s hand felt warm and amazing on his back, but on his dick? Fuck, that’s something Stiles didn’t know he needed this badly.

Derek squeezes softly and then runs his hand back up Stiles’ stomach just to run his nails back down, making Stiles arch into him.

Then Stiles is struck with how much he needs to get his hands on Derek’s dick. He quickly gets his hands to the button of Derek’s jeans and stops.

“Please,” Derek exhales.

Once he’s gotten consent, Stiles unbuttons Derek’s pants and pulls them down. Then he slides a hand under Derek’s underwear and wraps his fingers around Derek’s dick. Derek’s breath hitches as he leans his forehead against Stiles’. His own hand slides under Stiles’ under and wraps around him. 

Stiles shoots up to kiss Derek as he starts pumping his hand. Derek feverishly returns the kiss as his hand starts moving.

“Do you have any lube?” Derek asks breathlessly.

“Yes, great idea.” Stiles stretches his arm towards his nightstand and opens the drawer. His hand fumbles around in there as he searches for the lube. Derek starts kissing his neck again, and it’s very distracting, but also Stiles has a very serious goal. He finds what he’s looking for and quickly pumps some lube into his hand. Immediately, his hand is wrapped around Derek again, who lets out a grunt.

Derek grabs the lube and rests his weight on his forearms so he can get lube onto his hand. He’s fast about it and then suddenly there’s wet heat on Stiles’ dick, and he swears loudly because this is the best. Everything about Derek is the best.

It’s quick and messy and perfect in every way. Stiles finishes first, and Derek follows quickly. Unsurprisingly, it’s Derek who has enough energy to grab a shirt from the floor to wipe up their mess. Then he tosses it towards the hamper and rolls onto his side.

Stiles pulls his underwear back up and kicks off his jeans. He rolls onto his side and snuggles close to Derek, kissing his bare chest. “That was amazing.”

“You’re amazing,” Derek sighs, wrapping an arm around Stiles and rubbing his back. 

“Stay with me forever?” Stiles asks sleepily.

“Forever,” Derek whispers before they both fall asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> you're welcome


	20. Chapter 20

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i know it's a few days late, but i wasn't feeling it for a couple days. here it is, though!!

Stiles still goes to the MRI. It sucks. He takes the anti anxiety pills his doctor gave him beforehand and had Derek drive him. It’s a lot of loud noises and sitting perfectly still, but he didn’t feel claustrophobic. The pills helped. A lot. He’s glad he took them.

“You know you don’t need it, right?” Derek asked in the waiting room before Stiles went back.

“Yeah, but I’d like the concrete evidence,” Stiles told him. “Plus, there has to be  _ something _ going on. Just not anything deadly.”

Derek nodded and accepted that.

He follows up with his doctor in a couple of days, but he feels like he owes a visit to Derek’s mother. Maybe it’s the anti anxiety meds helping, but he feels brave enough to let Derek drive him to his house. 

Stiles knocks on her office door even though she probably already knew he was there. She calls him in, and he opens the door, slowly closing it behind him.

Once he’s seated in front of her desk, not unlike sitting in the principal’s office, he says, “I’m sorry.”

Talia’s entire face softens, and she reaches across the desk to grab his hand. “Stiles,” she says, her voice calm and melodic. “You don’t have to apologize for anything. That wasn’t the way we meant for you to find out, but it was a lot of information to take in at once, information that wasn’t all that good. You took it as well as you could have.”

He squeezes her hand and nods. “Thank you. I’m glad my mom had you as a friend.”

“I’m glad to have had her as a friend. As you know, she was a very special person.”

“She was,” he whispers, hating that he has to talk about her in past tense.

Talia squeezes his hand and then releases it. “I’m glad you stopped by. I wanted to talk to you about something if you feel like you’re ready for some more information.”

Of course, he perks up. How could he not? More information? He always wants more information and says as much.

Talia laughs. “Okay, okay. It’s not so much of information as it is an offer. Derek and I have talked about it extensively.”

“Okay...,” he says, getting a little worried. Why were they talking about him? What was Derek telling his mom?

She smiles at him kindly. “Nothing bad, Stiles. I promise. It’s an offer that I hope you know you can refuse or think about or wait on answering.”

“What is it?” he asks immediately, needing to know.

“Would you like to be a part of our pack?” she asks, looking him right in the eye very seriously. “This is not an offer I make lightly or often. I hope you know that this is a serious matter and should be treated as such. It comes with responsibilities, and it comes with danger, of course. I have also discussed it with your father. He believes you are old enough and capable of making your own decisions.”

Stiles takes it all in, and takes a moment to think about it. “Can I ask for more details?”

“Of course. What part do you want clarification on?”

“What are the responsibilities?” he asks.

She leans back in her chair, looking a little more comfortable now that the offer is out there and in his hands. “It’s similar to being part of a family, but there’s also more to it than that. We ask that you attend pack meetings and join us for our full moon runs. You don’t have to run of course,” she adds when Stiles opens his mouth to tell her she was overestimating his athletic abilities. “It’s more than that, and we’d love for you to be part of it.”

“We?” he asks. “You said you talked to Derek about it, so he’s okay with it?”

She nods. “It was his idea, and I have to say, it’s a wonderful idea, and we’d be honored to have someone like you in our pack.”

It feels really nice to hear something like that coming from an authority figure. Stiles doesn’t have many good experiences with authority, but he has always gotten along with Talia. It’s also a really good feeling that Derek wants Stiles to join his pack. From what Talia said, it’s a big deal. The fact that Derek likes him enough to want Stiles in his pack says something, something big.

“What makes being in your pack dangerous?” he asks.

“You’re asking very good, insightful questions,” she comments. “I’m glad. I want you to go into this as prepared as you can be. To answer your question, there are werewolf hunters that live in Beacon Hills. We have a treaty, but they have been known to go against it. Not recently, however. There are also other creatures out there that have a thirst for blood. Human, werewolf, or otherwise. The woods are a good place to hide for a lot of them, so we do our best to prepare ourselves for the worst.”

Stiles nods, his mind running through the new information. It’s not just werewolves out there. Good to know. “But you guys would protect me, right?”

“Of course,” she says immediately. “Even if you declined the offer, we’d still protect you and welcome you into our family as we always have. However, we would also try to prepare you to protect yourself. You are a lot stronger than you think, Stiles. There’s a lot more to you than meets the eye.”

He’s not sure he believes her, but there’s something in her words that make him think she knows something he doesn’t. “What do you mean?”

She smiles, looking proud of him. “Of course you would hear the double meaning. I mean that you are what we call a spark.”

“Okay?” he says, confused when she doesn’t clarify. “So what does that mean?”

“We aren’t entirely sure,” she answers honestly. “We know very little about sparks. That is a question best suited for Dr. Deaton.”

“The vet?” Stiles asks, raising an eyebrow in disbelief. “A vet will know what a spark is?”

“He should know as he is one himself.”

“How do you know I am one?” Stiles asks.

“We can sense that kind of thing,” Talia tells him, tapping her nose twice before putting her hand back on the desk. “I do know that you would be quite useful to have in our pack besides your other talents.”

Now that’s ridiculous. “Other talents? Not fishing for compliments, but what other talents?”

“Your brain,” she is quick to answer. “You’re very smart and observant. You retain information well and process it quickly. All good assets to have.”

He isn’t sure he believes her, but she isn’t someone to disagree with. 

“What do you think about our offer?” she asks.

“Is it a forever thing?” he asks. “What would happen if Derek and I broke up?”

She frowns at that. “All of us hope that doesn’t happen, but if you and Derek broke up, would you still want to remain friends?”

Stiles quickly nods. “He is one of my best friends. I would never want to fully lose him.”

“Then I think we could eventually find a way to work together in a cordial manner.” She sounds so sure of this that Stiles believes her.

“You didn’t answer my question. Is it a forever thing?”

She takes a moment to answer, but she finally does. “Yes, it is, and we would consider any family of yours as pack as well.”

“So my dad would be pack?” 

She nods once. “He would also be a great asset to have in our pack.”

“Because he’s the sheriff,” Stiles guesses.

She smiles. “Precisely.” It’s silent for a moment before she asks, “Do you want some time to think about the offer?”

He shakes his head. “I’ve made my decision.”

She raises her eyebrows and waits for him to speak again.

“I accept.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> lots of info i know, and if you follow me on tumblr, you might've seen that i was like "oh sweet only a couple more chapters of this fic!"  
> but then i had more plot ideas and well... hold on tight. we're not done yet ;)


	21. Chapter 21

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> iiiiiiiit's Monday!!!!!

Stiles didn’t quite expect things to change so quickly, but there is one thing that definitely changed. Everyone in the pack touches him more. It’s a hand on his shoulder, a couple seconds longer of a hug, and a head on his shoulder when he’s sitting on the couch. It’s all very comforting and platonic. 

Except Derek. Derek’s touching is definitely not platonic, and he touches Stiles a lot more than anyone else. He kisses Stiles more and leaves his hand on Stiles’ neck for a few minutes at a time. Derek nuzzles into his neck, too. It’s... difficult for Stiles. Not that he doesn’t love it because he most certainly does, but it’s hard to, um, stay... focused around Derek now. And knowing that everyone can smell if he’s turned on by Derek? That doesn’t help anything.

Fortunately, Derek is still a little distant at school as in they don’t do a lot of PDA. As soon as they’re back at either of their houses, though, it’s fair game. Especially if there are no parents around.

“God,” Stiles groans as Derek comes up behind him and lightly scrapes his teeth over Stiles’ neck. “I gotta focus on this essay, Der.”

“But you smell like other people,” Derek mumbles in his neck. “I don’t like it.”

Despite what Stiles just said, he still leans his head back up against Derek’s chest and lets him kiss and nibble and nuzzle his neck. Mainly because it feels  _ so good _ . He didn’t know his neck would be that sensitive, yet here he is.

After a few minutes, Derek pulls back and goes to sit on Stiles’ bed. “You smell better now,” he says.

“Oh good,” Stiles responds, sounding a little breathless, but he’s ignoring that. “Now can I work on my math homework?”

“Sure,” Derek says. 

“How nice of you,” Stile mumbles, staring down at his notebook and trying to get his breathing back to normal.

“When is your appointment with the psychiatrist?” Derek asks.

Stiles thumps his head on his desk partly because Derek distracted him  _ again _ , and partly because he doesn’t want to talk about this. “Thursday,” he answers quietly.

Derek hums, but doesn’t actually respond, so Stiles goes back to his homework that’s due tomorrow, so he really needs to focus.

Except there’s the fact that Derek is on his bed. Just sitting on his bed, watching him, and Stiles  _ knows _ how good it would feel if he just sat in Derek’s lap and kissed him. It would be  _ much _ better than homework that’s for sure. It’s hard to think about equations and solving them when Derek is  _ right there _ . 

“I need a reward system,” Stiles sighs. He spins in his chair to look at Derek. “If I finish this within an hour, can I give you a blowjob?”

Derek’s eyebrows raise in shock, but he nods. “Y-y-yeah, that’s cool with me.”

“Cool. Now be quiet for the next hour and stop being distracting.”

“How am I supposed to do that?” Derek asks.

Stiles shrugs. “Not my problem right now. You figure it out.”

Derek stands up and walks out of the room, and that works pretty well actually. Stiles finishes his homework in forty-five minutes and immediately calls for Derek to come back up once he’s done. 

**************

“You’re having trouble focusing?” the psychiatrist, Dr. Morrell asks. “Is that correct?”

Stiles nods. “But it’s not just that. I keep forgetting things like the word for an object or to go to the store or to even brush my teeth. It’s getting really hard to find where I set things even when I’ve set them in the same places for years.”

“You value your routine?” she asks, tilting her head slightly, her long, dark hair falling over one shoulder. 

“I guess?” Stiles says, scratching the back of his neck. He sighs in frustration. “I feel like I have no control over my brain anymore.”

“Is control something you must have?” she asks.

He’s getting real tired of her asking so many questions, but he answers them because he wants to get to the bottom of this. His primary doctor suggested a psychiatrist since the CT came back clear.

“It’s not something I  _ need _ really. It’s more of something that I’d like because I feel like I have zero self control.”

She nods and writes something down on the clipboard on her lap. She tucks her hair behind her ears and then looks back up to Stiles. “How long have you been experiencing this?” she asks.

Stiles thinks about it for a moment. “It’s become a bigger problem lately, but thinking about it, it’s been years. I can’t remember a time that I’ve had self control.”

“Okay,” she says, writing something else down. “Do you blurt a lot in class?”

It’s a very specific question, but Stiles answers honestly. “Yeah.”

“Do you have a hard time being patient?” she asks. “For example, is it hard to wait your turn in lines?”

He shrugs. “I just end up fidgeting a lot and checking my phone every five seconds.”

“What were you like in a classroom as a kid?” she asks.

“These are really specific questions,” he points out. “Do you have a diagnosis in mind?”

She smiles softly. “You’re very observant. I have a theory, but I’d like to continue to get more information from you before I confirm or deny it.”

And well, that’s fair. “I was a troublemaker honestly. I still am actually. It’s hard to sit still for that long and listen. I’ve gotten to the point where I doodle in my notebook or take really extensive, color coordinated notes. That helps me focus.”

“Can you go into more detail please?” 

He sighs, leaning back in the chair as he stares at the blue covers over the lights that make it seem a little more calming in the office. “I always got in trouble for interrupting,” he finally says. “As I said before. I blurt out the answers. I fidget too much. I have to get up and move around, and that got me in more trouble. Eventually, I learned that if I just ask to go to the bathroom even if I don’t have to go, that helps. Walking around the halls for a couple minutes helps.”

As he talks, Dr. Morrell writes on her clipboard. When he’s done, she looks up thoughtfully. “How do you do socially?” she asks.

“Socially?” Stiles repeats. “Uh, like I have a boyfriend and a best friend and a few good friends, but I don’t do much socializing outside of that.”

“Why not?” she asks.

“I feel like I’m really annoying to talk to. I go on tangents a lot like the other day I was talking to my best friend, Scott, and we were discussing lacrosse strategies and I somehow ended up on the topic of male circumcision. I’m not sure how.”

She nods and taps her pen on her clipboard once. “You seem very controlled right now,” she comments. “You do not feel comfortable, do you?”

He shrugs. “It’s not like you’re doing anything to make me uncomfortable. I’m just not good in new settings.”

She hums and looks to the side for a moment as she thinks. “I’d like to go down another line of questioning if that’s okay with you.”

“Sure, go ahead.” Might as well get his money’s worth by using the full hour given.

“When you say you can’t sit still, what is going through your head during those times?”

He looks down and notices his knee bouncing. “Uh, nothing. It’s just so automatic.” He looks back up at her, and Dr. Morrell is staring intently at him.

“What does fidgeting help you accomplish?” she asks.

He shrugs. “I just feel like something is buzzing under my skin and the only way to make it stop is to move, do something, anything.”

“When talking to people you’re not comfortable with, how do you feel?”

Stiles takes stock of how he’s feeling right now. “My heart...it’s faster and I feel like my hands are sweaty.” He shakes his head, trying to get his thoughts to line up. “There’s this fear that I’m going to say the wrong thing. I can feel it in my stomach almost like I’m gonna throw up.”

“How well do you sleep?” she asks.

He snorts. “I get maybe five hours if I’m lucky a night. There’s just so much swimming through my head. I can’t get it to shut up enough to fall asleep.”

“Would you say that you get anxiety often?”

“Anxiety?” Stiles asks, raising his eyebrows. “Uh, I don’t know. How do I know if I’m feeling anxious?”

“The sweaty hands, the fear of saying the wrong thing, and the thoughts swimming. How often does that happen?”

He chews on his bottom lip as he thinks of the answer. “Every day probably. It’s worse in public like at school or in a store.”

She nods and goes back to writing. She writes for long enough that Stiles starts to fidget again.

“What is your theory?” he asks. “Anxiety?”

Dr. Morrell looks back up and smiles softly, nodding once. “I was also thinking possibly ADHD. Our session is almost up, but I’d really like to see you again to get a deeper understanding before I treat you for anything. Will that be okay with you?”

“If you treat me for these things and they don’t get better, what then?” he asks.

“Then we talk more to see if I missed something. But if I do treat you and it gets better then I’m right.” She spins in her chair and gets onto her computer. “I’m going to print out some articles about anxiety and ADHD for you. Feel free to do your own research about it. We can talk about it next time.”

“Oh, great. Homework.”

She laughs once, still staring at the screen. “This isn’t for a grade. I won’t be mad or disappointed if you come to the next session and haven’t done any research. It’s okay if you don’t. Just a suggestion.”

He nods and taps his fingers on the arm on the chair until her printer is done. She grabs the papers and hands them to him before walking him to the front desk where he makes another appointment for the next week.

“Have a good day,” she says with a smile before walking away.

Stiles grips the articles she gave him the whole way to his car. He didn’t notice his hands were shaking until the papers started making noise. Once he’s in his car, he takes a deep breath to calm himself then drives straight to the Hale house.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry this has been so dialogue and info heavy. there will be action in a couple chapters. probably.


	22. Chapter 22

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay i'm really sorry, but no one reminded me that it was monday yesterday so i completely forgot to post the chapter. I'M SORRY

“Stiles?” Derek asks, his voice sounding worried as he steps out the door.

Stiles doesn’t exactly run to Derek, but, um, he definitely runs to Derek and wraps his arms around him. 

“What’s wrong?” Derek catches Stiles easily and holds him close. He kisses Stiles’ neck and rubs his back. “What did the doctor say?”   
“I might have ADHD,” Stiles says against Derek’s shoulder. 

“Okay,” Derek says, still rubbing Stiles’ back.

Stiles rubs his face against Derek’s shoulder and pulls back enough to rest his forehead against Derek’s. “And anxiety,” Stiles sighs.

“I can smell that,” Derek tells him with a soft laugh.

Stiles falls further into Derek, who just holds him more securely. “Of course you can.”

After a few minutes, Stiles finally breaks away from Derek so they can go inside and up to his room. Stiles falls onto the bed and sprawls. 

“You’re taking up my whole bed,” Derek tells him.

Stiles shrugs while staring at the ceiling. The bed dips as Derek climbs on and then he’s resting his head on Stiles’ chest.

“Is having ADHD and anxiety so bad?” Derek asks quietly.

Stiles shakes his head and rests an arm on Derek’s back, his fingers going to play with Derek’s hair. “It’s not. It’s just... I don’t know. Having words to explain what’s going on, something actually going on... it’s a lot, you know?”

“It is a lot. Do you want to talk more about the appointment?”

Stiles shakes his head again even though Derek can’t see him. “There wasn’t a lot to it. I’ll see her again and she’ll give me a firmer diagnosis once she knows more. For now, can we just lay together?”

“Yeah, of course,” Derek says, tilting his head up towards Stiles to give him a quick kiss. 

“What’s up, losers?” someone who sounds suspiciously like Cora calls from the doorway.

Stiles lifts his head up enough to see the door and waves a hand. “Sup.”

Cora comes in and sits on Derek’s desk chair. “You okay, Stiles? You smell sad.”

“This sucks,” Stiles mumbles. “I can’t hide anything from you guys.”

“Do you want to?” Derek asks, lifting his head so his chin is resting on Stiles’ chest.

“Not particularly. But sometimes I don’t want to have a deep talk about my feelings.”

“Ugh,” Cora fake gags. “Talks about feelings? No thanks. I just want to know if you’re okay. I don’t need the details.”

“I’m okay,” Stiles says, laying his head back down.

“I think you need ice cream,” Cora announces, and it sounds like she stands up. “Chocolate, strawberry, or mint chocolate chip?”

Since Stiles likes all of those flavors, he says, “Surprise me.”

She laughs and walks out. 

Derek tilts his head so his cheek is on Stiles’ chest now and looks up at Stiles. “I love that you’re close with my family. I love that you know now, and we don’t have to keep everything a secret.”

Stiles smiles softly down at Derek. “I love those things too. I like being in the know, you know?”

Derek snorts. “You’re a dork.”

“I’m your dork.”

And that makes Derek smile like an absolute dork, which Stiles is sure to tell him.

*******************

“Stiles?” 

“Shit,” Stiles hisses under his breath. Of course Scott is still here. Of course coming early was a  _ bad _ idea and that he would be spotted lurking at the back of the vet clinic near the dumpster. He half thinks about jumping in it to hide, but Scott is already out the door.

“Stiles, what are you doing here?” Scott asks, his eyebrows furrowed. 

“Just, uh. Saying what’s up to you. Miss you, buddy.”

Scott softens at that. “I miss you, too. We’ve been pretty wrapped up with Allison and Derek, huh?”

“Literally,” Stiles snorts. 

Scott rolls his eyes, but he’s smiling, so Stiles takes it as a win. “Too bad we have school tomorrow. My mom saw last quarter’s report card and said I can’t go anywhere on school nights except work.”

“Sucks, man,” Stiles commiserates.

“Sorry you come here for nothing. I’m about to leave as soon as throw this stuff away...” Scott gestures to the trash bag in his hand, and looks back at Stiles with so much disappointment.

“What are you doing this weekend? Maybe we can have a sleepover or something. Lots of video games, Mountain Dew, and trash talking each other.”

Scott smiles widely. “Sounds great, dude.” He throws the trash bag into the dumpster and takes a step closer to Stiles before stepping back. “I’d hug you, but, uh, my hands are gross.”

Stiles nods. “I appreciate your thoughtfulness.” He claps Scott on the shoulder before he turns around and walks inside. 

Great. What is Stiles going to do now? He can’t just wait out here until Deaton is ready. Scott will notice the Jeep still in the parking lot when he leaves. This is how Stiles ends up grabbing fries from the only McDonald’s in town. They’re cold and hard, which makes Stiles feel like he just wasted his money. Maybe he should ask Talia to reimburse him as it is her fault he’s here. Kind of... 

“Stiles,” Deaton greets. “You’re late.”

Stiles glares at him, but doesn’t give any excuses. “So, do we just jump right into this conversation or what?”

Deaton gives him a small, slightly amused smile. “I suppose we can. Follow me.” 

Stiles listens and follows Deaton through the back and into his office where Deaton sits at his desk and gestures for Stiles to sit in front of him, so he does. “How do you even know about werewolves?” Stiles wonders aloud, leaning back into the chair and stretching his legs out as far as he can.

“My family has been working closely with the Hale’s for a very long time,” Deaton answers. “My mother was the pack’s emissary before myself.”

“The pack’s what now?” Stiles asks, confused already. “You’re gonna have to slow down, Doc. I only just found out like five days ago.”

Deaton smiles apologetically. “Right. An emissary is sort of a diplomat for packs. We handle the politics between packs. If two werewolves marry, whose pack do they go to? Whose territory is whose? Where are the lines of morality like biting a human to make another werewolf? We are meant to be the logical voice in the midst of werewolves being bested by their instincts.”

Stiles nods along, trying to understand everything he can. “So being an emissary is your family tradition?”

“Sort of,” Deaton answers. “My grandfather was an emissary for the Hale’s, and my great grandmother was one. As long as the Hale’s have called this their territory, the Deaton’s have been around to help them in any way we can.”

“How do you help?” Stiles asks. “Or I guess, I mean, what can  _ I _ do to help?”

Deaton sits back, resting his elbows on the arms of his chair and clasping his hands together in front of his mouth as he thinks. “There are certain things that werewolves cannot do that humans can. For example, mountain ash.”

“What is mountain ash?”

“It’s a substance that can be used in many different ways. The most common way to use it is to create a barrier. With the help of a spark, the barrier can trap any supernatural creature. Its powers cannot be activated by anyone else.”

“There’s that word again,” Stiles groans. “Spark. What is a spark? That’s the whole reason I’m even here.”

“Yes, it is,” Deaton agrees. “It’s a long winded answer that I have for you, so listen carefully as I’m not inclined to repeat all of this again.”

Stiles nods and sits up straighter. “Hit me.”

“As long as there have been werewolves and humans and emissaries, there have been sparks.” Deaton pauses for a moment to think through his next words. “Sparks can be very powerful if trained properly. A lot of humans may go their whole lives not realizing they’re a spark because they don’t know anything about the supernatural world.”

“But I’m a spark?” Stiles asks.

“You are,” Deaton says with a nod. “As I am one too, I can sense it from you, and Alpha Hale can as well.”

“So what does a spark do? Are all emissaries sparks? Are all sparks emissaries?”

Deaton laughs once. “A lot of questions, and I do have answers. A spark protects the pack in any way they can, much like an emissary. Some sparks like to be part of the packs too. They get attached to their packs as they would family, as I’m sure you understand.”

Stiles nods because he understands that very well.

“Sparks don’t have to be as diplomatic as emissaries do. However, a spark can be an emissary, and an emissary can be a spark. It’s not a requirement by any means to be a spark. I happen to be one, but my mother wasn’t. I happen to not use my spark often either for many reasons. One of them being that there aren’t many fights here in the Hale territory anymore, and another being that I’m uninterested in being part of the pack. I am happy to help, but that is where my interest ends.”

Stiles nods, resting against the back of the chair again. “Shit, this is so much information. I don’t even know what to do with it.”

“Do with it what you want,” Deaton tells him, leaning forward to rest his elbows on his desk. “Don’t let anyone pressure you to do something you don’t want.”

“What are my options?” Stiles asks.

“Train with me to learn more about your spark, or let it be. Simply be a human in a pack of werewolves. They will teach you how to fight and will protect you at all costs. Although, if you decide to train then you could be able to protect yourself much better. You would be a very good asset to the pack as sparks are very rare nowadays.”

Stiles takes a deep breath, his mind reeling with all the information. He rubs a hand over his mouth and sighs. “I don’t know what I want yet.”

“That’s okay,” Deaton is quick to assure him. “You have time. Not everything has to be figured out now.”

“Okay, good.”

They sit in silence for a moment until there’s pounding on a glass door. Deaton jumps up, and Stiles is quick to follow. They go out into the waiting room, and at the front door is someone banging against it with bloody fists.

“Help!” the person screams, and Stiles would recognize that voice anywhere.

Scott.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oh, hey. look, more plot. i'm never gonna find the end of this fic. it's gonna go on forever


	23. Chapter 23

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ...life happened sorry it's late.

Stiles has never run faster in his life to get to the front door of the animal clinic. After unlocking and opening the door, Scott falls into the waiting room. He groans loudly, clutching his side and curling up.

Deaton is right behind Stiles and helps him lift Scott. Stiles shoves his hands under Scott’s armpits as Deaton grabs his legs, and they carry him into an exam room as per Deaton’s command. Once they’re in there, they lift Scott onto the exam table that is a little too small for Scott, but it’s all they have.

“Scotty,” Stiles says, hearing the worry in his own voice. “What happened?”

Scott’s answer is a groan, his eyes squeezed shut from the pain. 

Stiles turns to Deaton. “Do you have any painkillers that could help him?”

“I need to know what happened before I give him any drugs,” Deaton tells him, looking at Scott’s side.

Stiles focuses his eyes where Deaton is looking and sees a lot of blood. He gags because blood has always grossed him out, but this is his best friend, and his best friend is in trouble.

With a newfound purpose, Stiles grabs Scott’s face. “Scott, look at me. Tell me what happened.”

“A wolf,” Scott barely gets out. “A wolf bit me.”

“That’s impossible,” Stiles mumbles. “There haven’t been wolves in California in like sixty years.” But when he looks up, he realizes that there are other wolves in Beacon Hills.

“Stiles,” Deaton says calmly, “you need to call Alpha Hale right now.”

It doesn’t take long for Talia to walk through the door of the exam room, eyes flashing red and focusing on Deaton. “What happened?” she asks, but her voice is different. Harder and more commanding than her usual soft, motherly tone.

Deaton shakes his head. “We don’t know.”

“Scott was banging on the door while we were talking, and he said a wolf bit him,” Stiles relays and swallows hard. “Is he gonna be okay?”

“Can I look at him?” she asks, looking at Stiles for an answer.

“Of course,” Stiles answers, confused why it’s up to him. Maybe because Stiles is the closest thing Scott has to family right now. 

She walks over with purpose and goes over to where Deaton is standing. They removed Scott’s shirt after Stiles called Talia and saw the giant bite on his side. The bleeding has slowed considerably, but there’s still blood dripping down his side and onto the floor.

Talia frowns at the bite and holds her hand out for something. Fortunately, Deaton knows what she needs and hands her a pair of gloves. She snaps them out and gently probes at the bite. Scott has passed out from the pain, so at least Stiles doesn’t have to hear his cries anymore. They were really driving Stiles crazy because there’s nothing he can do to help. It’s almost like his mom.

Stiles remembers sitting in the hospital room with her. She was on an IV with fluids and pain meds dripping into her constantly. Most of the time, she was sleeping, but when she was awake, she was either crying out in pain, or screaming at Stiles to get away from her. 

“Don’t hurt me!” she would scream. “Help! Help! He’s trying to kill me.”

Stiles much preferred her sleeping. At least that way, she seemed peaceful, and he could hold her hand and whisper about his day at school. At least that way, she almost seemed like his mom.

But now isn’t the time to be thinking about his mom. Scott is on the table in front of him with a werewolf bite, and Talia is looking concerned.

“Did you find any fangs?” she asks Deaton.

“No.”

“And it’s not too deep?” she questions, looking at Deaton.

He shakes his head. “It doesn’t seem to have hit any internal organs.”

She sighs and slowly takes off the gloves. “Laura should be here soon,” she says to the room and then looks at Stiles. “Can you call Derek please? I wasn’t sure what I was walking into, but I knew he wouldn’t be any help if you were hurt. However, he could be very useful for Scott right now.”

“How?” Stiles asks.

“Please just call him,” she says softly, rubbing her forehead and looking exhausted.

“Stiles? What’s going on?” Derek immediately answers.

“Your mom wants you here,” Stiles says, trying not to sound as panicked as he feels because he  _ knows _ Derek will pick up on it.

“Where’s here?” Derek asks, and there’s muffling on the other side of the phone like he’s moving around. “Why does she need me?”

“Deaton’s clinic, and she didn’t say why. You just need to come. Please.”

“I’ll be there in five,” Derek tells him and then hangs up.

Stiles goes back to the table and grabs Scott’s hand. “Don’t worry, buddy. You’re gonna be okay.” Then he looks up at Deaton and Talia. “Shouldn’t we take him to a hospital? He’s going to need stitches.”

Talia shakes her head, but Deaton is the one who talks. “I’m afraid hospitals are not equipped to handle werewolf bites. However, I am well stocked to do so.”

“Oh,” is all Stiles can say.

Talia’s head turns towards the waiting room. “Derek and Laura are here.”

Sure enough, they both walk into the room, both looking confused.

“Mom, what’s going on?” Laura asks.

Derek walks straight to Stiles, looking him up and down, searching for something. “You’re okay, right?”

“I am,” Stiles answers.

“You don’t smell okay,” Derek says with a frown and then looks at the table. “What happened to Scott?”

“He was bit,” Talia says, and there is so much meaning behind her words. They sound so simple, but there’s a power behind them. 

“By a werewolf?” Laura asks, walking up to the table to see for herself. “There’s a rogue alpha on our territory?”

“There must be,” Talia sighs, shaking her head in disbelief. “I don’t know how I didn’t catch it sooner. Stiles,” she says, looking up at him with sadness in her eyes, “I am so sorry I let this happen.”

Stiles shakes his head. “Please stop. There’s no way you could have known.”

“There were no signs,” Laura says quietly. “This alpha knows what they’re doing.”

Scott sits straight up, gasping. “Where am I?” he asks, looking around, eyes wide with panic. “Stiles?” His eyes land on Stiles, looking for an explanation.

“Hey, buddy,” Stiles says softly, walking up to him slowly. 

“What happened?” he asks, looking down at his side with a frown. “I swear this was way worse.”

Stiles’ eyes follow, seeing that the bite on Scott’s side has healed a significant amount in the last half hour. “You were bit by something,” Stiles finally answers.

Scott’s head snaps back up and looks around at all the people here. “What’s Derek doing here? And who are they?” His chin jerks at Talia and Laura who are standing by Scott’s feet. 

“I’m Talia Hale,” Talia introduces herself. “This is my daughter Laura, and you know my son, Derek.”

“Why are you guys here?” Scott asks, confused. “It’s just a wolf bite. It’s not even that bad.”

Talia looks at Laura and nods, so Laura steps up. “Scott, what we’re about to say is going to sound really ridiculous, and you’re going to think we’re making thing, but I can promise you I am telling the complete truth.”

“I can vouch for them,” Stiles tells Scott. “They are telling the truth.”

Scott nods and looks back at Laura, who takes a deep breath before she speaks again.

“We’re werewolves.”


	24. Chapter 24

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry it's late! but here it is!

“Werewolves?” Scott repeats questioningly. He looks at Stiles, then Laura, Derek, and finally at Talia. “You’re joking, right?”

“Well, you said a wolf bit you, didn’t you?” Stiles asks. “Since there are no wolves in California, and I happen to know a whole pack of werewolves, it would make sense that werewolves exist.”

“So you’re saying you knew the Hale’s are werewolves?” Scott asks, eyebrows shooting up. “And you didn’t tell me?”

Stiles bites his bottom lip and looks down, feeling bad. Maybe this is how Derek felt when Stiles found out. It sucks. He wishes he could’ve told Scott because he tells Scott  _ everything _ , but he was told to guard this secret with his life because it could put this family that he loves so much in danger. He only had one choice, and he stands by making it.

“I had to protect them,” Stiles finally says, looking up and rolling his shoulders back, standing up straighter. “But now you know because there’s more to this bite than it healing super fast.”

Scott swallows and nods for Stiles to continue. Fortunately, he knows Stiles’ serious tone and knows when Stiles needs his complete attention. Fortunately, he picks up on it now.

Except, Stiles takes a step back and gestures to Laura because this is her job that her mom gave her.

Laura nods in acknowledgement and starts explaining to Scott what’s going to happen, what he will experience, and that he’s now transitioning to a werewolf.

Stiles leans against the counter with a sink next to Derek. His side leans up against Derek, and he has to resist the urge to drop his head to Derek’s shoulder. Derek leans back against him, lending him some courage and comfort that Stiles definitely needs right now. He listens to Laura explaining everything, intrigued about what Scott will experience.

From what Laura is saying, it doesn’t sound pleasant whatsoever. Stiles silently vows to be there for Scott because his best friend needs him right now.

“Of course, if you want, you are welcome to be part of our pack,” Laura ends with.

“Do I have to be part of a pack?” Scott asks, looking at Talia worriedly.

“No,” Laura answers. “But I highly suggest you join one because being an omega - a werewolf without a pack - is especially dangerous when there’s an unknown, rogue alpha loose. This alpha has a connection to you now, and the only way to protect yourself against that is to join a pack.”

Stiles had no idea about this, and he realizes there is still so much about werewolves and this supernatural world that he doesn’t know. It makes him so much more eager to know more, to learn as much as he can from Talia and Deaton. 

“Wow,” Scott breathes out, slouching.

Stiles steps up to him and wraps his arm around Scott’s shoulders. “It’s okay, buddy,” Stiles says. “I’m here for you. Every step of the way.”

“Are you part of the Hale pack? Are you a werewolf?” Scott asks, eyes wide.

“Yes and no,” Stiles answers easily. “I’m not a werewolf, but I’ve been around them my whole life. The Hales are safe, and they’ll protect you with their lives. I have no doubt about that.”

“Even if I don’t join their pack?”

“You’re family to Stiles,” Talia says, stepping closer to the table. “That means you’re family to us even if you don’t want to be a part of our pack.”

Scott nods smiles softly at Stiles and nods. “I need to think about it. Am I safe to go home?”

Deaton steps up now and slowly moves towards Scott’s side, silently asking for permission. Scott nods at him, so Deaton gently pokes at Scott’s healed werewolf bite. Now, it’s just at outline of a set of teeth, the skin slightly reddened, but it’s no longer an open wound. 

“I would say yes,” Deaton says, stepping back. “As long as Alpha Hale agrees.”

She frowns as she thinks about it deeply.

“Is your mom home tonight?” Stiles asks suddenly.

Scott shakes his head. “She’s working.”

“I’d prefer it if you stayed with us,” Talia finally says. “I don’t feel comfortable with you being alone. We have a guest room you can stay in, and Stiles can spend the night as well, so you have someone you know there. I would feel better if you had some protection tonight.”

Scott nods. “Can I stop by my house to grab clothes and stuff for school?”

“Of course,” she says and nods at Derek. “Can you go with him?”

“I can drive,” Stiles chimes in, knowing he needs to be with his best friend right now.

Derek agrees to go with them as protection. They all part ways, Laura and Talia giving Stiles and Derek hugs before they do. Talia rests her hand on Scott’s shoulder and gives him a soft smile as she says goodbye.

When they’re all in the car, driving towards Scott’s house, it’s quiet. No one knows what to say, especially not Stiles. He feels like Laura said mostly everything, and Stiles doesn’t know what she didn’t say well enough to fill in Scott. Plus, it’s a bit of information overload to continue with it all.

“They’re really good people,” Stiles finally says to Scott. “The Hales.”

“Yeah,” Scott says, and from the rearview mirror, Stiles can see him nod his head. “What am I gonna tell my mom? What am I gonna tell Allison?”

“You can tell your mom,” Derek answers because Stiles is at a loss. “Allison...is a little trickier and probably a conversation we should have another time. There’s more information you should know before you talk to her about this.”

“Like?” Stiles asks because this is something he doesn’t know, and he can’t stand not knowing.

Derek turns his head to look at Stiles, so Stiles glances at him and notices his tired eyes. “Not tonight please,” Derek says softly.

Stiles reaches over and grabs Derek’s hand. “Yeah, got it.”

Derek squeezes his hand.

“What is that smell?” Scott asks.

Derek laughs. “Probably affection, something like that. It’s hard to accurately name all the scents.”

“Oh,” Scott says. “I can smell emotions?”

“Yeah,” Stiles answers. “It’s wild, bro. I can’t hide anything from anyone now.”

Scott laughs, but it doesn’t sound as genuine as it usually does. It’s been a long night for Stiles, but it’s been an even longer one for Scott, and it’s probably been a bit traumatic. There’s no easing into this world, but the way Scott learned about it isn’t an easy way, and Stiles really does feel for him, especially with how hard Laura said the transition and training is going to be. Stiles wishes he could change everything for his best friend because this isn’t easy. This information isn’t easy to digest or to know. It’s hard to keep this secret from everyone. Stiles has been fortunate in that he only had to hide it from Scott, but Scott has to hide it from his girlfriend.

Once he’s parked outside Scott’s house, his head hits the headrest, and he sighs. “We’ll be in here,” Stiles tells Scott. “Just please be quick, okay?”

Scott nods and climbs out after Derek gets out and pushes the seat forward. Derek climbs back in and lets out a breath. 

“Not how I expected this night to go,” Stiles says quietly.

“Not at all,” Derek agrees. “But Scott’s okay. He’s gonna be okay. He has you, and he has us to help him. In terms of being newly bitten, he’s lucky to have such an extensive support system honestly.”

Stiles nods and pushes his lips together as he looks out the window. “It’s still gonna be hard for him. Harder than I can imagine.”

“Yeah,” Derek doesn’t hesitate to say. “I don’t know what it’s like to be bitten, but from what I’ve heard from stories, it’s not easy. It takes a lot of practice and training to get used to it.”

“And there’s still that alpha on the loose,” Stiles realizes, his eyes widening. “Fuck how did I forget about that?”   
“You were focused on your best friend,” Derek says, defending Stiles. “But yeah. We still have to worry about the rogue alpha.”

“Fuck,” Stiles breathes out. 

“Yup.”


	25. Chapter 25

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay hi wow. it's been a while, hasn't it? *looks at the date* a month? wow. okay, so i'm gonna try to make up for this by posting today and then again Monday if i'm able to get another chapter done before then. fingers crossed i'll stick to a schedule this time. life has just been hard pls forgive me and enjoy!

Scott is quick to pack up his stuff, and the drive to the Hale house is quiet save for Stiles asking Derek to text his dad for him.

“Can you ask him to call me when he has a second?” Stiles asks. “I need to update him and let him know where I’ll be tonight.”

Derek grabs Stiles’ phone and easily unlocks it with the passcode because Stiles told him it a couple weeks ago when they were driving. Stiles has nothing to hide from Derek and trusts him completely. 

When they get to the Hale house, Stiles realizes that Scott has fallen asleep in the backseat. For a moment, he looks worry-free, and Stiles knows as soon as he wakes him up, his face won’t be so relaxed. Stiles can feel it on his on his own face, the tense frown and creased eyebrows. He can even see it on Derek’s face.

“Come on, buddy,” Stiles says softly, reaching behind him and gently nudging Scott’s knee. “There’s a very comfy bed inside waiting for you.”

“Mmm... okay,” Scott mumbles, sitting up with his eyes closed.

Derek jumps out of the jeep and pulls the front seat forward so he can help Scott get out and walk to the front door. Stiles grabs Scott’s stuff and follows them inside. Scott is heavily leaning against Derek, and Stiles wishes had someone to lean against at the moment. He’s also exhausted, but soon... soon there will be a bed in his future.

Stiles and Derek get Scott set up in the guest bedroom and then leave him alone per his request.

“I’ll see you in the morning,” Scott says around a yawn.

Stiles waves at him half heartedly. “Yeah, morning. See you then.”

Without question, Derek lets Stiles follow him upstairs into his room. Once the door is closed, Stiles strips his jeans and shirt off and then falls into Derek’s bed. 

“You have to make room for me,” Derek tells him, sounding tired but not entirely upset.

Stiles just groans into the pillow his face is in and then rolls over towards the wall so Derek can climb in. An arm wraps around him from behind, pulling him closer to Derek. It’s so comfy and warm and safe that Stiles falls asleep faster than he has in a very long while.

The kitchen is loud and busy and full of people in the morning. Talia and Derek are cooking eggs, bacon, and pancakes. There’s enough food to feed at least three more families, but from experience, Stiles knows the werewolves eat a lot. Something about a faster metabolism that digests food faster or something. Cora tried explaining it, but it ended up with both of them confused.

Scott is sitting at the table, looking unsure of everything. Laura is sitting next to him, but she’s scrolling on her phone. Every few seconds, she’ll glance at Scott, though, probably checking on him and making sure he’s not gonna run away.   
Stiles sits next to Scott and purposefully bumps his shoulder into Scott’s. “How are you feeling?” Stiles asks.

Scott sniffs and shrugs. “I feel..different. Things are sharper.”

Laura looks up from her phone immediately, putting the device down with the screen against the table. 

Scott glances at her and the phone with a wince. “Everything is louder.”

“Sorry,” Laura whispers, shrinking into her chair a little.

Scott waves it off. “It’s just something to get used to, right?”

She nods. “Yeah, you’ll get used to it, and we can help you learn to control your senses enough that you can tune a lot of it out.”

“That would be helpful,” Scott comments. 

Stiles eyes the empty table in front of Scott. “Do you want something to drink while waiting for breakfast?”

“What do they have?” Scott asks.

“Everything you could ever want,” Stiles laughs. “Obvious stuff like water and milk and then like every kind of juice I’ve ever heard of and some I haven’t heard of. I highly recommend the white cranberry peach juice, though. That shit is  _ amazing _ .”

Scott laughs and nods. “That sounds interesting. I’ll try it.”

Stiles shoots up to grab it, dancing around Talia and Derek as he does. He leans against Derek’s back for a moment as he’s scrambling eggs and kisses his cheek. “Good morning,” Stiles says quietly. 

“Morning,” Derek says, turning his head to give Stiles a proper kiss. “You snore.”

“ _ You _ snore!” Stiles says, offended. He walks to the fridge to pull out the juice and then grabs two cups for himself and Scott.

Derek laughs. “Sure, whatever helps you sleep at night.”

“What if snoring helps me sleep at night?” Stiles retorts.

“Then snore away,” Derek says, unbothered. “Just don’t expect to be sleeping in my bed again.”

“Rude,” Stiles mumbles under his breath as he pours the juice. He places the cups down when he gets to the table, and then remembers his dad never called him last night. “I need to go call my dad,” he says to the room before disappearing outside with his phone.

“Hey, son,” his dad answers, sounding tired.

“Hey, Dad,” Stiles says automatically. “You okay?”

His dad sighs. “Long night at work. I just saw your text. Are you okay?”

“Long story short, Scott was bit by an alpha werewolf,” Stiles says, rubbing his forehead as he does. Saying it out loud to another person makes him feel so much more stressed than he was a second ago. It’s easy to forget about how stressful the situation is when he can just pretend he’s having a sleepover at his boyfriend’s house with his best friend even though that sounds a bit ridiculous. Stiles’ life is just ridiculous.

“Is he a werewolf now?” Stiles’ dad asks.

“Yup,” Stiles says.

His dad lets out a long breath. “How is he doing?”

Stiles looks through the glass door into the Hale house. Scott is hunched in his chair and poking at his plate of food. “He’s...okay,” Stiles finally decides on. “I can’t imagine that it’s easy for him right now. From what Laura and Talia have said, it’s not going to be easy.”

“Well at least he has all of you to help,” Stiles’ dad says. “I gotta get back to work, but I think the case I’m working on might need Talia’s expertise. Please ask her to call me when she gets a chance.”

“Will do.”

“Love you, son.”

“Love you, Dad,” Stiles replies easily. “Stay safe.”

“Will do.”

When Stiles goes back inside, everyone looks up and smiles at him. He smiles back at them, and they go back to eating and talking like they were before. It’s so nice to walk into a room and have every person in that room happy to see you. Stiles thinks this must be what it’s like to have a big family.

There’s an empty chair between Scott and Derek with a plate in front of it on the table loaded with Stiles’ favorite breakfast foods. He squeezes himself between the chair and Derek and sits. There are so many conversations going on that Stiles can’t follow. He can hardly tell who is talking to who. 

He takes a deep breath and tries to relax. The noise level is a little overwhelming, and suddenly, Stiles partially understands why Scott is just picking at his food and not digging in like everyone else.

Stiles scoots closer to Scott and leans into him. “It takes some getting used to if I remember correctly.”

Scott looks up at Stiles and blinks in confusion for a moment until Stiles nods at everyone. “Oh,” Scott says. “I hope so. I can’t imagine what school is gonna be like today.”

Everyone stops talking at once, their eyes landing on Scott. It’s Talia who breaks the silence, though. “Honey, you’re not going to school today,” she says softly. “You might want to call your mom and have her meet you here actually.”

“Why?” Scott asks. “She doesn’t need to be involved in any of this.”

“Are you close with her?” Talia asks.

“Yes,” Scott answers.

“Then I think she needs to know,” she says. “She loves you, and you are still her responsibility, so she needs to know how best to take care of you since I highly doubt you’d want to move in here.”

“No offense, but no,” Scott mumbles and then sighs. “Okay. I’ll call her.”

Stiles puts a hand on Scott’s shoulder, trying to comfort him. Scott leans into Stiles slightly as he finally takes a bite of bacon.

“Thanks for breakfast,” Stiles chirps, changing the conversation. “And for letting me crash.”

“No problem,” Derek answers with a soft smile that Stiles has only ever seen directed at him.

“It’s always a pleasure to have you here, Stiles,” Talia says with a genuine smile. “But you may have to take some of your food to go or you may be late for school.”

“What?” Stiles says around a mouthful of eggs. “I still have to go?”

“What’s your excuse not to?” Laura asks, sounding way more maternal than Stiles has heard her be before.

“Uh, gotta provide my buddy some support,” he says, patting Scott’s shoulder.

“I’ll be fine,” Scott says. “You need to go.”

“Et tu, Scotty?” Stiles asks, offended. 

Scott shrugs Stiles’ hand off of his shoulder and starts digging into his food.

“You’re going,” Derek says with a voice of authority.

Stiles looks over at Derek and raises an eyebrow. “And who says you get to boss me around?”

“As your personal tutor,” Derek says, “I recommend you go so you stay on top of your schoolwork.”

“Ugh,” Stiles groans. “Using logic against me. Smart move, Hale.”

Derek stands up and grabs Stiles’ plate. Stiles almost protests until he sees Derek grab a paper plate and scoop the food onto it. “I’ll drive. You eat.”

“Fine,” Stiles agrees then looks around. “Uh, where are Bruce and Aaron?”

“They’re keeping tabs on the preserve. Laura and I will switch out with them in a few hours,” Talia answers. 

“Doesn’t Aaron have school?” Stiles asks and then stops. “He doesn’t go to our school, does he? I haven’t seen him around in a while.”

“He’s homeschooled now,” Derek answers. “He’s having a hard time with controlling his shift.”

“Oh,” is all Stiles can say.

“Which is why you haven’t seen him around in a while,” Derek continues explaining. “He isn’t...the safest to be around for a human. Dad’s helping him.”

“Good,” Stiles says, hiding the fact that he feels immensely guilty for forgetting about two of the Hales. 

Derek walks over to him, grabs his hand, and pulls him out of the kitchen. “It’s okay, Stiles. You’ve had a lot going on. And we never brought it up in front of you. It’s not entirely your fault.”

“ _ Entirely _ ,” Stiles emphasizes. “Sure.”

Derek rolls his eyes and pulls Stiles closer to give him a kiss. “Everything is good. No one is mad at you.”

“Okay,” Stiles says on an exhale. “Thank you.”

Derek kisses him again until Cora comes in the room.

“Come on, losers. We’re gonna be late.”

Derek glares at the back of her head, and she must sense it because she raises her fist with her middle finger pointing straight up.

“You and your siblings are  _ rude _ ,” Stiles comments.

“True,” Cora and Derek say at the same time.

“Freaky,” Stiles whispers, knowing full well they can hear him.

They pile into Stiles’ jeep with Stiles in the passenger seat, Derek in the driver’s, and Cora in the back. Stiles eats the whole way to school while Cora talks about lacrosse and how she and Kira are getting close to wearing Coach down enough to let them on the team.

Stiles grunts and nods along to what she’s saying, pretty sure he’s going to forget this conversation within an hour. He really needs to see the psychiatrist again. How he’s going to fit that into his hectic life, he doesn’t know.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> can we pls not talk about how i forgot about two whole fucking characters for like 12 chapters???? kthx


	26. Chapter 26

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry it's been forever! hope you enjoy this chapter. the next one is already in the works so hopefully it won't be too long until the next update.

“So what you’re saying is, I can’t date Allison anymore?” Scott asks.

“I’m not saying that,” Talia responds patiently. It’s been a bit of a difficult conversation. 

Turns out, the Argents are hunters. As in Allison Argent’s family is made up of werewolf hunters. Scott isn’t taking it very well as in he’s having a hard time understanding why this would be dangerous for him. 

“I’m saying that,” Stiles interjects. “You shouldn’t date Allison. She’s dangerous.”

“What if she doesn’t even know about werewolves?” Scott asks. “I think I would’ve been able to tell if she was dangerous.”

“How?” Stiles asks.

Scott looks at Stiles meaningfully. “You didn’t know Derek was a werewolf?”

“That’s different.”

“How?” Scott challenges.

“It just is!”

Derek places a hand on Stiles’ shoulder from where he’s standing behind Stiles’ chair in Talia’s office. “It isn’t different.”

“Traitor,” Stiles mumbles, knowing full well everyone in the room can hear him. He still leans into Derek’s touch, but that doesn’t matter okay. What matters is his best friend willingly putting himself in danger.

“I love her, Stiles,” Scott says, looking at Stiles closely. “Don’t you get that? Derek is dangerous for you and yet you’re with him.”

Stiles glares at Scott for a good minute and then slumps. “You’re right. You’re completely right.”

Derek rubs Stiles’ shoulder comfortingly. “We’ll keep an eye on him.”

“I would like to keep a  _ close _ eye on you and would prefer you not be totally alone with her,” Talia says. “As a precaution. We don’t know what she knows, and you are not under your best control yet, so there is a risk you might unintentionally hurt her.”

Scott nods. “It’s for both of our safeties.”

“Yes,” Talia agrees.

“How do I spend time with her though?” Scott asks. “If we can’t be alone then...”

“Double dates!” Stiles suggests. “Derek and I can go on dates with you. We’re all friends. It’s not like weird that we would want to hangout, right? And Derek can keep you in check, Scotty, and I can interrogate Allison.”

“You will do no such thing,” Derek says immediately.

“I have to agree with Derek,” Talia says before Stiles can complain. “Hunters can be volatile and dangerous. We don’t know what kind of hunter she is yet or if she is one. It’s best to not aggravate anything.”

Stiles sighs but accepts what they’re saying. It makes sense, which he hates to admit. It’s not easy admitting he’s wrong, but whatever. 

“I need to go to Deaton’s,” Stiles says when he checks his phone for the time. “Time for some spark training.”

Derek follows Stiles out and goes with him to Deaton’s for protection. Since it’s night and dark and there’s a rogue alpha on the loose, no one is comfortable with Stiles being completely alone. Not until he has a better handle on his spark at least. Stiles tried to fight it, but it was definitely a losing battle, especially when they brought his dad into the conversation.

It’s the first night at Deaton’s where Stiles is really learning how to be a spark. Deaton said he’s going to try and make the process as fast as possible since they’re going to need help with the alpha. However, that makes the process much more rigorous and demanding physically and mentally.

“Good to see you, Stiles and Derek,” Deaton says when they walk in.

“Only saw you last night,” Stiles says. “Not like it’s been awhile.”

“Good to see you, Deaton,” Derek says, pointedly staring at Stiles.

Stiles rolls his eyes and follows Deaton into an exam room. Deaton closes the door behind them and gestures Derek to a chair that’s in the corner. Once Derek is seated, Deaton turns to Stiles and softly smiles.

“Do you have any questions before we get started?” he asks.

“I don’t think you got to finish your answer of what a spark is,” Stiles says.

Deaton nods and then thinks for a moment before speaking. “It’s hard to put into words. It is a bit of magic inside of you that helps you channel other energies. You can connect with nature or with people or animals. Sparks can be very dangerous depending on who they are facing.”

“So I have the potential to be a badass?” Stiles asks excitedly. “I’m not just some helpless human in a pack of werewolves?”

“No, you are not,” Deaton answers, not as amused as he should be. “Not that any human is helpless. You learned about hunters, yes?”

“Yes.”

“Then you know it is very possible for humans to be quite the opposite of helpless.”

Stiles nods, knowing he’s right. “So what am I learning today?”

Two hours, two gallons of sweat, and a quart of tears and blood later, Stiles can now successfully light a candle without a match or lighter. That is the progress he made, which according to Deaton is a lot, and a lot of effort went into it, but it doesn’t feel like a lot. Stiles wants to be helpful. He wants to be able to take on a rogue alpha himself, but he can’t.

“Alphas are stronger than regular werewolves,” Derek explains as he drives an exhausted Stiles back to his house. Stiles’ dad is more comfortable with Stiles staying at the Hale’s when he works night shifts. “They get energy from the members of their pack and from just being an alpha. This rogue alpha won’t be easy to take down for you or even me.”

“So what you’re saying is, we’re both weak as fuck?” Stiles tries to laugh, but he’s way too exhausted.

Derek just rolls his eyes and puts a hand on Stiles’ knee. “What I’m saying is, there is strength in numbers. That’s why we have a pack.”

It makes sense because of course it does. It’s Derek. Derek always makes sense, which is frustrating. Stiles doesn’t say anything, though. He just takes a deep breath and settles deeper into the seat. Somehow, his hand finds its way to the top of Derek’s hand, and it’s warm like it always is. God, he just loves Derek so much and doesn’t know what he would do without him.

“I love you too,” Derek says.

“Wait,” Stiles stops, freezing.

“Oh.” Derek sounds so  _ disappointed _ and he starts taking his hand back, but Stiles holds onto it for dear life.

“No!” Stiles almost shouts. “No. I mean I don’t regret saying it. I just didn’t mean to. It’s true, though. I love you. A lot. Please don’t take your hand back. I like it.”

There’s a soft smile on Derek’s face as he relaxes his hand back on Stiles’ knee. “I love you too. A lot. I guess my hand is yours now.”

“Good,” Stiles says, squeezing Derek’s hand.

When they get back to Derek’s house and get inside, they can immediately feel the tension. Everyone is sitting in the living room, and by everyone, it’s Talia, Bruce, Laura, Aaron, Cora, Scott, and Scott’s mom, Melissa. Talia is standing behind the couch as though she was waiting for Stiles and Derek to get home. Bruce is on the edge of his armchair. Laura is sitting on the arm of the sofa, looking like she is ready to jump up and attack. Cora is in the middle of the couch, curled into herself with Aaron’s arm around her. Scott and Melissa are on the loveseat, their hands in their laps because it’s something they both do when they’re nervous.

“Okay.” Stiles is immediately ready to throw down if needed. “What’s going on?”

“Someone else was bit,” Talia says, her voice serious but sad. 

“Did they survive?” Derek asks.

“People can die from the bite?” Stiles jumps in, looking between Derek and Talia.

“Yes,” Talia answers. “To both of you. She survived and is in Melissa’s care now. Her parents took her to the hospital when she was bit, and the hospital had no idea what was going on with the poor girl.” She looks at Stiles. “Your father called me this morning about it, and after telling Melissa, she was prepared to help.”

“What does this mean?” Stiles asks.

“It means we have someone else to train and bring into the pack.” Talia’s chin sticks out as if she is daring anyone to fight her on it. “As long as we can reach whoever the alpha bites first, we can save them from being part of its pack unwillingly. They already get the bite without consent, we can at least make sure they’re safe.”

Melissa nods her head and wraps an arm around Scott’s shoulders. “And I can be your eyes at the hospital in case anyone else comes in with a wolf bite.”

“The sheriff is also on the lookout,” Bruce reminds Talia.

“You have us at the high school,” Stiles says, gesturing to himself, Scott, Cora, and Derek. “Since it seems like it’s only going after younger people.”   
“Yes,” Talia agrees. “The latest victim is a girl from you school. Erica Reyes?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yay for accidental love confessions and also the promise of Erica!


	27. Chapter 27

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i wrote this like a week ago? and never posted it? idk why but uh here it is and i hope you guys enjoy

Stiles can feel the way Derek tenses up beside him. He looks over to check on Derek, and it’s like Derek’s eyes are glazed over. Stiles grabs Derek’s hand and puts a hand on his face. “Der?” 

There’s no response almost like Derek didn’t hear him, so Stiles pats his face to get his attention. “Are you okay?” His voice is starting to sound scared even to him because Derek isn’t responding.

Suddenly Talia is right next to Stiles, shaking Derek’s shoulder a little more aggressively than Stiles would. They both say his name a couple more times, so then Talia flashes her red eyes, which makes Derek’s eyes flash blue. He blinks a couple times and comes back to them.

“Is Erica okay?” Derek asks, his eyes still blue. “Where is she? Can I see her? Has anyone explained what’s going on to her?”

Talia grabs Derek, so Stiles takes a step back, and she hugs him close to her. He’s a few inches taller than her, but somehow she is able to fold him into her like she must have when he was a child. She rubs his back and soothes him.

“Do you know Erica?” she asks.

“She’s a friend,” Derek answers, his voice monotone. “A really good friend. She has epilepsy. Is she okay?”

“She’s okay. You can see her. We haven’t told her what’s going on, just her parents. She’s still sleeping in her bed, but I think it would be a good idea for her to hear it from you. Maybe it’ll be more comforting.”

Derek nods, taking a deep breath. He reaches over and grabs Stiles’ hand, and Stiles is quick to squeeze it. “Will you go with me?”

“Yeah, of course,” Stiles answers. 

“I’ll have her parents let me know when she wakes up and that you two will go over there when she does,” Talia says, releasing Derek from her hug. She cups his face with her hand and pats his cheek gently. “I love you, my son.”

“Love you too, Mom.”

Then she looks at Stiles and puts a hand on his cheek. “I love you, my son.”

“I love you too,” Stiles says, trying not to tear up. He just loves this family so much.

Derek leads Stiles upstairs after the tension is gone. Derek falls face first onto his bed and then curls into a ball, facing the wall. Stiles curls up behind him, wrapping an arm around him and holding him close. Derek keeps still, so Stiles curls his body around him, tucking his legs behind Derek’s and dropping a kiss to Derek’s shoulder. 

“If this isn’t what you want, feel free to push me away. I won’t take it personally.” Stiles waits for an answer, which comes in the form of Derek slowly relaxing. First, he kicks off his shoes and then he scoots closer to Stiles. He doesn’t say anything, but Stiles can feel the tension slowly release from his body. Finally, he turns his head towards Stiles.

“What do you need?” Stiles whispers because he is unsure.

“Loosen your grip,” Derek tells him, so Stiles immediately does as he’s told, and Derek flips over so they’re facing each other. “I’m going to be weird for a sec.”

“Okay?” Stiles wants to laugh, but Derek isn’t meeting his eyes and is being vulnerable, so it’s not the time to laugh.

Too fast for Stiles to see, Derek moves his face into Stiles’ neck. Immediately, Stiles rolls onto his back and arches his neck to give more access. That seems to be exactly what Derek needed because he growls and rubs his face in Stiles’ neck. Without thinking about it, Stiles’ eyes close and his hand goes to Derek’s hair. He plays with it absentmindedly while Derek continues rubbing Stiles’ neck with his face.

Stiles isn’t gonna lie. It’s kind of weird, but it doesn’t feel too bad, especially when Derek starts kissing his neck. He starts behind Stiles’ ear and then moves down to his collarbone, pulling his shirt down for access to the skin.

“Okay you keep that up and I’m going to get way too interested,” Stiles says with a laugh.

Derek stops with a quick kiss right under Stiles’ jaw. “As much as that sounds amazing, I can’t right now.”

Stiles pulls on Derek’s hair to pull his head up so they’re looking at each other. “Can we talk now?”

Derek falls to his side, head resting on the same pillow as Stiles. He wraps an arm around him and nods.

“What was that?” Stiles asks. “I didn’t mind it, obviously, but why did you do that?”

“It’s called scenting,” Derek answers, his voice soft. He’s tense again, so Stiles puts a hand on his face. Derek turns his head quickly to kiss Stiles’ palm and then looks back at him. “It makes you smell like me. I felt...unsafe. Being with you makes me feel safer and having you smell like me is just comforting.”

“Why do you feel unsafe?” 

“Erica was bit. We have no idea where this alpha is in our territory, and it’s hurting people. I’m scared, Stiles.”

Words don’t seem to be what Derek needs right now, so Stiles leans in and kisses Derek for a moment and then rests his forehead against his. “We’re safe. Erica is safe. We’ll go see her and she’ll be comforted that you are there for her. And I’ll be there for her too.”

“I love you,” Derek sighs, closing his eyes. 

Stiles kisses him again. “I love you too.”

“Thank you.”

“You don’t have to thank me. This is what I’m here for.” Stiles pushes closer to Derek, folding himself into Derek’s body with his head under Derek’s chin.

Derek holds Stiles closer, and Stiles can feel him relax again, the tension leaking out of him. He stays awake long enough to hear when Derek’s breaths become long and slow then Stiles lets himself fall asleep in the comfort of Derek’s arms.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i just realized it's monday and i posted this on a monday. accidentally back on schedule???? or am i going to say "fuck the schedule?" who knows  
> also, i'm going to try to make the next chapter longer.


	28. Chapter 28

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> listen i'm trying to update weekly but like.... it's hard  
> anyway, another short chapter sorry!

Derek wakes with a start, which jolts Stiles awake. He’s sitting upright and staring at the door before he says, “Come in.”

Talia opens the door slowly and smiles softly at them. “Erica is awake.”

Derek jumps over Stiles to get his shoes on and then looks back at Stiles with an eyebrow raised. “You coming?”

Stiles narrows his eyes. “Not all of us have super speed, okay. Give me a second.”

They still manage good time to the Reyes household despite Stiles’ human speed. Derek is almost vibrating with energy even though it’s the middle of the night. And even though it’s the middle of the night, the door opens almost immediately after Derek knocks softly.

“Derek,” Erica’s mom sighs in relief, pulling him into a hug. “She’s in her room.”

She ushers them into the house, and Stiles follows Derek to Erica’s room, noticing all the pictures on the walls in the hallway. Erica is an only child according to the pictures, and she looks so happy as do her parents. Stiles hates that her entire life was changed without her consent.

Derek knocks on the second door on the left of the hallway and then opens it. “Erica?”

“Derek?” Erica sounds confused, which makes sense.

Stiles pops his head in. “Do you want me in here or do you want me to wait outside?”

Erica narrows her eyes slightly at Stiles, but not unkindly. “Why is your boyfriend here, Derek? Why are  _ you _ here?” She looks back at Derek with raised eyebrows.

“I’ll go wait in the living room,” Stiles decides. He makes his way back to the living room where Erica’s parents are sitting on the couch looking exhausted and drinking coffee.

Stiles gestures to a recliner, and they both nod.

“Please sit,” her dad says. “You’re the sheriff’s boy, right?”

Stiles nods his head. “Yeah.”

“So he knows about all of this?” Erica’s mom asks.

“He does.” Stiles feels awkward, unsure of what he’s supposed to say. “For what it’s worth, I’m sorry for what happened.”

Erica’s mom smiles softly, but it doesn’t reach her eyes. Her eyes look heavy like she’s fighting to keep them open. “I’m used to the sleepless nights and the worry with Erica’s epilepsy, but this is different. I can’t research this. I can’t google what to do when your teenage daughter becomes a werewolf.”

Erica’s dad reaches over and grabs her hand. 

“From what I know, it’s going to be really hard,” Stiles says. “Which I’m sure Talia told you, but she’ll be protected. The Hale’s are capable and knowledgeable about this stuff. They have a huge library you could research in.”

That makes Erica’s mom’s eyes light up. “Thank you.... I’m sorry, but I don’t know your name.”

“Stiles, and I don’t know yours either.”

“Thank you, Stiles,” Erica’s mom says, and her smile looks almost genuine this time. “I’m Karen. This is my husband, Jeff.”

“Nice to meet you both,” Stiles says. “Sorry it’s under some very weird circumstances.”

Jeff laughs once and then takes a sip of his coffee.

That’s when Erica and Derek walk into the living room. She tries to smile at her parents reassuringly, but it’s eerily similar to Karen’s.

“Fucking werewolves, huh?” Erica laughs bitterly.

“Language,” Karen chides, her voice cracking. 

That’s when Erica’s eyes tear up, and she runs to the couch, clinging to her mom who clings back as fiercely. Stiles looks away. It reminds him way too much of what he doesn’t have.

Derek comes and sits on the arm of the recliner Stiles is in. He puts a hand on Stiles’ shoulder, and Stiles rests his cheek on the hand for a moment before quickly brushing his eyes.

“Is she okay?” Stiles asks quietly, knowing Derek can hear him.

Derek nods. “She will be.”

“She is right here.” Erica sits up, flipping her hair over her shoulder and quickly wiping her eyes. “And I am okay. What is Stilinski doing here?”

“He knows everything,” Derek says with a shrug. “He’s part of the pack.”

That seems to be enough for her because she nods. “How do we tell Boyd?”

Derek swallows and looks away. “I’m not sure.” He looks back at Erica. “I never planned on there being two of us. It was always just me in the group, and even then I didn’t know how to tell you guys.”

Erica looks down at her hands in her lap, biting her bottom lip. “How are we going to protect others?”

“By doing the best we can,” Stiles answers. “I’m working on strengthening myself, and the rest of the pack is training more. We are going to catch this rogue alpha before they can bite anyone else.”

Erica looks up and tilts her head. “Alright, Stilinski, you can stay.”

Stiles’ laugh feels like it’s punched out of him while he shakes his head. “Thanks, Reyes.”

“We should probably head out,” Derek says. “Some of us have school tomorrow.”

Erica smiles widely. “You know me. Any excuse to miss.”

Derek rolls his eyes with a fond smile then they say their goodbyes. Karen gives Stiles a hug before they leave.

When they’re in the car, Derek lets out a long breath and rests his forehead against the steering wheel. Stiles reaches over and rests his hand on Derek’s knee, but doesn’t say anything. They sit like that for a few minutes until Derek sits up again and starts the car. As he drives, he puts a hand over Stiles’, but they both stay quiet.

It isn’t until they’re back in Derek’s room, getting ready to go back to sleep that Derek speaks up. “Did you mean it?”

“Mean what?” Stiles asks, sitting on the bed and looking at Derek, who steps between Stiles’ legs.

Derek cups Stiles’ face, his thumbs brushing Stiles’ cheekbones. “Did you mean it when you said that we’re going to catch the rogue alpha before they can bite anyone else?”

“I meant it,” Stiles says honestly. “I meant that we will try our hardest, and there are so many of us whose best are more than good enough. We got this. I fully believe that.”

Derek leans down to brush his lips against Stiles’. “I love you.”

“Yeah, you say that a lot.”

“It’s because I mean it.”

Stiles smiles widely. “I mean it too.”

**Author's Note:**

> hi, i hoped you guys enjoyed this! i'm hoping to post a chapter once a week on Mondays, so stay tuned!


End file.
